xiggi

DadII, while I realize that telling you to relax will remain as ineffective as it has been so far, you can't let the day-to-day events ruin your last months with your daughter.

Unless I am mistaken, isn't she still in the running for a prestigious scholarship she could use at Duke, one of her "first" choices? What is there left to do to prepare as well possible for the selection process? If anything, concentrate on that one, and let the past be. After all, there is nothing you can do about what was not done with all the care you wished.

Please remember that you only need ONE school. Also remember that despite all the horror stories that are floating on the web, students are evaluated individually and holistically. Comparing the objective data of your daughter to what is reported by others is not very productive. While you KNOW that your daughter's information is true, you can't say the same about ... everything that is written. Even if you know the grades and test scores, the issues of character and dedication to learning are impossible for outsiders to ascertain.

At this stage, all you can do is make a current appraisal of your D's situation and focus on things you still control. Take a piece of paper, write down all parts of the process, and scratch everything that has now become irrelevant. The test scores are in and so is the FAFSA. The grades are in. The only thing that can come your way are essays and preparing for interviews.

And last but not least, I really think your daughter will end up at the school she deserves to attend, and that you'll be able to afford it without bankrupting your future.

Everything looks better in May than it does in February. Trust your daughter and trust the system.

PS And yes, helping at a HS fair might end up counting a LOT more than an extra point on the ACT.