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Date Life at Elite Universities and LACS for AA Students?

PatheticHopeFulPatheticHopeFul Posts: 153Registered User Junior Member
I will be attending one of the Top 25 Liberal Arts Colleges in the country and of course I'm excited about what's next to come. However, the school itself has a small African American population (a measly 4% actually)--fortunately they are working on changing that. I'm a bit worried about the dating "prospects" at my college because of the small percentage of minority students. That isn't to say that I'd be adverse to dating outside of my ethnicity (I'd actually quite welcome it), but I know a good number of students prefer to date within their own ethnicity. And I can respect that different people have different preferences when it comes to dating (i.e. attractiveness, personality, intelligence, ethnicity), but I also don't want to feel "left out" either. We all know that the Top 25 or so universities and LACs tend to have a limited number of AA students, so I was wondering if anyone on CC would like to comment on Dating Life at these colleges if they are attending them or will attend them at the moment. Or if you are still an underclassmen in HS, comment on how you feel about this topic.
Post edited by PatheticHopeFul on
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Replies to: Date Life at Elite Universities and LACS for AA Students?

  • bunny2015bunny2015 Posts: 303Registered User Member
    This is important, I want to know the answer to this one. Bump
  • Jazmine1423Jazmine1423 Posts: 440Registered User Member
    Bumppppp. I wanna know the answer too. I'm a rising senior in high school so I can't comment on it yet, but still. Try also posting in one of the more mainstream forums?
  • PatheticHopeFulPatheticHopeFul Posts: 153Registered User Junior Member
    Ok, I reposted this in the College Search and Selection Forum but if you've stumbled upon this thread pleas feel free to comment on either forum.
  • slickjrslickjr Posts: 5Registered User New Member
    I've actually never dated someone in my ethnicity. I'm also some part Asian but I've only dated white people and a lone Latina girl. Its not that I purposely choose to not date people who I share an ethnicity with but I've rarely met someone who is my ethnicity who I share a life experience type with (black kid in the country club) who I've really matched up with. I expect that when I go to college I'll meet some people of my ethnicity who have had similar experiences to me, I'm looking at the same college situation as you, I just toured Davidson today. When I do meet those people maybe I will date them, maybe I won't but I've personally never felt any reason to consider someone's ethnicity a factor in me wanting to date them.
  • isayhelloisayhello Posts: 15Registered User New Member
    I'm not going to lie- speaking as a black woman in at one of those colleges in New England? It's harder. You should be ready for it. I make an effort to feel and look my best so that I'm less affected by my relative invisibility on campus- at least, compared to when I go into the city. ><

    My sister is at Wellesley and I have a chunk of friends at MIT- it seems like when I visit Boston college parties I get more attention than I do from students at my own university (and having spoken to other black people at my university, people seem to agree that black men here are relatively less attracted to black women than the men other top schools are.) But it is still nothing compared to the attention Asian and (obviously) white women get. Freshman year of college was difficult for me because I spent a lot of time comparing what I was getting to what my Asian and white female friends were getting and felt bitter. Not good for my friendships, and not good for me.

    Now I'm a little older, and I know not to expect a lot out of frat parties. I've found my relationships and hookups through friendships I've made. You just need to be aware that you're not alone, and take care of yourself so that you're confident. It's also good to be a bit more assertive- I've seen that work for people.
  • ForeINForeIN Posts: 887Registered User Member
    I'm still in high school too but most of the colleges I'm looking at has a small percentage of blacks but I live in California so its not like they're the majority of the state's population but I still thought there'd be more.I visited Berkeley a few times and there's like almost no black people in general well I didn't go all around the campus but still.I felt like I stuck out for sure.

    But I'm thinking about going to a CC then transfering to a 4yr so my experience probably will be different.I took a class over the summer at my local cc and was disappointed that there were zero black guys but there were a few black woman.I know colleges usually have more women than men but I hope regular college won't be like that.

