This feels like such a silly thing to mention, but one of the things that stood out in the original post was the difficulty you're having communicating with your daughter--emails, phone, in person...all problematic.
If you haven't done so already, look into downloading a program like Skype (
www.skype.com). It's free to load and makes long-distance calling (and potentially video chatting) incredibly cheap and easy. Obviously this in itself isn't a
solution to anything, but maybe if it's very easy for your daughter to call home (and for you to call her), then she'll feel free to do it more regularly, and it'll take away some of the "worst case" worries. Even if the conversations don't feel "deep," it's a way for everyone to feel a bit more connected to one another.
Again, I apologize for how shallow this seems. I just can only imagine what your daughter and the rest of your family are going through; being unable to communicate regularly must make it so much tougher.
Joining others in their prayers for your family.
ETA: Don't forget yourself + your own needs while you're taking care of your daughters and your husband. Just a gentle reminder.