the only time a columbia student has expressed annoyance to me over barnard is when we're waiting in line in the lobby of their building, because i have to be signed in (bc students can't swipe into cu dorms, and vice versa).
i go to barnard, and i always get this weird feeling when barnard girls say they go to columbia/rarely acknowledge barnard. i don't know how to explain the feeling; i think it's pity. it's like they're too busy trying convince themselves that they go there, that they're ignoring how fab barnard is.
but at the same time, i still feel like i belong to the columbia university community. if someone hasn't heard of barnard, i'll usually add "affiliated with cu"