Fratertnities formal parties

Cressmom · 03-13-2006, 12:24 PM

Could someone explain me how they are? My D was invited to one of those parties where the guest and his date shared the same room in the hotel. They said that sex is not involved in this parties, is that true?

joev · 03-13-2006, 12:34 PM

Quote:

They said that sex is not involved in this parties, is that true?

Formals are just dances where everyone dresses up nice. Sex is not forced upon anyone, but I am sure that the guy isn't going to say no. Kinda like a prom to be simple.

Cressmom · 03-13-2006, 01:02 PM

Thank you for your answer. I thought that it was like a prom, but I don't understand why the boy and the girl have to share a room in the hotel to pass the night if they are not in a serious relantionship, is this the situation everywhere or just in WUSTL? How many of you went to these parties with sleep over in a hotel for all the atendees?

Teach2005 · 03-13-2006, 01:18 PM

This occurred at the school where I attended school and was a member of the Greek system. Many fraternities would have formals in bigger cities within a 3 hour range or so. They would book hotel rooms for themselves and their dates.

I never attended a formal that was overnight. I had friends who did and I can tell you that sex was not part of the equation for them. However, I think that I would be nervous in your position as well because it really depends on the guy who asked her. If it's some one she knows well and trusts, then I wouldn't worry about it. Some couples actually end up sharing rooms to save money so there are often 4-6 people in the room similar to a group trip. They will all stay up most of the night and the bed will end up being where they drop at the end of the night...or they might not even use it if there are enough people hanging out at all hours. If it's some one she doesn't know well, then I would be a little more wary. As I said, I had friends who had a good innocent time at these parties and they were completely harmless, but you just never know. I'd ask some more questions...

Cressmom · 03-13-2006, 02:10 PM

Thank you. She knows this guy, and we also know him very well (I think..), but I don't know the rest of the group.
I'm glad that I found CC with many nice people who cares about others and understand them as well.

lucifer11287 · 03-14-2006, 02:47 AM

It really depends. It is just like prom - if you go as friends with someone you probably won't hook up; if not, then there is probably at least a reasonably good chance of hooking up with your date. If the guy isn't going as friends and isn't some sort of loser with no game, and your daughter is willing, then I'd bet money on them hooking up.

Hooking up, of course, is not a synonym for sex.

joev · 03-14-2006, 09:32 AM

Quote:

Hooking up, of course, is not a synonym for sex.

Yeah it is! What do you describe as hooking up? When would you say "Yeah, me and her hooked up." Without having sex with someone? If you are doing that (saying you hooked up without having sex) you are lying to yourself and your platoon.

lucifer11287 · 03-14-2006, 11:47 AM

I think its a matter of terminology. We use hooking up for most things in between sex and nothing (i.e. getting head) and "hitting it" for sex, we being me and my good friends.

Stain99 · 03-14-2006, 12:08 PM

Hooking up = deliberately ambiguous term that leaves you wondering what exactly wen t down. It can mean anything from kissing to intercourse.

jags86 · 03-14-2006, 03:19 PM

well my frat does a 2 night formal. i'll tell you this - formal is a guarenteed hook-up. the amusing part is when you end up hooking up with someone elses date.

Dima343 · 03-14-2006, 03:38 PM

Whether you mean it or not, if you say you hooked up with someone, people will construe it to mean sex - so be careful.

As for overnight formals where students share hotel rooms with their dates, it sounds very suspicious to me. We have plenty of frat formals here but I do not know of any that are overnight. There is often pressure as it is to hook up with your date to formal events, I would expect it to be even greater if the couple is sharing a hotel room, I would probably go into with that in mind and take care.

ctiger · 03-20-2006, 01:40 AM

Haha. It's funny because it's true. At our mountain weekend its a total date swap. As for formal- this year we're going to Nashville for 2 nights, first night just hanging out, drinking, etc. and the second night dinnre with a band on a cruise ship. A lot of parents seem to think that a party involves beer bongs, naked chicks dancing, and no responsibility. Prom, but with more beer and more friends. And naked chicks.