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Deadbeat dad syndrome :(

wavylays94wavylays94 Posts: 648Registered User Member
edited September 2011 in Financial Aid & Scholarships
So basically I have a problem with aid.. Parents are divorced; my mom is in tons of debt from identity theft and I haven't had a relationship with dad in seven years. He pays 1100 a month in child support that ends when I turn 18. He makes lots of money and she doesn't. Is there any way I can get around putting his info on the profile stuff? Is there any chance a waiver might apply to me?

*applying to Rice
Post edited by wavylays94 on
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Replies to: Deadbeat dad syndrome :(

  • sybbie719sybbie719 Posts: 16,851Super Moderator Senior Member
    Based on the information that you have given, you will not be eligible for a waiver.
    Is there was a no-contact order on file with the school?
    Because your father is paying support, that is considered contact. Your dad will have to file a non-custodial form.
  • drumwriter22drumwriter22 Posts: 290Registered User Junior Member
    I'm no expert but I think the above poster is wrong...I don't think paying child supportis contact. I have not seen/heard from my dad in 9 years. I think I'll be getting a waiver. Can the poster verify where this info came from?

    Sent from my Vortex using CC App
  • mom2collegekidsmom2collegekids Posts: 62,310Registered User Senior Member
    Wavy....

    Not all schools require NCP forms.

    Since your dad pays substantial child support, there's little chance that you'd get a waiver to not include his info. those waivers are for real deadbeat dads.

    And, you're very wrong to call your dad "a deadbeat dad" if he's paying over 12k per year in support for you. Do you have any idea of what a deadbeat dad is? That's a person who doesn't support his child.

    Your dad is under no obligation to pay for you to go to a pricey university...even if your parents weren't divorced.


    You need to carefully select the schools that you'll apply to....

    1) Apply to schools that don't require NCP info....however, how will your mom pay her EFC? How much will her EFC likely be? Debt will not get considered.

    2) Apply to a few schools that do require NCP info just to see what happens, but be aware that those schools may not be affordable....or your dad may refuse to fill out those forms every year because it's a hassle and he has no intention of paying.

    3) Lastly and most importantly....If you have the stats to be applying to CSS Profile schools that require NCP info, then it's likely that you have the stats to get good-sized merit scholarships from a few safety schools. Be sure to apply to a few schools that you know FOR SURE will give you large merit scholarships for your stats. You can also apply to a few schools that MIGHT give you large scholarships, but BE SURE to apply to a few that will give you ASSURED large merit scholarships for your stats.

    I'm concerned that your mom is going to have an EFC that she can't pay. How are you going to cover that?

    What are your stats?

    Are you a NMSF?





    drum....Sybbie is right. A NCP who pays child support is NOT the same as a "no contact" dad. A "no contact" dad is one where the family has no idea of where the dad is, no money is being paid, etc.

    drum....does your dad pay support?
  • swimcatsmomswimcatsmom Posts: 14,996Registered User Senior Member
    Usually getting a NCP waiver requires showing that there has been no contact and no financial support from that parent. So if a parent has been paying child support, that would make it difficult to get a waiver.
  • mom2collegekidsmom2collegekids Posts: 62,310Registered User Senior Member
    I have started filling out my Rice ED app and I'd like some opinions. I am a Texas senior in the top 6% of my class (31 out of 617). I got a 32(34m/e, 32cr,27sc) act and 2180 (760m,670r,750w) sat. I am awaiting NM notification


    Oh my.....Well, I don't think you'll have good luck getting a waiver from Rice. If you want to apply ED, then do so, but expect FA trouble if you get accepted.


    Be sure to apply to some schools that you know you'll get big merit.

    Did you make NMSF?
  • KKmamaKKmama Posts: 1,670Registered User Senior Member
    Many students, even with intact families, do not get financial support from their parents. Legally, parents are not responsible for children after the age of 18, and some do not feel that they owe their children a college education. Others refuse to pay for that education unless they approve of the child's choice of school and/or major.

    Look for small, private schools that provide generous merit aid, or start out at a community college and live at home. It's not the preferred way to go to college, since you miss the fun stuff of living in a dorm and all that, but in the long run it can get you the degree and the career.

    Good luck to you.
  • sk8rmomsk8rmom Posts: 5,746Registered User Senior Member
    drumwriter, most schools would not consider no contact alone to be grounds for a waiver of NCP info. From what other students who applied for waivers have posted here, it seems that schools will generally need documentation of no financial support, no contact, and unrelated third party verification of that information (ie. attorney, clergy, school). It is completely discretionary, so what works at one school may not work for another. You can google non-custodial parent waiver and see what various schools require.
  • mom2collegekidsmom2collegekids Posts: 62,310Registered User Senior Member
    I think some might think that because an NCP is going to stop support after high school graduation that a waiver should be granted. That's not true.

    Many married parents can't/won't support their kids once they're in college, and no waiver is granted for that.

