I could never pick out and buy a dress for my daughters without them OKing it. What I have done is to do the legwork online and search for a dress and then I will narrow down ones I think they might like and then I print out the options or send them the links. Once they pick the final choices, I may order two for them and then they try it on and return one. You could look online, send your D the links and have her choose and then you order it and bring it to her when you see her.
It is a bit trickier in your case as she doesn't want sleeveless, spaghetti strap, strapless, etc. as many of the party dresses for young women have no sleeves. The options are less, therefore.
I agree with others about the anthropologie dress, but think the Macy's sheath would work if your D likes that look. I found some other dresses that are not sleeveless of a variety of styles/looks and fabrics and price ranges. I only looked at black dresses since I think you said it was a black and white affair. Besides, a black dress can be used for various occasions in the future. Here are the links:
Basic and not as dressy as the Macy's dress, as it is jersey, but black:
http://www.bluefly.com/pages/product...&Nu=Product+ID
Inexpensive, black, covers shoulders:
http://www.bluefly.com/pages/product...&Nu=Product+ID
Sheer long sleeves:
http://www.bluefly.com/pages/product...&Nu=Product+ID
Black, not as dressy, jersey v-neck with bubble sleeve:
http://www.bluefly.com/pages/product...u=Produc t+ID
Black matte jersey ruched dress, inexpensive:
http://www.bluefly.com/pages/product...u=Produ ct+ID
High Neck sheer cap sleeves:
http://www.bluefly.com/pages/product...u=Produ ct+ID
Inexpensive rayon/spandex with ruffle hem:
http://www1.macys.com/catalog/produc...tegoryID=21857
Cap sleeves Betsy Johnson dress, big markdown, though still more expensive than others, but more partyish:
http://www1.macys.com/catalog/produc...tegoryID=26359
Cute lace party dress:
http://www1.macys.com/catalog/produc...pe=Eve rGreen
Very inexpensive cap sleeve dress:
http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/2912529/...bo=6008190&P=1
While sleeveless, it really covers the shoulders, comes in black, inexpensive:
http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/2885403/...bo=6008190&P=1
V neck kimono style with sleeves (not as dressy but could work):
http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/2890691/...bo=6008190&P=1