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05-05-2008, 09:00 PM
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#1 | | Junior Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Threads: 35
Posts: 86
| preventing bike from being stolen
Are there any sadistic ways of preventing bike theft beyond using really secure locks? Like a seat that can be adjusted to run high voltage electricity through it? Because if someone steals my bike I want them to regret it for the rest of their lives. I'm being dead serious here (I hate people who steal things). | 
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05-05-2008, 09:19 PM
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#2 | | Junior Member
Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: St. Louis, MO Gender: Male
Threads: 0
Posts: 107
| Take the seat off, so if they try to ride it, it feels funny.
Not really. You can do stuff to make it identifiable later if it does get stolen, but as far as injuring the would-be thief, I dunno. | |
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05-05-2008, 09:27 PM
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#3 | | Junior Member
Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: MO Gender: Male
Threads: 0
Posts: 52
| hmm, well, whatever floats your boat.
but if it were me...
-hide a time-activated carcinogen-emitting capsule somewhere on the bike
-stay up late every night watching your bike while you're safely hidden with a shotgun crouching behind some dense shrubbery
-spray-paint your bike in a color glaringly ugly enough to be seen from outer space
- plant a small dynamo on your bike to power a speaker system cleverly hidden in the seat playing a looped stanza of the "Fresh Prince of Bel-Air" theme song: your victim will helplessly spend his 4+ YEARS of college with that catchy lil' tune stuck in his head... ...torture if i ever heard of it
P.S. It should be noted that several of these options may impair your enjoyment of your own bike while you wait for it to be stolen... | |
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05-05-2008, 09:33 PM
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#4 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: University of Pennsylvania
Threads: 95
Posts: 1,658
| LOL.... 10 char | |
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05-05-2008, 09:40 PM
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#5 | | Junior Member
Join Date: Oct 2007 Gender: Female
Threads: 16
Posts: 275
| you could roll it up to your room each night... | |
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05-06-2008, 06:59 AM
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#6 | | Junior Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Threads: 14
Posts: 104
| You might end up electricuting innocent passers by who brush past your bike... | |
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05-06-2008, 10:39 AM
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#7 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: CT, USA
Threads: 47
Posts: 3,668
| Quote:
-hide a time-activated carcinogen-emitting capsule somewhere on the bike
-stay up late every night watching your bike while you're safely hidden with a shotgun crouching behind some dense shrubbery
-spray-paint your bike in a color glaringly ugly enough to be seen from outer space
- plant a small dynamo on your bike to power a speaker system cleverly hidden in the seat playing a looped stanza of the "Fresh Prince of Bel-Air" theme song: your victim will helplessly spend his 4+ YEARS of college with that catchy lil' tune stuck in his head... ...torture if i ever heard of it
| Haha, genius. | 
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05-06-2008, 11:04 AM
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#8 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2005
Threads: 12
Posts: 1,308
| dude, i would love to have a bike that played the fresh prince of bel air song whenever I rode. | |
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05-06-2008, 06:07 PM
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#9 | | Member
Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: NJ Gender: Female
Threads: 11
Posts: 465
| do it 40 year old virgin style, take one of the wheels with you to whereever you are going. | |
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05-06-2008, 08:33 PM
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#10 | | Member
Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: NYC Gender: Female
Threads: 26
Posts: 392
| LOL you guys are hilarious. Maybe you should dock at a crowded place on campus? I know in my school no one steal bikes in the school library where people come in and out 24/7. | |
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05-06-2008, 09:52 PM
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#11 | | Junior Member
Join Date: Jun 2007
Threads: 0
Posts: 55
| Get a bike that is not worth stealing and use a bike lock. You don't need a high end bike that you would use for triathlons...you just need simple transportation that you can leave out in the rain. | |
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05-06-2008, 10:19 PM
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#12 | | Junior Member
Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Australia Gender: Female
Threads: 1
Posts: 103
| Take a wheel off and carry it with you everywhere you go. | |
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05-06-2008, 10:24 PM
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#13 | | Senior Member
Join Date: May 2005 Location: Texas
Threads: 147
Posts: 1,506
| put tacks on the bar handles so their hands bleed when they steal it. | |
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05-08-2008, 12:23 PM
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#14 | | Junior Member
Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: CLT, NC (UIllinois '12)
Threads: 5
Posts: 72
| Stealing the seat would be good, the bike would look stolen everywhere the thief rode it until they could find a new one, | |
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05-08-2008, 02:40 PM
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#15 | | Junior Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Threads: 6
Posts: 49
| Just make sure everyone sees you ride it naked. No one will want to get on that thing.(This method is preferred if you are overweight and obnoxiously white. | |
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