| I've got a recurring problem with my knee that sometimes means I use crutches or a cane. It can be hard to take a lot of unsolicited help. Everyone is trying to be helpful, but it can make you feel tired of explaining how actually, I can get the door.
So first bit of advice - wait to see if the person might really need some assistance. Given a moment, often the person can solve the problem. Perhaps differently or more slowly than you might have, but being able to do for oneself feels better for most people.
If you do want to offer, make it a general offer "Anything I can do to help?", and try to look friendly, not pitying. No fuss, please! In other words, the same way that you might say it to someone with his hands full, or a parent dealing with a fussy toddler. This lets the person set the agenda, leaving them in control, rather than you telling them what it is that you think they can't handle. It also leaves them free to say, "No thanks, all set".
And understand that sometimes being asked makes folks prickly. Sorry about that, but there's days when the frustration of not being able to do things, or pain, or even having been asked 10 times already, or a fine mix of all three, can make people get a bit hissy. I apologize, but there it is.
Don't stop trying though, I know you're well-intentioned! |