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My laptop was stolen out of our room, should roommate contributed to buying a new one

meghanmcgrawmeghanmcgraw Posts: 19Registered User New Member
edited November 2012 in College Life
Our dorm room was unlocked when I went to bed (around 8:30). I left it unlocked because I know my roommate has an issue with bringing her keys out to the lounge right by our room. Once I heard her complaining to her friends about my habit of locking the door even when I am in the room, and one night she specifically asked me not to lock the door while she was out there because she didn't have her keys. The thing is, a man came into our dorm while I was sleeping and stole my laptop. I feel that because I kept the door unlocked for her convenience, she should hold some responsibility in replacing the computer. That same night, I did hear her come into the room to heat some food up and walked right out without grabbing her keys and locking the door. This is a habit I have seen common with her. In the beginning of the year, we would go to bed about the same time and I would always make it a point to lock the door, but noticed that when I would go to bed even before her while she was in the room she would not lock it when she went to bed. Anyway, is it reasonable to ask her to contribute some money in helping me pay for a new computer? When I did bring it up, she felt it was unnecessary and derided me in even thinking about asking her to contribute. I know it wasn't all of her fault, but I feel it is unfair for her not to even recognize that the theft would not have happened if she wasn't so lazy with her keys and with locking the door. Let me know!
Post edited by meghanmcgraw on
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Replies to: My laptop was stolen out of our room, should roommate contributed to buying a new one

  • intparentintparent Posts: 13,312Registered User Senior Member
    Well, it sounds like you have asked her and she said no... I think you are out of luck. I suppose you could ask your RA to get involved, but I doubt you will get any money out of her. I would tell her in no uncertain terms that from now on you will be locking the door if you are out of the room or sleeping, so she needs to keep her keys with her all the time. If she forgets and you are sleeping... I might let her in ONCE, but tell her it is the last time you will do so. And then put the pillow over your head and ignore her if it happens again.

    I certainly do think it is partly her fault. But she sounds like the irresponsible type to start with. You might consider looking for a different room at the semester break... because of study abroad changes, there are openings sometimes. Ask now and see if you can get on a list for that.
  • SingDanceRunLifeSingDanceRunLife Posts: 1,787Registered User Senior Member
    Absolutely not! If I were your roommate, I wouldn't even DREAM of giving you ANYTHING towards a new computer, and I think it's absolutely ridiculous that you would even THINK that it's something you should ask for!

    If you are that adamant about having the door locked, then LOCK THE DOOR! She'll learn to bring her keys with her.
  • meghanmcgrawmeghanmcgraw Posts: 19Registered User New Member
    But I paid for it with my money earned over the summer and only had it for 3 months.. E thing was 1000 bucks... You even think a little bit of a contribution is too much to ask for?
  • failure622failure622 Posts: 1,297Registered User Senior Member
    Get a laptop lock for your new computer and lock it to the bed or something. Then even if your roommate leaves the door open someone can't walk off with your laptop.

    More on topic: Doesn't sound like you're getting any help from her, sorry. But you should definitely talk to her about being more careful with keeping the door locked.
  • romanigypsyeyesromanigypsyeyes Posts: 22,876Registered User Senior Member
    No. And it's not her fault. You could have said no, take your keys. You could have hidden or locked your laptop.
  • moonchildmoonchild Posts: 3,006Registered User Senior Member
    You need to get student insurance, which covers this kind of thing. It will only cost you about $80 a year, and it will cover loss of anything in your dorm room in the future.
    I'm so sorry about your experience. Personally, I would be much more upset that a stranger walked into the room while I was asleep than I would about losing the money (although that hurts, too.) I imagine you reported this to the college authorities, and they should be putting out some kind of warning that this has happened, and reminding students to lock their doors.
    I don't think you're being unreasonable to ask for a contribution. She's not legally obligated, of course, but it shows that she has no concern for your feelings at all that she's not willing to chip in a little bit. But then she didn't care about you in the first place, or she wouldn't have made you feel wrong for wanting to lock your own door at night. Next time, don't let your room mate take advantage of you. If you have a legitimate and reasonable need for your safety, someone else's convenience shouldn't trump that. Consider this an expensive lesson in learning to stand up for yourself.
  • VladenschlutteVladenschlutte Posts: 3,421Registered User Senior Member
    First, this story seems extremely implausible. Someone walked into your room while you were in there and took your laptop, and you didn't wake up? How did you even know that's what happened if you were asleep?

