Parents of the HS Class of 2010 and college years beyond

[Mablab54]

Robinsuesanders Room assignments don't come till Aug.2.She has someone she requested to room with and communicates on facebook.This girl is very excited to go as mine was at one time.I did let her know that she should not plan on coming home to frequently as she needs to adjust there.No classes on Fridays so she seems to be dwelling on that as a safety net if she really can't stand it. In my heart I think she will be fine once into routine of everyday life. I just know it is going to be along 5 weeks here before we bring her and my patience will not hold up!

[Mablab54]

Thanks YDS and Robin . All the things you have suggested have been brought up in various conversations.

[robinsuesanders]

Mablab,

Hopefully the facebook connection will help. She ought to check to see if there's a facebook group for freshmen at her college. [Is it NYU, or am I misremembering?]

No classes on Friday will give her some time to explore off campus with her new friends, and that should help her with the adjustment.

As for your running out of patience before taking her up to school, just learn to roll your eyes the way my teens do at their parents when they think we're being real dorks about something ...

[Youdon'tsay]

Has she had other experiences being away from home? How did those go?

[CaliforniaDancer]

Welcome back, mdemvizi!

anothercrazymom - Jeffrey Zaslow is our convocation speaker! I'm really excited. Our summer reading is The Last Lecture - I haven't read it yet, but I've heard amazing reviews, so I'm very excited

mablab - I'm not sure I have much advice to offer, but best of luck to your D. I hope that once she gets there, she is able to enjoy her college experience.

In some ways, I feel like I'm pretty on top of my college planning (I leave in less than 3 weeks) - I've bought a number of things. However, I'm still missing a few really key things, like sheets and oh, I don't know, a computer? Those might be important. This week. Really!

[GSharpM7]

Acm – I have never been in Nicholson, but it is near Dupont and looks like it is the same vintage. I imagine that they are similar... spartan, but livable. It is very centrally located to “new campus” where S will probably have most classes, the library, W&M Hall, dining, and the new business school. The thing that he will be the farthest from will be Sorority Court... I can't imagine that he will need to be over there for any reason anyway.

[jambaby]

mablab, I hated everyone in my orientation group - my orientation leader was a weirdo and none of the other kids seemed like UNC material at all. It was a big turn off for me and definitely made me feel more anxious about school starting. Luckily I met lots of not-weird students when classes started and life was peachy! Orientation is rarely a true representation of what college life will actually be like. Tell your d to hang in there! : )

[robinsuesanders]

ACM,

GSharp says your S will be in Nicholson at W&M. Nicholson is part of the Botetourt Complex. It is indeed of roughly the same vintage as Dupont.

I lived in what was then called Botetourt 3&4 (now part of Fauquier if I recall) way back when in '76-77, and my niece lived in the same building 2008-09. We both loved living in Botetourt and neither of us would have traded our freshman dorm for any of the other freshman dorms on campus. My comments are based on conversations that my niece and I have had about her freshman experience living in my old dorm.

Botetourt does has a reputation on the boards of being bad because the rooms are small and have not been thoroughly renovated in recent memory. The lounges are air conditioned, but unless things have changed the rooms are not. Those are the negatives. Some folks regard the fact that there are hall baths as negatives. However, the hall baths are kept pretty clean and I certainly never wanted to deal with cleaning a suite bath when I was in college. And the students sharing suite baths are responsible for cleaning their own bath if I recall correctly.

And the positives of Botetourt far outweigh the negatives. The floors are small---there are only about 20 students per floor and only around 80 students per building. [Each "floor" on the floor plans actually show two floors that are separated by a half-flight of stairs.] The smallness of the halls usually generates a really deep sense of community in the dorm and it's pretty easy to get to know everybody in your whole building. The whole complex itself also has some sense of community, which is much better developed now than it was in the 70s when only two of the five buildings were freshmen dorms. The common lounge space on the first floor of each building is quite large and very nice. Students do hang out in the lounges. And the complex is close to the cafeteria, W&M Hall, and most of the academic buildings.

If your S goes into his freshman year with a decent attitude towards living in Botetourt instead of dreading it, he'll find Nicholson a good experience, and perhaps a great experience.

[RobD]

Mablab: I'm sorry that your daughter is anticipating a bad start. And that's an awful lot of money to pay if she's not fully on board. You've gotten a lot of good advice so far. I'd say to remind her that you supported her in her application journey and that you think she made a well thought out decision that meets her life goals. Remind her that she needs to have a top gpa to have transfer options and then hope for the best. Once she gets there & classes start, I bet she'll find her place.

