My personal opinion...
If you're reaching for those schools, your idea is a little familiar. I'm sure they see that "concept" in essays often. The basic arena is good, but you need to up your game.
I'm not saying it's a bad idea. I guess I just need to hear more.
What's your opening sentence? That's really the key.
"The mosh pit is not the exactly the place most people reflect on their life..."