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There's a lot of excellent info here on how to build relationships with profs in general, but does anyone have advice on how to go about the gritty details of getting them to write the rec. So assuming you've already gotten a top grade in their class, demonstrated exceptional and genuine interest in the field, gone to office hours a lot, participated in class, and so on...
1. How do you go about actually "popping the question"?
1.a How do you ask for the rec if you had an excellent relationship but it's been a semester or so since you last had a class or did research with that professor?
2. How likely is it that professors will be taken aback/insulted by your wanting to transfer (especially if you are trying to go from a decent school to an elite one)? Will they see it as status grubbing and/or betrayal of your school? In general, how enthusiastic is a professor going to be about helping one of his or her favorite students leave?
3. How do you tactfully give them pointers on what to put in the rec? Is it acceptable to ask to read the rec and then tell the recommender what to change to make your "case" stronger? I read in a law school application guide that you should ideally go out to lunch with the prof and explain why you want to transfer, what your broad goals are etc., and if possible get the professor to be "on your side" so that you and he/her are basically working together to get you in. Is that practical in real life?
Input from people who have recently been through this process themselves would be especially appreciated.
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