Shrinkrap

Thanks all! I should say at least one parent would be at move-in, just wasn'tt sure the whole family (including pulling a sib from sports and school), should go both times. Also my sister and her family are there, and would love to experience some of this on our behalf. Finally, we have been invited to Blue Devil Days here in California which might offer perspective about being far away. It just happens to be when another schools accepted student days is, and we are still not decided. Any thought's about paying full price at Duke? Did your student need to convince you, and how?

proudinnj

Shrinkrap --- personal finances are just that -- personal. It is very easy for me to say that is worth every cent. Without knowing your situation, which is none of my business, I am somewhat uncomfortable going on and on about Duke. Duke was and is our sons' dream school. They set Duke as their goal from grade school. H and I would have done whatever we had to in order to send them to Duke. But that was our decision.

When we visited Duke the summer before they applied, I could visualize them walking along Chapel Drive -- I knew that it was a perfect fit for them. Duke has lived up to its reputation and then some -- that's about all I can say

But keep in mind, if you live in California, you need to factor in airfare if your child wants to come home for Fall Break as well as Thanksgiving and Winter Break

darius

Proudinnj,
I agree! Broadhead's speech to the Class of '11 in the Chapel on move-in weekend was a real "lump in your throat" moment. Very cool.

Shrinkrap

Thanks proudinnj. Duke was my D's dream when we visited last spring. She loved the" feel" and the beauty. We all did. It was our first step in this journey, and we had no idea what an ambitious dream it was. Compared to some here, we got a VERY late start in this "elite" thing. It is still hard to believe D get's to choose. The finances are doable without loans, I just wish I understood better what the appeal for her is. It seems largely related to various clubs and extracurriculars. Her other first choice has horseback riding and a great rose garden....Besides that, both are on the list because of the people she's met during "invitationals".

proudinnj

shrinkrap -- in so many ways it's the intangibles. For us, it's the smiles on the students' faces as you pass them on campus -- it's the professor and assistant dean who took time out to talk with H and me at the Pratt Barbecue. It's the pride you feel when people ask where your kids go to school. For our sons, it's been about making great friends, challenging courses, some "not so great" professors and some who truly care about their students -- If she feels it -- its the real deal. Hard to explain. But it's a feeling they didn't have about the other "elite" and not so "elite" schools we visited.

mafool

DS's shoulders relaxed and his real smile appeared during Blue Devil Days at Duke. Can't say why it happened, but I watched it happen.

irishforever

Duke was S1's top choice throughout HS--by the time he was a senior we simply couldn't picture him anywhere else, so getting in was a dream come true!! (And working hard to realize that dream means that he values the opportunity to go there--that convinced us that we would work to finance it!)

When we visited for the first time on Presidents' Weekend of his junior year in HS it snowed 5 inches! The gothic campus was gorgeous--and he was thrilled to see the tents in K-Ville. It was like the pilgrimage to Mecca!! He has been a happy camper (in K-ville, or any other context) ever since, and we are so thrilled that he has taken advantage of what he has been offered at Duke.

Good luck with the decision! Our younger son, S2, is currently a senior in HS and, ironically, has made his decision to go to that "other" school 8 miles down Tobacco Road! Yep--he is going to be in Chapel Hill for journalism (which they don't have at Duke)! S1 has been great about it, but we will be sporting the "House Divided" sticker on the car in the fall! They are very close, and I think they are excited to be near one another next year!

Shrinkrap

(And working hard to realize that dream means that he values the opportunity to go there--that convinced us that we would work to finance it!)

I get it! Thanks. My D has worked hard, but just "because"..her school is not into "elite" stuff. They aspire to the likes of Liberty and Biola...

irishforever

Shrinkrap~I totally understand about the "elite" stuff not being appreciated at your D's school. We happen to live in an area on the east coast where the kids are under a lot of pressure about the "elite" stuff. But we have plenty of friends from around the country who are in situations like yours.

I know you and your D will make the right decision--all three of ours have been very happy with their choices--she will be too!!

mafool

Same here, shrinkwrap. We have an excellent and much sought after state flagship, and that was, with very few exceptions, the dream school and highest reach at DS's high school. Nothing at all wrong with that, either. For our son, it came down to choosing between that same State Flagship and Duke. He would have done well and been fine at SFU; Duke suited him better. We are very fortunate that it worked out that he could attend Duke. (Though having that SFU 2-1/2 hours down the road did have its appeal to this Mom.)

Shrinkrap

Thanks again! Just to further clarify ( in case you don't know), Biola and Liberty are very conservative Christian schools, not unlike the school she's attended for the last 14 years. We did not understand this when we enrolled her in preschool, but she has done really well, and wanted to stay. She is also one of very few Black kids, and one of maybe the top 5 students, academically and leadership wise. Needless to say, Duke will be a big change, and where she has connected (besides BSA) is with a few Christian groups on campus. I'll look them up if anybody has insights.

mafool

Where we live, there are 2 small, conservative Christian colleges: one in our town and the other within 30 miles. Of students at our HS who do not attend one of our state schools, I would estimate that more than 80% choose one of these two colleges.

FWIW, and I am not advocating Duke for your D, one of the best things about going to Duke for our son is the religious and ethnic diversity he encountered. He was accustomed to much evangelizing, proselytizing and judging in our home town. Not much inquiry and analysis. At Duke, he encountered people who were genuinely curious and interested about others' belief systems and experiences. I heard about many late-night discussions in the freshman dorm about these things. He has friends who practice religions I had never heard of before. (Do you have any idea how many religions there are in India? I didn't.)

As I said, this is just FWIW!

Shrinkrap

THAT was worth A LOT! Just what I needed to hear!

mafool

feel free to PM if I can help further

Shrinkrap

D's sir submitted! Thanks everyone!