anyone willing to look @ my essay on an extracurricular activity?

midnightfire01 · 06-30-2009, 01:30 PM

the prompt is to describe the value of an extracurricular activity, was wondering if i could PM this to someone to get some legit impact on it? the thing is, i'm not exactly sure what colleges want. are they looking for a thrilling, scintillating narrative that describes a scene in time from a particular activity which shows its value? or are they looking for something like an expository statement about the value of this activity and my involvement in it -- relatively cut and professional, simple, and to-the-point without many bonus points for thrill factor?

if some people can look over this for me and give me some pointers, i'd appreciate it a lot. thanks.

vinnyli · 06-30-2009, 01:36 PM

I'll read it and give comments a day or two at the latest.

GammaGrozza · 06-30-2009, 01:42 PM

Colleges, from what I've heard, would prefer a narrative. They always say "show vs. tell" and this is a great opportunity to do so. You want to imply the following things, if possible, within your narrative: why you do the EC, what you do for it, and how you and others benefit.

For example: my essay was about my thoughts heading into and after my final putt in my final golf tournament. It was implied that I loved the game and that I dedicated a ton of time to it. I could have just written a dry statement saying the same thing, but top colleges (again, from what I've heard) don't want to see cookie-cutter stuff.

PM me if you still want help.