Ajadedidealist, I am sorry you have had a less than 100% positive experience at Exeter. In reading your prior posts, I think you made the mistake of not listening to your heart when you toured the schools. There were other schools that made your heart sing, but for whatever reason, you decided to attend Exeter.
I think "fit" is everything--not only for boarding schools, but for colleges, jobs, marriages, etc... You are right, "you can maintain an A-average at Exeter, be head of tons of clubs, have friends and still hate it". If your soul is not at peace, you won't ever feel like you are in the right place.
Hopefully Oxford will be the place where you truly feel happy
. Congratulations!