    Second, your roommate is in no way responsible for this. Me and my friend are gonna meet up somewhere and he gets robbed on the way there, do you think I should pay to replace his lost possessions? Come on now.

    Don't lose the lesson though. Lock your door. If your roommate complains, too bad. And now you have an excuse too and aren't going to just seem like an *******.
  • meghanmcgrawmeghanmcgraw Posts: 19Registered User New Member
    Vladenschlutte: I know. I was surprised I didn't wake up when the theft came in the room. My bed faces the window and not the door, which could be a reason why. And the situation you pose it totally different. Your friend in no way let it easier for the robber to rob you, while by leaving the door blocked my roommate made it easy for some wacko to walk into our room while I was in it sleeping and steal my laptop.
  • meghanmcgrawmeghanmcgraw Posts: 19Registered User New Member
    Unlocked**********
  • VladenschlutteVladenschlutte Posts: 3,421Registered User Senior Member
    Vladenschlutte: I know. I was surprised I didn't wake up when the theft came in the room. My bed faces the window and not the door, which could be a reason why. And the situation you pose it totally different. Your friend in no way let it easier for the robber to rob you, while by leaving the door blocked my roommate made it easy for some wacko to walk into our room while I was in it sleeping and steal my laptop.

    Okay, so say instead I ask my friend to meet up with me to help me with something? Now I asked him to inconvenience himself and he was harmed beyond that inconvenience for it. Now it's extremely analogous to your situation. Had he not come he would not have been robbed.
  • SingDanceRunLifeSingDanceRunLife Posts: 1,787Registered User Senior Member
    But I paid for it with my money earned over the summer and only had it for 3 months.. E thing was 1000 bucks... You even think a little bit of a contribution is too much to ask for?

    Yeah...you paid for it and only had it for 3 months...and it got stolen...so YOU should replace it because let's face it, YOU are the one who WENT TO BED WITH THE DOOR UNLOCKED. NOT your roommate...YOU. It's NOT her fault AT ALL. It's YOURS.

    So yeah, I think asking for ANY contribution is not only too much, but also ridiculous. I would be insulted if someone thought I owed them for something like this.
  • intparentintparent Posts: 13,312Registered User Senior Member
    Vlad, I don't think it is implausible at all! Once someone came into our house while we were sleeping and stole a purse and backpack from inside the door. First day of kindergarten for D1, and it was her backpack... quite traumatic. Thieves can be very bold.

    SingDanceRunLife, I think you are being harsh. The OP had discussed this with the roommate, and the roommate asked her to essentially do the favor of leaving the door unlocked. So some of this is the roommate's fault as well. But the OP isn't going to get any money from her, that is clear... so lock up (and a locking cable for your laptop is a great idea anyway, esp. in the library and places like that). And if you roommate is offended, change rooms.
  • SingDanceRunLifeSingDanceRunLife Posts: 1,787Registered User Senior Member
    ^ You can think I'm being too harsh if you want, but I don't think I am. It's the OP's fault, no question. She's the one who left the door unlocked when she went to sleep. Not her roommate. She's got to know that sleeping with your door unlocked is dangerous, in the sense that anyone could come in at any time without your knowledge, unlike when you're awake and in your room...so she should grow some balls, and tell her roommate to take her keys and lock the door. As I said, her roommate will learn if she's constantly locked out.
  • romanigypsyeyesromanigypsyeyes Posts: 22,876Registered User Senior Member
    No, int, I disagree. Doing a favor for your roommate does NOT put responsibility on the roommate. The OP has the ability to say no, take your keys. She chose not to. She chose to leave it unlocked. Yes, it was for a favor, but the ultimate choice was hers.
  • meghanmcgrawmeghanmcgraw Posts: 19Registered User New Member
    Thanks intparent.
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