    I guess I wouldn't mind dating outside my race but that has yet to happen.Maybe its just me but guys will look and stare but not approach and I'm not one to approach so that'll go no where.

    I say don't worry about it esp if you're a friendly person that talks to every and anyone,plus I'm sure the guys outside your school will be different.Good luck!
  • rowingkid117rowingkid117 Posts: 22Registered User New Member
    bump! I'm interested on how dating life is for minorities in college
  • ForeINForeIN Posts: 887Registered User Member
    I wouldn't care because there's always dating outside the school esp if its near the city.
  • FutureDoctor31FutureDoctor31 Posts: 663Registered User Member
    I'm a rising HS senior and this is how I feel on this topic:

    All of my prospective schools are big state universities (Penn State, UMDCP, UDel, OSU, Temple). At some of these universities, there won't be that big of an African American population, but that doesn't bother me at all. My HS is a sweepingly white majority but extremely diverse school, so naturally I'm used to being around other races. The fact that I don't have classes with a lot of black people doesn't bother me or make me feel uncomfortable one bit. I have mostly white friends (And a lot of Black, Asian, and Hispanic friends, too), so I am used to hanging around people of other races. As long as people respect me, I will be good. You can tell people respect me at my school because my senior class elected me to be the first Black Homecoming King in the history of my school!

    So to answer the question, I would have absolutely no problem dating outside my race. I actually find myself attracted to mixed and bi-racial girls more than anyone else!
  • ForeINForeIN Posts: 887Registered User Member
    Wow that's alsome congrats on the nomination.The first black home coming queen just got crowned at Ole Miss in history!And not to be mean but I wasn't expecting her to be a big girl either but she's beautiful.
  • FutureDoctor31FutureDoctor31 Posts: 663Registered User Member
    It really was awesome. I didn't think I was going to win. I'm a popular guy, but I always underestimate myself. When they announced that I was the king, I couldn't stop grinning lol! Congrats to Ole Miss's homecoming queen! To me, things like this show me that we as people can get along and coexist in society, no matter what race you are. It also shows me that people nowadays care more about what type of person you are rather than what color you are.
  • ForeINForeIN Posts: 887Registered User Member
    Wow you actually won! Yay!
    I don't remember any black guys being king at my school even though they're almost the majority.But this year's set up was terrible with the field being upgraded(both the school's and the local field we always use as home)and the home coming dance was a week after the game so there was no float at the game ect.

    I bet its gona be alsome riding in a classic car or limo at the homecoming game!
  • Buttafly13Buttafly13 Posts: 343Registered User Member
    Wow, Congrats FutureDoctor31! All of the nominees for my school's king and queen were white except for one black girl, and she didn't make it to the last round.

    I don't know how I feel about dating outside my race. I'm mostly attracted to black guys, and that is all I can see my self with. Yea sometimes I think a nonblack guy is cute, but usually it would be a Hispanic or Middle Eastern guy--I like color lol. I have associates/friends of all different races but my closest friends are black; it's just what I feel most comfortable with. I don't feel as though I can be completely myself around nonblacks.
  • alexissssalexissss Posts: 2,177Registered User Senior Member
    ^This.

    Though we differ on preferences. I'm not really into black guys. Still, I feel forced to marry one because they're the only ones I can wholly relate to. T_T lol And besides, guys of other races don't approach me. ^O^
  • ForeINForeIN Posts: 887Registered User Member
    ^me too I would marry a black man or maybe African/Caribbean man in a heartbeat! Second would be Latino or mixed with black.

    The only time other races have hit on me were confusing because I wasn't sure if he was being nice or it was a wannabe....its annoying when another race tries to 'act black' by saying ayy what yo name iz...if that doesn't work for black guys why would it for you?

    -One of my friends got hit on by a guy that said 'well ya know I take an African American course'.that was soo funny because who really says that?

    Oddly I tend to have a lot of asian guy friends but mostly black female friends.

    I'm attracted to all races but I've never had a bf but I've 'talked' to a couple of black guys and one white guy(but I don think he knew I liked him).
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