    "no contact" doesn't mean that the kid and parent don't speak to each other. "no contact" means no money, no anything....basically having been abandoned financially and everything.

    The primary responsibility to pay for college rests with the family. If the family has income, but won't pay, then that is a fact of life that needs to be accepted and other options need to be pursued (merit scholarships for other schools, commuting to a local public, going to a CC, etc)


    Luckily, it sounds like Wavy and Drum have high stats which gives them many more options than the kids with average stats. Those kids don't have any choice but to go commute to their local CC or state school.
  • thumper1thumper1 Posts: 36,876Registered User Senior Member
    my mom is in tons of debt from identity theft

    This sentence caught MY eye. If your mom's debt is due to identity theft and is NOT really her debt...why isn't she resolving this issue with her debtors? If it's not really HER debt, she would not be IN DEBT. We had a credit card fraud issue in this family...one of the cards was used by someone else to make purchases...we contacted the company immediately, closed the account, and filed fraud claims. We did NOT assume the debt made by others.
  • drumwriter22drumwriter22 Posts: 290Registered User Junior Member
    My dad stopped talking to me 9 Christmases ago. He moved to another state and pays child support ($200) some months but not all. It has grown a little more consistent in the last year but I'm pretty sure its so unreliable that my mom doesn't even have to claim it on her income taxes. He will never contribute to my college because last he knew I was the 9-year old girl who liked dolphins. He has no idea who I am and doesn't care. Do you really think colleges will try to make him pay? If so...I don't think I'll be going to college. We won't be able to afford it.

    Sent from my Vortex using CC App
  • mom2collegekidsmom2collegekids Posts: 62,310Registered User Senior Member
    Do you really think colleges will try to make him pay? If so...I don't think I'll be going to college. We won't be able to afford it.




    You misunderstand. No college can "make him pay". However, the CSS Profile schools that require NCP info will require that he fill out the FA papers and then the school will come up with a "family contribution."

    Whether your dad will help pay for that or not is not anything the school can do.


    And...it's not a black and white issue. If you have the stats to apply to these top schools that require CSS NCP info, then you have the stats to get scholarships elsewhere.

    What will your mom's FAFSA EFC be?

    You're in Mich. I don't know if UMich requires NCP info or not. If not, then apply there....and some places that will give you large merit.
    What is your major and your stats?
  • mom2collegekidsmom2collegekids Posts: 62,310Registered User Senior Member
    Drum....

    I see that you're a NMSF. congrats.

    I don't know why you think you won't be able to go to college without your dad's help when you can get free rides for being NMF.
  • sybbie719sybbie719 Posts: 16,851Super Moderator Senior Member
    It has grown a little more consistent in the last year but I'm pretty sure its so unreliable that my mom doesn't even have to claim it on her income taxes.

    No one gets to claim child support. The person who writes it off does not get the write off on his taxes. Your mother as the receiver does not have to declare it as income on her taxes. She does however have to declare it as income on the FAFSA, CSS profile or any other institutional aid forms.
  • sybbie719sybbie719 Posts: 16,851Super Moderator Senior Member
    You're in Mich. I don't know if UMich requires NCP info or not. If not, then apply there....and some places that will give you large merit.

    Michigan requires the non custodial profile
    Complete and submit a CSS/Financial Aid PROFILE to be considered for all need-based university grants and scholarships, including the M-PACT Scholarship, Michigan Grant, Michigan Achievement Award, and any other need-based U-M scholarships. Note: Some students may be required to submit additional documents (such as the Noncustodial Parent PROFILE) to be considered for need-based U-M grants and scholarships. The Office of Financial Aid will contact students by email if they must submit additional

    Office of Financial Aid: New & Prospective Undergraduates

    Pehaps drum should look at schools where she is guaranteed a free ride for being a national merit scholar. This way, she will not need anything from her father and her mother will only have to pay for sundry items (travel, pocket $$, Etc)
  • momofthreeboysmomofthreeboys Posts: 11,545Registered User Senior Member
    * My parents have been divorced for 10 years or more and I do not have any relationship with my noncustodial parent. I am attaching the following information:
    1. A copy of my parents’ official divorce decree or a letter from an attorney confirming my parents’ divorce
    2. One letter from a third party*, not related to me, verifying my relationship with my noncustodial parent.

    OR
    *Other circumstances relating to my relationship with my noncustodial parent. I am attaching the following information:
    1. A detailed letter from me explaining my special circumstances as they pertain to any relationship with my noncustodial parent,
    2. A detailed letter, written by my custodial parent, explaining my special circumstances as they pertain to my relationship with my noncustodial parent, AND
    3. A detailed letter, written by a third-party individual not related to me, explaining my special circumstances as they pertain to my relationship with my noncustodial parent.

    This is UofM's waiver for the NCP information verbiage Drum. It's pretty straightforward especially if parents have been divorced 10 years or more....

    And finally, OP your father is not a deadbeat dad if he's been paying over $1000 a month in child support.
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