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Now you don't get leadership/excellence just from natural excitement, nor from just enjoying life without achieving anything intellectually.
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Hmmm. If you are saying what I think you are saying, then I disagree with this statement wholehearted. I don't think leadership/excellence necessarily has anything to do with intellectual pursuits, and everything to do with "natural excitement" about something a person enjoys in life.
OP - Do you think you know what your son would have done with his life if college was not a goal? Sometimes I think the "person" is masked or never developed when kids are pressured to conform or achieve to a specific formula.
I've said this once before, but if all would-be applicants could be marooned on a desert island for a year, without the prospect of college admission, then their true intelligence, character, resourcefulness, charity, etc. would be revealed. This is the type of thing admissions officers are seeking to discover, imho.