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momsdream - I am definitely not an expert on learning disabilities, although both my good friend's son and my niece have learning problems and I have seen how difficult and stressful it is to properly diagnose and address them. Both my friend and my sister-in-law have needed to have their kids evaluated privately, outside the school system, in order to try to figure out what was going on with their kids. Health insurance may or may not pay for this evaluation.
I wanted to suggest that you have your daughter's vision tested for "convergence insufficiency". It involves inability of the eyes to change focus from close to distant, and can really affect kids' performance in school. My niece was found to have this when she was about 9 or 10, but apparently it isn't checked for in the standard vision screenings that kids have. The problem is addressed simply by eye exercises, as it is actually a muscle problem and the muscles can be strengthened with use. A lot of the things you have described about your daughter, such as immediately forgetting words she has learned, and learning spelling words well but not being able to use them in context, sound similar to my niece's problems. It turned out she could not see clearly when switching her view from the blackboard to the book, or even from a book to the paper she was writing on.
Also, my friend's son is dyslexic, and she has become a self-educated "expert" on this condition. I have heard her talking about it enough to know that it does not necessarily affect the ability to read left to right or involve seeing things reversed or backwards - this is a common misconception.
I wish you the best of luck in helping your daughter - you are ahead of the game compared to the other parents I know in addressing her problem while she is still very young and that will help her greatly in the long run. Many of the parents I know did not key in to this kind of reading problem until the kids were older, around fifth grade.
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