Parents of the HS Class of 2013 - 3.0 to 3.3 GPA - Page 72

HeavyLidded · 10-18-2012, 11:08 PM

Well, the November 1 deadline is looming and DD has actually done some of the common app. She is STILL struggling with the essay. She can write quite well but is on version three now because none of them felt "real" to her. Transcripts have been requested, SAT scores sent. She still has a number of supplements to do along with the main essay and is waiting on rec letters from teachers (though she requested them in JUNE). Oh. And they readjusted her GPA and rank. GPA dropped and rank fell about 8 spots.

The nice thing is that she told a friend tonight (in my presence) that she would be very happy to attend any of the schools that are on her list. The not nice thing is that I am really second guessing her strategy. Anyone else find themselves doing this?

Jane345 · 10-19-2012, 11:49 AM

Are you second-guessing her strategy of essay re-writes and not doing her supplements as fast as you'd like? You bet. My kid is about 20 minutes of work away from completing several supplements (basically, proofing for typos and making the corrections), and can't seem to find the time to do that. This is me taking a deep breath.

As far as telling people she'd be happy attending any schools on her list: Fantastic! Perfect place to be. If it's not true, it's still a great strategy to employ when talking with others between now and May 1st.

pushydad · 10-19-2012, 12:56 PM

I can sympathize. D is 90% done with a few apps, done with the common app, almost done with a couple of supplements and hasn't even glanced at other supplements. She has been in this state for a few weeks with no further progress. Her scores, transcripts and recs have been sent but Nov 1 looms large. She needs whatever boost EA gives her for all but two safety school and we leave in 5 days to see three more schools. WHAT is she waiting for? If I even attempt to discuss it with her, her head starts spinning and she vomits green pea soup all over me ;-). If you don't get the reference, sorry.

EmmyBet · 10-19-2012, 02:53 PM

So many of us can sympathize!!

I am going to say what we say here many times throughout the app process - please try to keep your eyes on the horizon, and love the kid on the couch. First, keeping your loving relationship is so much more valuable than any results you might get from criticizing or even nagging. Second, please know that in their hearts, no matter how they behave, these kids know their deadlines, know how important this is, and know that they aren't being perfect. Maybe they're afraid, or maybe they are hoping lightning will strike and make them perfect overnight, or maybe they just don't want to show that you are right, but they do care. In May, virtually all will have acceptances, and together you all can be happy with the results. You want to look toward the future as loving friends, not adversaries created by this stressful time.

We've all been there, and we all have things we wish we could do over. Virtually no kid completely blows this process (and if they do, there are probably good reasons that are more important than whether they get into college X, Y or Z). You have many years to celebrate life's joys and sorrows together, so please try to keep this hiccup in perspective. I say that only with kindness and utter humility. Good luck to you all.

MyLB · 10-19-2012, 02:56 PM

So sorry, pushydad. (DH actually knew Linda Blair growing up!)

Count me among the 'rents who are continuing to gently remind their '13s that it would be oh-so-nice to get everything wrapped up by November 1st (and--oh yeah! It's October 19th!). There is good news on the essay front--DS actually came home from school one day this week with a complete draft of The Big One. (And HUGE shout-out to several CC-ers who have provided marvelous feedback!) He also <finally> sat down with his college counselor, who was unaware that he was planning on applying early (because of course DS never told him). So I *think* transcripts are on their way to some schools, but he needs to remind (or inform) LOR-writers too. And oh yeah-- those supplements. I'm hoping those will follow pretty easily after The Big One is finished--fingers crossed this weekend?? (Or am I totally deluding myself?)

RE: strategy, DS still doesn't really have one, except to cast a really wide net. We still have not visited a single school. Might hit up one or two over the winter but I'm hoping to have a crazy-busy spring, which will indicate he actually got admitted at several places.

reeinaz · 10-19-2012, 03:27 PM

I sent my son to school with a list of the last few schools that have deadlines before Jan 1 so that he can get transcript requests in. His response was "More???" Depending on his ED and EA results, he might not actually push go on those applications, but the transcript requests still need to be in just in case.

ACJsMom · 10-19-2012, 04:53 PM

I am a bundle of nerves right now and realizing that I do not know how we're going to pay for college. My DS is a senior, has expressed an interest in Aeronautical, Aerospace Engineering. Pretty lofty goal. Good in math and science. But, he is laid back and does enough to get by...have always heard how he does not reach his potential. Currently has a 3.2 GPA, plays football, baseball and runs track, but not good enough to qualify for a scholarship. Anyway, now we're in the application process, and just getting him to focus is overwhelming on a lot of days. In reading the previous posts, I am so glad to know that I am not alone dealing with a crazy teenager. Keep posting and I will keep reading and muddling through this process.

OHMomof2 · 10-19-2012, 05:05 PM

ACJsmom, there are ways for a 3.2 kid to get good merit aid (mainly by applying to schools with stats a bit lower than his match schools). It also may be that you qualify for some need-based aid - have you run any school calculators or EFC estimators?

There are many more academic scholarships than athletic ones out there, and which ones he might be able to get depend on scores and also on where he applies and what their typical student's grades and scores are. Athletic ability doesn't hurt, either, even though D3 schools don't give athletic scholarships they can generally give academic ones to kids they want, for whatever reason they want them.

Of course don't overlook state schools, or 2 years at a local CC to start.

The financial aid forum here on CC is full of really knowledgeable posters who are glad to share strategies for getting help paying for college.

OHMomof2 · 10-19-2012, 05:16 PM

Oops, double post.

HeavyLidded · 10-19-2012, 07:02 PM

Emmy- Constantly reminding myself of all the things mentioned in your post. I am very aware with each word that comes out of my mouth (or those imagined) that in the end I want to preserve my relationship with DD.

Jane-My second guessing is about which schools she is applying to and what her chances of aid (thereby making them possibilities) will be. I hope I did enough research to steer her in the right decision.

PushyDad- I don't know the reference but I get the sentiment. Same here. Have to choose time and words very carefully at this point!

anniezz · 10-19-2012, 11:06 PM

HL, I think that we're in almost the exact same spot! I feel for our kids - it's clear that they are stressed and having a hard time. And I'm having a hard time keeping quiet - not nagging, but things just blurt out about colleges and I know it just makes it worse! First deadline looming is 11/1. I have a feeling that one EA deadline will probably not be met because there are several essays on the supplement and I don't think they'll get done. It isn't a school that's high on D's list, and there are 2 (or 3?) schools with 11/15 deadlines coming up fast behind it.
Hang in there everyone!

Rubytuesday2 · 10-20-2012, 06:05 PM

A friend sent me a link to an article yesterday, I don't think I can post the link but Google
Sharon Brody's The Parent's Guide to Survivng College Applications

So true!

anniezz · 10-21-2012, 08:46 PM

If we really had until 11/1 it would be nerve-wracking, but not so bad. But - the hs won't send out anything for a school until the app is done and filed, so the app really needs to be done now to ensure that the other documents go out on time. And none of the teacher LORs are in yet. Oh these deadlines!

Ruby, going to google that now...

HeavyLidded · 10-21-2012, 11:53 PM

Ruby- Thanks for the article. Loved it!

Annie- Many of DD's supplements are done but the CA essay is not. ARGHHH!

MyLB · 10-22-2012, 07:17 AM

Annie--you do know that not all of the supporting documentation has to be in by the deadline, right? The *application* needs to be in, but colleges know the student often has no control over when transcripts/LORs are submitted.