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I agree with Shennie. Top conservatories (in fact most conservatories) are quite competitive, as are some of the top university programs (think Northwestern). Students do need to choose appropriate schools AND with that, need to find a teacher who can move them to the next level in their playing and help them achieve their goals.
How and when did *we* (the parents) figure out that our child had some ability? Well...a prominent university professor ws actually active in our state music educators association. One year, she happened to mention to me (at a social event...we had common friends) that she was looking forward to hearing about DS's scholarships in music. We hadn't even considered that he would be in the running for one. That comment made us realize that our kid actually had a tad more talent than the average bear. Now...move forward years...this same kid has gotten a very good gauge on his playing. He is at a great school with a great teacher...but it's NOT one of the "tippy top" conservatories. However, it's where he should be and he is getting a LOT of playing opportunities and terrific instruction. AND more than that, he is learning that there are orchestral opportunities outside of NYC, Phili, Chicago, Boston and L.A. that he actually has a chance of playing in. He is also learning about marketing, and other career related things.
So...one needs to know about their own level of talent and where their own needs can best be met.
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