why are we trying so hard....

maomaomao · 10-12-2009, 02:39 AM

first off, let me say that i would LOVE to go to columbia.

but honestly, i hate how much sacrifice - everything from family to friends to some me time - it took the past 4 years for me to build my stupid resume for college.

& i definitely DONT want that to continue, or most likely worsen, over the next 4 years.

and come out with a major debt.

everyone wants to go to columbia because its so prestigious and all that. but i think a major part of me wants to go to columbia is because i've tried SO hard the past 4 years, and i want proof that it was all worth it (not saying going to a lesser famous university would not be worth it - its what we make out of it right?).

but would it be worth it?

lets be honest - everyone thats applying to columbia, most likely you guys have spent countless hours studying and doing e.c. instead of with your family and friends.

i dont know about you guys, but im pretty confused. the risk of loosing my family and friends even more for a stupid name seems like a major gamble. but if i dont take the risk, i know i would regret forever.

admissionsgeek · 10-12-2009, 09:00 AM

i think everyone faces this question.

first, columbia in terms of an educational experience (the way it matures you emotionally, mentally - and i guess you could say physically too) really is an incredible experience. i really believe it makes you a better person in a way that i don't think you could equally say about most universities. in a sense - don't apply because columbia is prestigious, but rather because the experience it will put you through will prepare you better for the life ahead. so i get really aggravated when someone writes (as you have here) should i go to a less famous university. it is really looking at education in such a wrong way, that i would first kick this concept of fame out of your head - or well, the first week of lithum will do that as well.

second - the columbia name does open things up for you that you might otherwise have had to jump through hopes to get. but in general this refers to things that are very exclusive in a sense. top top internships in finance, policy, etc. places like TFA recruit at Columbia hardcore more so than elsewhere. individuals will look closer at you because you went to columbia, whereas they might toss out another application.

so now the question is it worth it? for most people, no.

if you just wanna live comfortably in a suburban house and have your 2.5 kids, then well you can probably do that going anywhere.

columbia, ivies and most top universities are for ambitious risk takers. folks who want to climb up the social ladder quicker than normal historical progress would allow. folks who think it is not gradiose to say they want to change/effect the world. to that kind of student, columbia is a candy store. tons of opportunities to meet people, do things, be involved. in that sense students do not look at their peers competitively, necessarily, but rather as potential allies in whatever they want to do next.

i have met a handful of students who perhaps thought they were ambitious and were stunned by what students did at columbia, or individuals who chased the name and not the education, and many had a hard adjustment. some ended up finding their own space and the really good thing about columbia is that there are those who have a more 'down to earth' version of their ambitious-idealism. it is not just full of investment banking automatons, but folks who want to change the teaching profession, organize labor, build things for others.

i think most columbia students, at least if they are human, will always question this divide between slacking and pushing on. why do i do so much, is it worth it. and you will have to write that 10 page paper and just have no desire to do so. you push through, honestly, because you believe in something more of yourself than you currently have. and so long as you have that in mind - you will not only make it through columbia, but somehow come out the otherside rearing to take on almost any other challenge.

will you be happy and have friends and family along the way? that honestly is your decision. its a work-life balance you will have to construct. i made a lot of great friends at columbia because they impressed me and to this day excite me about what will happen. i have a very close and supporting family who all came to my graduation. and i still work my butt off.

it is the work hard/play hard dynamic that you might hear a lot about. it is true.

is it worth it? well if you move beyond fame and into the practical nature of the education. is it something you think sounds like fun or not. if it isn't then find somewhere you think is fun.

thebeef · 10-12-2009, 11:21 AM

amen to that

maomaomao · 10-12-2009, 11:14 PM

wow i think that was definitely some motivation i needed right there - everything that i wanted to say, but couldnt quit put into words. my top reason to be at columbia is to be around those that are like you, admissionsgeek, that will continue to inspire me even in the toughest times. thanks

glido · 10-13-2009, 02:07 PM

The alleged choice between family and Columbia is a falso choice. You can go to Columbia and still have a strong and growing relationship with your family. friendships com e and go. That is part of life and part of living in our mobil society. That does not mean that you will be ditching your friends if you go to Columbia, however. You may very well keep some of your closest high school buddies for life - no matter where you go to college. Remember, college is only four years; it will be over before you know it.

