in but not in

pacheight · 10-05-2009, 02:53 PM

anyone else find it stressful for your athlete to be "highly recruited" and supported through admissions but not "in" until admissions accepts them, which is past the time all the other colleges required commitments? So if for some reason they are not admitted they're left with nothing.

Is it like this for others?

ShesOnHerWay · 10-05-2009, 03:20 PM

That is the reason some/most athletes go early decision...so if the worst happens, they still have time to get recruited/apply to other schools. And,yes, the waiting for the real acceptance is unbearable!

pacheight · 10-05-2009, 03:40 PM

unbearable, love it! that's a perfect word.

D is early decision, but the other schools have put deadlines on their offers that are in the next two weeks, which is weeks before she'll know for sure from the school she committed to (and applied ED).

unbearable

ShesOnHerWay · 10-05-2009, 04:34 PM

Last year my D2 was in the same position. She had verbally committed to her school in early October and was putting off the other schools who were pursuing her. Finally, in early November, she asked her college's coach if she could tell the pursing coaches because they were being rather insistent. The coach gave her the go-ahead to write her "Dear Coach" emails. She wrote to them explaining that she had verbally committed to school #1 but also said that she hoped that if something went wrong that she could email the coach (or words to that effect). Anyway, all the pursing coaches returned emails saying to please contact them if it didn't work out with school #1

So I'd say, explain to the committed coach that you are under a lot of pressure from other schools and would like to know how to proceed with them. I'll bet you get the same answer my D2 did.

This doesn't negate the awful wait for the real acceptance which was still 6 weeks away even after the "Dear Coach" letters. FYI - all was fine in the end - the acceptance arrived on time - and D2 is beyond happy at school #1 now.

skrlvr · 10-05-2009, 04:58 PM

My S has just gone through this, and everything ended up well. The admissions process went just as the coach said it would and followed the timetable he said it would.

I know there are all these stories out there about something going wrong, but there are good stories as well.

I agree that your D should contact the coach and ask about what to do with other schools. My S did the same thing.

NorthMinnesota · 10-05-2009, 06:37 PM

What type of schools/leagues are you talking about?

pacheight · 10-05-2009, 10:40 PM

NCAA and top school

"This doesn't negate the awful wait for the real acceptance" love this!

ShesOnHerWay · 10-05-2009, 11:26 PM

D3 - nescac

keylyme · 10-06-2009, 07:03 AM

pacheight...no, which conference as in "Ivy", Patriot League, NESCAC, etc.

People are wondering what type of school is forcing you into such a decision. I feel your pain!!

pacheight · 10-06-2009, 03:00 PM

Ivy, pac10, and maybe NAC, good question, but it's three conferences.

"forcing" made me think too, I don't think any of the colleges are forcing or doing anything unfair or mean-ish. I guess it's just the nature of the process and healthy competition that has it roll out this way, uncomfortable as it is...and this forum helped me see that. thanks!

fauve · 10-06-2009, 07:14 PM

Have you asked the Ivy for a likely letter? If your child has other offers, and is highly desired at the Ivy, the coach can ask admissions for the likely.

Otherwise...deep breathing, long runs and/or beverages of your choice can reduce the stress.

pacheight · 10-11-2009, 09:29 PM

fauve: yes, she got likely letter offers from the Ivy's. she committed to one school...I'm concerned about the old saw the "higher you go the further you 'could' fall"

like all of us, I just don't want her to fall...and land on likely letters she passed on.

breathing, but not very deep

fauve · 10-13-2009, 04:28 PM

pacheight: If she has the likely letter in hand, all is well.

If a disaster should occur on the ED Dec.15 date (adcoms suffer momentary lapse in judgment), contact the other coaches immediately. There can be a whole new scenario as some of their #1 choice recruits fall away.

Shallow breathing is better than none, good luck!

TheGFG · 10-13-2009, 05:01 PM

pacheight: How did she get a likely letter from more than one Ivy? I thought you had to commit to one as your #1 choice first, before they do that for you.

sax · 10-13-2009, 05:55 PM

Princetons fb coach came to HS and pushed my sons friend into appying to Princeton. After going through all the trouble and $$$ Princeton did not admit him. His grades were great etc. They just found someone better at his position.