a friend told me to write a poem about her for the ap lit exam tomorrow.
i'll probably be spending my entire multiple choice time figuring out how to write the poem since i'm screwed for the test anyway. i wonder what the graders are gonna do with that poem LOL.
these are really funny responses guys! keep them coming.
i found this from last year:
In General
-Write a letter:
"Dear College Board,
I was initially apprehensive about taking this exam. However, having just completed it, I am happy to say that I feel confident about my performance today. I hope to get a 5 on this – if not, well at least I tried my best. Thank you for taking your time to grade my work. Even though I (and my parents) are paying you $100 for me to take a test for which I will most likely get a minimal amount of credit for in college, I still appreciate all that you have done to make us students succeed."
-Make a story:
"The interesting thing about the graders is that they are trained on one particular free response question. So, for instance, in AP Calculus, the six free response questions go to six different graders. In principle, the six parts aren't supposed to be compiled except at the very end to bring the final overall score together.
However, at a workshop I attended, the presenter tells the story of the only instance he knows of when all six parts were brought together prior to the scoring.
Turns out that one of the later questions for this student was graded first, and it appeared to be a very in-depth and detailed story that had absolutely nothing to do with Calculus. Because the grader hadn't seen the earlier part, he showed it to a couple of colleagues, and eventually, all the parts were brought together.
When they brought all the parts together, they realized that the story was coming to a tremendous climax right at question #6. Wondering how the story would end, they quickly read to the bottom of the question, where it finally said...
(TO BE CONTINUED NEXT WEEK...
I DON'T KNOW CHEMISTRY EITHER.)"
-Draw stick figures going at it (doggy-style, of course.)
-Draw the male genitalia.
-Write, "I love you, sexy." That's it.
-Trace your hand.
-Say "this rocks my socks!" and draw the respective figures.
-Stuff dollar bills in your FRQ packet.
-Quote an episode of House, MD word for word.
AP Government
-Make a quick note that it was Karl Marx's birthday ... and cross it out, saying that the Karl Marx comment had been censored by the House Un-American Activities Committee.
AP Stats
-"Instead of explaining and interpreting my answers on one AP stat question normally, I drew a little stick figure professor with a pointer and had him explain my answers with speech bubbles. I.e. instead of listing name of test, I drew the little stick figure professor saying "The grader can clearly see the student has chosen a matched-pairs T-test." Most of the humor was in the little professor, not what he actually said. However, at one point, he did say "The T-distribution is shorter and fatter than the normal. Just like this student's statistics teacher!""
AP Computer Science
-Draw an ASCII picture of a fish.
AP Foreign Language
-Write (In foreign language) "Hello, my name is..., i go to... high school, I'm in the 11th grade. I cannot read this question because my teacher did not teach us anything."
-(Spanish) Write "no me gusta" over again and again.
-Make animal noises in the oral section.
AP Calculus
http://img235.imageshack.us/img235/9890/lolmr1.jpg
-Write "2+2=5"
-(BC) Draw a boy with a TI-89 saying "YAY SERIES!"
AP Biology
-Draw a picture of a head with a crude diagram of a brain, with an arrow pointing to the hippocampus.
Then, under it write "My hippopotamus is bigger than yours!!!"
-http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v99/fo0lofato0k/collegeboard.jpg
-http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v99/fo0lofato0k/bio.jpg
-(Q4 2007) Draw a picture of a girl on her knees saying "Go easy on me!"
-Make pickup lines: "if i were an enzyme i'd be helicase so i could unzip your jeans/genes"
-Write an essay about Pokémon Evolution.
-Write Physics equations to prepare for the afternoon test.
-Say that "Chemistry's better than Bio. Even Physics is better than Bio, and that's sad."
-Talk about DEVILoution and William Jennings Bryan.
AP US History
-Draw a picture of Teddy Roosevelt with a big stick.
-In the APUSH essay about Teddy Roosevelt, someone should have written about how America needs Teddy "trust-busting" Roosevelt to come back alive and break up the collegeboard monopoly.
AP English
-Draw a picture to describe how the author conveys his stance.
AP Physics
-(B) Draw a girl roasting a marshmallow at the focus of a concave mirror.
-http://img174.imageshack.us/img174/9516/collegeboardbarronzx3.png
-http://img155.imageshack.us/img155/4656/mousetrapjs8.png
-Say the answers came from magic!
AP Chemistry
-Joke: "A man orders H2O, then the guy behind him orders H2O. He dies."
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