The shopping here is starting to just be little stuff; D & I picked up laundry detergent, dryer sheets, etc. today. It was interesting to watch: "why is this box of dryer sheets $1 more than the others for the same amount?" Made my thrifty heart happy

[GSharpM7]

Thanx again to MLH. Hopefully this is right... I'm in my hotel with eyes rolling back in my head (not in the same way that our DD's and DS's eyes are rolling).

Bennington 1
LoisHK’s S

Boston University 1
momonthehill’s D

Brown 3
astromom’s D
L.A.Parent’s S
momof2men’s S

Bryn Mawr 1
Queen’s Mom’s D

Cal Berkeley 1
IloveLA’s D

Cal Poly Pomona 1
gotaplay2’s D

Cal Poly San Luis Obispo 1
lilmom’s S

Caltech 1
PaperChaserPop’s S

Carleton 4
aliceinw’s S
neumes’ S
pmartin57’s D
Youdon’tsay’s S

Carnegie Mellon 1
CaliforniaDancer

Carthage 1
Kajon’s S

Coastal Carolina 1
austinmtmom’s D

Colgate University 1
Pengo’s S

Colorado College 1
skier29’s S

Columbia 1
LetsGoMets’s S

Columbus State 1
musicmom26’s D

Dartmouth 1
standrews’ D

Elon 1
Lafalum84’s D

Emerson 2
intouch1520’s D
runnersmom’s niece

George Washington 1
1sttimemom’s D

Goucher 1
nightchef’s S

Grinnell 1
sDonCC’s S

Hampshire College 1
ALF’s S

Harvard 3
Bubbe’s GS
LIMOMOF2’s D
mountaingoat’s D

Haverford 1
Bclintonk’s D

High Point University 1
KYParent’s D

Ithaca 1
mdemvizi

Kenyon 1
boiledegg’s D

Lafayette 1
BonnieNewJersey's D

Louisiana State 1
Psi’s S

Loyola Chicago 1
mpabon’s D

LSU 1
alexahet

Macalester 1
Cecil’s S

Marymount Manhattan 1
showmom858’s D

Middlebury 1
journey919’s D

Millersville University + CC 1
PAVenturer’s S

Minneapolis College of Art and Design 1
redbug119’s D

Northeastern 2
colorado_mom’s S
pugmadkate’s S

Northwestern 3
FindAPlace’s S
momof3sons’ S3
tboneParent’s S

NYU 1
Mablab54’s D

Oberlin 1
qialah’s D

Ohio State University 1
want2babuckeye’s son

Ole Miss 1
mantori.suzuki’s S

Pitzer 1
mom2sons’ S2

Pomona College 1
BengalMom’s S

Princeton 2
GSharpM7’s D
hopeful12345’s D

Rhodes 1
mimimomx3’s D

Rice 2
MuppetMom’s D
proudparents’ S

RPI 1
Brooklynborndad’s D

Scripps 1
scualum’s D

Smith 2
rocket6louise
teenage_cliche

St. Olaf 1
robinsuesanders’ S

Stanford 1
applicannot

SUNY Albany 1
donnagal’s S

Swarthmore 3
2girls4me’s D
Keilexandra
momof3sons’ S2

Tufts 3
CountingDown’s S
mathmom’s S
momof2inma’s D

University of Alabama 2
AL34’s S
RobD’s D

University of Alabama Birmingham 1
parent56’s S

University of Buffalo 1
coskat’s D

University of California @ Santa Barbara 1
esobay’s S

University of Chicago 4
artloversplus’s D
jackief’s D
motherbear332’s S
PayFor’s S

University of Cincinnati 1
mommuisc’s S

University of Delaware 2
Booklady’s S
zoosermom’s D

University of Georgia 1
somewhereinga’s D

University of Illinois @ UrbanaChampaign 1
BerneseMtn’s S

University of Maryland 1
ELY’s S

University of Michigan 2
hopeful2014’s S
littlefalls’ S

University of Missouri/Columbia 1
CheckersMidwest’s S

University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill 3
almar4’s S
BCandBU82’s S
veewhitty’s D

University of Pennsylvania 1
kindredspirit’s D

University of Redlands 2
missemily516’s D
vballmom’s S

University of Richmond 1
PAVenturer’s D

University of Rochester 1
PinotNoir’s S

University of Scranton 1
1sokkermom’s D

University of South Carolina 1
MomLive’s S

University of Southern California 1
pixeljig’s S

University of Texas at Austin 2
MaineLonghorn’s S
SWTCAT’s D

University of Virginia 5
2education’s S
curiousmother’s D
jc40’s D
jingle’s S
shillyshally’s D

