Yeah, I noticed some of those errors while typing it up =-\ Particularly the "If this is true..." I guess I should spend five minutes or so editing.
I don't generally use "one" that often in writing, so I didn't know what to do with all the other pronouns, lol. It sounded bad using "one" three times in a relatively short sentence. Would "you" work instead? I know my LA teachers have always said never use "you" but do the SAT people care? It would make it a lot easier, lol.
Truthfully, on the part about benefiting others by staying alive, it didn't sound to me like it made sense, but it seemed like the reader would be able to gather what I meant anyway. I'm saying when you die, everyone in your "imaginary world" dies, too, so not dying is the only way for other people not to die... Which doesn't make sense if you think that they're not real in the first place... But as you said, it sounds like I know what I'm talking about, lol.
With the "What one does know is their own capacity for altruism and their own opposition to misanthropy," (and the previous sentence) I was trying to say something like: You know you will do good for the whole, but there's no guarantee the whole will do good for itself.
I noticed my conclusion was extremely weak, but thought it was better than nothing. Should I have just left it out?
I don't understand what you mean by talk straight. Are you saying my sentences are convoluted? Or that I'm presenting a facade with my rhetoric?