There are many substantive reasons to go to Columbia, the students, the profs, the upper west side, Spiderman, etc. If you get in, go.
Don't fear that Columbia will change you -- change Columbia.

seanchl · 10-13-2009, 05:21 PM

I hear so many times about how people want to go to Columbia/other ivies because they are super prestigious and all that nonsense... Honestly if your main criteria in picking a college in name recognition or prestige i think that you have your priorities sorely mixed up. College should be a place where you feel you can thrive and contribute to the community. A place where you can feel physically and intellectually at home. I mean you're going to be spending at least four years there... Seriously what is the deal with all the name-value stuff...

Second I cant help but feel sad that you had to sacrifice so much including your relationships to build your college resume... Maybe it's just me, but I absolutely hate doing things just for college. Pretty much everything I do is not for college but because I enjoy it. Well except for the SAT :P... I think that rather than trying to build up activities for college people should instead try to find out what their passions are and then pursue them...

I don't really know too much about your situation but it seems that you aren't happy with what you've been doing in high school... I mean if Columbia is a great fit for you then awesome, but if its all for the name or to validate how much effort you've given to studying and stuff maybe you should find a better match...

haha and in response to your comment that people applying to columbia are study whores...
i study because i like what i'm studying... otherwise i wouldn't be wasting my time... and yes i like to think that I have a social life as well :P learning things doesn't mean that you cant go out and have fun too... its all about balance like admissionsgeek said...

leah123 · 10-13-2009, 08:23 PM

This thread made me sad

I'm sorry that you feel that way, but really I think there is a way to manage a lot of work with a lot of quality time with family and friends. I pride myself on being able to balance a social life with a hefty homework and extra-curricular load. If you do decide on Columbia, it shouldn't be because you feel like you have to - it should be because you WANT to go there, and because you think you'd thrive there and be happy. If you feel like your misery will just continue when you have a lot of work because of challenging classes, Columbia may not be the best place for you. The thing is, if you manage your time and don't allow yourself to OVERstudy or OVERwork, I definitely think it's possible to go to an Ivy League, challenging school and still have the time of your life.

And like others have said, I also hate doing things just for college resumes. It sucks that the admissions process makes people build their lives around what they think they SHOULD do.

JasonNabilMalki · 10-14-2009, 05:53 PM

I attended Rutgers Newark and it was not for me (too public, I needed Jesus to be at school with me, lol), I am applying to St. John's University and I am really excited about the Jesuit atmosphere. Columbia's motto is from "Psalms," is it a good religious experience as well as Ivy experience? I was thinking about applying to the School of General Studies because I took a year off (military and other reasons).

maomaomao · 10-15-2009, 12:56 AM

i never said i wanted to go to columbia just because its prestigious, or else id be applying to harvard and stanford too but im not. i meant i dont think i can handle the competition at columbia, and having headaches everyday and end up at the bottom.

and in my defense, i never said i had bad relations with my family. i said going to a school like columbia takes a lot of sacrifice.

but thanks everyone

admissionsgeek · 10-15-2009, 01:27 AM

yeah maomao, i think folks really should've killed the convo after it seemed like you came to a good place. but that is the problem with posting, folks can go in tangents.

TheNewHans · 10-16-2009, 02:19 AM

I have to disagree a little bit with you, admissionsgeek. I don't think going to an Ivy school will really "matures you emotionally, mentally - and i guess you could say physically too". Although it definitely has an advantage in terms of jobs after graduation but I believe the education you get there is just as same as you get at any other schools. It all depends on the student to decide if they want to grab the opportunities around them or not.

Aristororty · 10-16-2009, 10:45 AM

Jason - you get the religious experience you want. Generally, in a rigorous academic environment, there are no religious overtones, and Columbia does not have a religious affiliation. There are plenty of churches around; however, they are distinct from anything that goes on academically. If you came to Columbia, prepare to have your faith challenged.

NewHans - I agree that a lot of this depends on the student. But if the student is an opportunity-grabber, she has more things to grab at Columbia, plain and simple. As a transfer, I've had the advantage in seeing difference in schools first hand. It is not superficial.

General note related to thread: those who apply for the prestige usually don't make it through the application process. Its really easy to tell when some applies to a school to leech something out of it, as opposed to wanting to bring something to it.

altruition · 10-16-2009, 07:47 PM

uhm, it's up to you. It's your game and your pieces. Even if a knight is taken by a queen early on, an unnoticed bishop can still take the lead.

original501 · 10-16-2009, 07:57 PM

you have to find some middleground...
sacrifice as much as you want to...
Columbia was my dream school too, until I came to the same realization as you.

Your hardwork WILL pay off...
If Columbia doesn't acnowledge your sacrifice- screw them!
Chances are, some other top school will.

Read my thread:I want your *personal* opinion on this...