Vanderbilt 1
BlessedTwice’s S

Vassar 1
psychmom’s D

Villanova 2
archiemom’s S
FLVADAD’s D

Wake Forest 1
DougBetsy’s S

Washington University in St. Louis 3
limabeans’ S
PAO2008’s D
sacchi’s S

Wellesley 1
Sailorette’s D

Wesleyan 1
sewemma’s S

Wheaton MA 1
SLUMOM’s S

William & Mary 3
12rmh18’s S
anothercrazymom’s S
Flinty’s D

Williams 1
GTalum’s D

Yale 4
learninginprog’s S
my2sunz’s S
tango91’s S
vicariousparent’s D

Total Result 129

[LIMOMOF2]

Good morning!

It looks like a lovely day here, and feels a little less humid - finally!

Welcome back, mdemvizi. Glad you liked your brother's new wife.

GSharp and Jackief - thanks for posting your updated lists.

Mablab - sorry to hear about your D's change of heart regarding schools. What a big decision for all of you! No advice, but lots of hugs.

CalDancer - you seem very organized, and I'm sure you'll get what you need for school in plenty of time.

So much else I wanted to say, but so little time...........

[anothercrazymom]

Gsharp and RobinSue, My son is basically laughing about the dorm assignment, it reminds him of freshman year at boarding school, small rooms, haven't been updated in forever, maybe even stinky! He had the time of his life in those dorms, he even went back as a prefect his junior year. His senior year prefect assignment was palatial in comparison! He knew he was going back down the housing ladder this year. As a family we have a sense of humor about these things, nothing is going to be as nice as the room at home your decorator mom did for you! Well maybe some of the hotels our little prince has stayed in.

Mablab, I am so sorry for your stress. S's freshman year HS roommate was terribly homesick. His mom didn't want to let S know, I think she worried homesickness was contagious! Our "ice man" claimed to have not one minute of homesickness. I think he was chewing his own arm off to get out of the house and test some relative independence! I know you can't help but worry, I would too. It will probably be okay. They all handle separation differently. Deep breaths and crossed fingers for a happy transition.

[DougBetsy]

Good morning!

acm, I'm heading out for the Girls from Ames right away. I'd like to read it on our upcoming vacation.

mablab54 - {{hugs}} to you as you help your D through her apprehensions.

Lafalum - That camping trip sounds like fun. Good luck with whichever home improvement project you choose.

As always, thanks to our list-minders for keeping us up-to-date with all 129(!) of us.

H's cousin died on Saturday. 40 years old. Alcoholism. Her liver just gave up. No husband, no kids. She lost her job (and insurance) about 4 years ago because all her short term memory brain cells had been killed. She's lived dependent on her 78-yo mom and in-and-out of hospitals ever since. We'll be heading to Princeton (the town) for a service in the next few days.

[anothercrazymom]

DB, I am sorry to hear about your H's cousin. What a terrible waste, that poor woman.

I just found out a friend died yesterday. She was a 41 year old mother of 3, and has been battling breast cancer a long time. She was diagnosed 12 years ago while pregnant with her third child. Beautiful inside and out. I am devastated.

[MomLive]

anothercrazymom - sorry about your friend. Breast cancer seems to particularly ruthless when it occurs in younger women. My BF from HS was diagnosed when she was pregnant with her first child at 23 and died 9 years later.

Mablab - it really does sound like your daughter has a case of nerves. Sorry - that is so hard to deal with - went through it with son for years every time he went to summer camp or any organized activity for that matter. Once he got there he was fine but the anticipation about going away always caused him (and me - because of his whining) a lot of stress.

If it makes you feel any better - my youngest brother (who turns 26 today) literally cried and begged my mother not to leave him at college the day they dropped him off. He ended up loving his school, did great...7 years later he's married and has a wonderful job. She (and you) will get through it. It's a tough time for a lot of kids (and their parents) right now. Hang in there. I suspect we would be in a similar situation except for the fact that son is rooming with his BF (who is a very outgoing kid - the polar opposite of my son). Son is so anxious to be on his own, he's practically dancing with glee at the mere mention of college but he's acting out in other ways.

Am starting to group son's stuff into piles and am realizing there are a few thing missing - nothing big. I was in Target Saturday and the place was jammed with people buying dorm stuff (school starts here in the south in the next 2-3 weeks). I'm trying to stick to the 'less is more' principle. When I look at some of the lists of 'things to bring to college' it's overwhelming - seems like we would need to rent a U-Haul!