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Help with ever deteriorating social skills

CyrusssCyrusss Posts: 6Registered User New Member
edited November 2012 in High School Life
Hello CC!

I'm a person who has a few close friends that I know how to talk to. I'd like to be able to have more people and be openly sociable with others however, I have an extremely bad habit of looking down on others and I have trouble masking these feelings. Is there a way for me to either:
A)mask these feelings
B) learn to ignore them
Post edited by Cyrusss on

Replies to: Help with ever deteriorating social skills

  • CyrusssCyrusss Posts: 6Registered User New Member
    Sorry, the app on the phone is really weird. Continuing on, is there also a way for me to be more "smiley" and more approachable as a whole? I don't look like a friendly person. Thanks!!
  • goodnoodlegoodnoodle Posts: 1,521Registered User Senior Member
    Just establish to yourself that you're not better than anyone and no one is better than you. I understand how hard it is to change people's public perceptions of you. It's not that you can't change but you're thinking about how the people around you will react if the next day you become this super social person. But just make the change. Youll thank yourself.
  • CE527MCE527M Posts: 4,527Registered User Senior Member
    Smiley? Just follow this:

    :(
    > :D

    In all seriousness though, I used to be really quiet, and then I decided to be....louder, I guess. But in general, I just walked with more confidence, stood tall, you know, not slouched over (Actually, I never have done that, but still), and just looked people in the eye when talking, and tried to be friendly. Different situation here, but I think the same thing applies. Just try to reinvent yourself, and be confident, act confident, look people in the eye, and be friendly.

    Why do you look down on people? Maybe if we could understand that, we could help you better.
  • goodnoodlegoodnoodle Posts: 1,521Registered User Senior Member
    I used to be bad at eye contact. It wasn't because of shy contact but just because it was a bad habit I developed. I'm still not perfect about it, sometimes make too much or too little, but I'm a million times better.
  • CyrusssCyrusss Posts: 6Registered User New Member
    I don't have a problem with looking people in the eye most of the time...and I feel like I have a condescending attitude because I feel my peers are immature or ignorant I guess...
  • kikikaylenkikikaylen Posts: 196Registered User Junior Member
    Well, I think the attitude problem should be addressed first and then the outward sociability would stem from that to an extent? Try focusing on the positive aspects of people rather than the negative ones like immaturity and ignorance. Otherwise the only real solution is to find people that you feel are more comparable to you, I guess. Seek out your niche.
  • NortheastlaxNortheastlax Posts: 60Registered User Junior Member
    Well for starters, don't think too much, just relax. You probably look more tense than anything. Also, just every time you want to talk to someone, think of something really funny that will make you smile. :)
  • alexissssalexissss Posts: 2,177Registered User Senior Member
    Make a point to seek out those on your level. You don't need to force yourself to be around those you find unsavory. It'll just be a horrid experience.

    My sophomore year in a new hs I tried hanging around those who were my exact opposite. It didn't work. I had to leave and cut them off because they were insulting me constantly with regards to my mannerisms, culture and morals. I finally found a bunch of awesome people to be around the next year. People I was wholly comfortable around.

    Good luck!
  • logicx24logicx24 Posts: 678Registered User Member
    ^I agree with the above advice. Look for people of your own type, and try to become more approachable. Be more confident, and be generally friendly. Also, learn how to maintain small talk. That's what I had most trouble with; most of my conversations with people would devolve into awkward silences because we had nothing to talk about. Learn small talk. It's a very useful skill. And don't think you have to be completely modest; a little bit of cockiness works (rather well in my opinion), but overdose and you just seem arrogant. Also, stop being condescending, and just talk to everyone normally.
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