|
My husband and I have four children that left for college in three years. We had an extremely busy life with our children and the first drop off at college was very hard. I cried all the way home and thought about all the things I was going to miss. That first year was the year of first; the first time we did'nt do this with our child or celebrate that with our child. I did not go into the bedroom for a month and then when I did, I would lay in the bed and cry. My heart felt broken. But, then came October and a very short break from school and my house was full again because all the kids were home and so were all of their friends.
I went through this every August for three years and the year our twins left I did not think there would be a tear left. We dropped them off and the final goodbye was heart wrenching. They walked away and I remember calling out to them so they would turn around - I just wanted another look at their faces so I could remember the momentous that would mark this new beginning. (I still remember that goodbye like it was yesterday)
The third year and last child to leave was the most difficult of all. Not because we were sending off our last but because we did not think our last was ready to go. I cried when our daughter left but I also felt that something was different this go around. It was a difficult year for her and for us and now she will return home. I will cry again this year when all the kids leave but my saddest tears will be for the daughter that is not returning. Your children are embarking on a wonderful adventure and if they are ready both academically and emotionally it will be filled with the ups and downs of their emerging adulthood. They will each handle being away differently. Some will call only when things are great, others when things are not so good, maybe when they need money. I have come to learn the pattern for each child and I chuckle when I hear the voice. I love the calls when the grades are good-it reminds me of elementary school when they would run in with the test paper in hand. You may have a child that never tells you what they got on the chem test or math pre-lim. What will make it all easier is that your child is happy. When they are happy and doing well you will be happy. You will miss all of the things you did with them, and for them but, it was all of those things that led to this wonderful time.
I wish I could tell you all to save the tears and the sadness because they are meant for sad occasions but I can't. You will all find that out for yourselves. In a few short months they are home for winter break and then again for summer break and you will all realize how fast the college year really goes. You will miss shopping and cooking for everyone and at the same time you will become accustomed to not shopping and cooking for everyone. I personally do not miss cleaning up ALL the time.
Enjoy this time-It is exciting and wonderful and full of unknowns. Your child will leave for college with one major and come home with another. They will meet new friends,join frats or sororities and grow up faster than you could believe. It is by far the most challenging of times and they need you to be excited with them (even if they don't say it).
As I said earlier, this end of August my real tears are for the one child not returning to school. Good luck to all of you and when you call your childs name as he or she walks away remember they are scared and they need to see a big encouraging smile and excitement in your face. Cry when you get back in the car and leave.
|