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At the first school I attended, most of my good friends were people on my floor.
So I saw them every day and we built up a camaraderie over time. It didn't take me long to feel comfortable enough to knock on their doors and ask if they wanted to get lunch or just hang out because I saw them so often.
Then I transferred, which resulted in a ****show of loneliness, and I thought my fortunes were going to improve by joining a fraternity (because once you join you're a brother and you do lots of stuff with your brothers and can drop by the house any time). But unfortunately, one fraternity I like didn't give me a bid, and I met some guys I really liked in another one....but I met them on the last day of rush and they couldn't extend me a bid when I didn't go to any of the earlier events.
Now when they told me this, they said "you're a cool guy, you should do Spring rush, we just can't extend a bid when so many others have gone to our earlier events. But we should definitely hang out sometime."
So I sent them an email back saying no hard feelings, if they ever had any open invites or parties or just wanted to hang out I'd always be up for it and to just give me a call.
So my problem is:
I can meet people at various clubs and extracurriculars,
but I never hang out with them outside of these clubs.
I have all these numbing, blank spaces in my day where I am just walking alone and eating alone and studying alone and it sucks so, so much. But even if I get their number at a club meeting, I feel bad calling people up I've only met one time or for just a few hours and asking if they can hang out or grab lunch.
Isn't it just kind of awkward?
I feel much better when people call ME up or invite me out.
I'm actually rejecting a bid from a fraternity that extended one to me just because I feel like I get along with the brothers from that aforementioned one better, even if I only met them for a very short period of time. (Not the only reason but main one.) And I hope I can hang out with them during this semester sometime but if I don't get my act together this gamble will end up failing.
I don't know, it's kind of sad to ask,
"how do you make friends?"
but now that I screwed up my efforts at rushing I don't know what else to do.
It's really hard for me to call someone up after only meeting them once but I don't know if that's normal or not.