paki786

i am not the one to determine but i can, however, judge in my mind.

Newjack88

hmmm the reason why i asked is because i recently hung out with a girl i'm interested in at a party. i honestly don't know her all too well but we are in the friends stage right now and i have a feeling that the relationship could easily progress past that.

anyways, to keep it simple, i was pretty surprised at the party because she did a bong hit and was like, "get me some BEER!" to one of her friends lol. she didn't get hella drunk or high or anything like that. i was just caught off guard and i found myself less attracted to her but i'm starting to feel that reaction is a little immature and that i was judging simply because i don't do those things (parents would KILL me if i ever got caught lol).

personally, i think i should just get over it since i don't think she is irresponsible with drinking/etc. however, i am curious as to how others would deal with this situation...

dlesk

newjack the reason not pursue her should be emotional, the fact that she drinks/tokes is trival

fa-la-la-lena

"It is a matter of tolerance and kindness." [to not judge drug users]

I don't agree at all. "Judging" has essentially nothing to do with telling people how to life their life. It has everything to do with "oh, ok, this person snorts crack. They are making a bad decision and I am not going to willingly hang out with people who also snort crack because then I might choose to make such a bad decision."

I can be tolerant and kind and still judge my peers for their bad decisions. By judging them, it doesn't mean I am necessarily condoning them to their face, but just noting in my mind that they are acting dumb. Sorry to any hardcore drug users, but using drugs is simply that; a bad, stupid decision. Disagree with me all you want :P

People can do what they want with themselves, and I'd never "rat" them out persay. But I can certainly judge them in my mind how I please, based off their choices only

fa-la-la-lena

oh, and I'm not talking about drinking, only hardcore drugs like cocaine, meth etc. You can drink "responsibly," but imo you can never use coke or meth responsibly

classic3020

who the hell drinks?

Narcissa

^like 99.999999999 persent of the ppl @ my school

thelittlemermaid

A lot in my school (except maybe the Freshmen, but I don't know them) drinks in some way, shape, or form. I don't, but I'm in the minority.

We all judge people for at least one aspect of their personalities, whether it be the way they act, whether they do drugs or not, or the people who surround them. It's kind of like saying that you had a bad/good first impression of a person. First impressions are based on the judgments you make about people. Judgments don't prevent you from getting to know a person better. They're almost a natural reaction to others. The real test is to get past your initial judgment of a person.

I agree that judging someone isn't telling them how to live their lives. That falls more into the "preaching" category. It comes down to a difference of everyones opinions and values. To me, drinking might be undesirable, but to someone else it could be fine. That doesn't make either of us a bad or good person, it's just personal preference, something everyone is entitled to.

stevezilla1088

I have a feeling many of you will start drinking/smoking weed before or during college... Both are commonplace, at any school, even the top ones.

aaa007

^"Many" is probably an exaggeration, though I'm no one to talk since I personally don't do it or hang around too many people who do. But though it seems that you can find those that do drugs and other substances quite easily, they are hardly in the majority.

imaginationpower

I do judge but probably because I'm more conservative about those things than the average person. People who engage in those activities usually have different priorities. I don't understand why people do it. They say it's fun but there are many other ways to have fun without engaging in risky behavior. A lot of people in my school drink and some do drugs. I try to ignore it because it just depresses me when I think about it. It's not easy, to me at least, to find people who don't and have never engaged in those activites.

whitelulu

Yup, because it's stupid.

It is possible to have fun while sober. Very possible.

Smoking is truly disgusting. There are no benefits, yet people still smoke, get cancer, and die because of it every day. Gross.

Drinking is just dumb. We have had 3 deaths and a vehicular manslaughter committed by a student in the last year, some were caused because these kids were under the influence. After seeing their classmates dead or carted off to jail, you think these kids would smarten up, but people still do it. Why ruin your life at such a young age?

We have so much potential, what is the point of throwing it all away?

lulumobile

yea i agree with the smoking part. drinking is a personal choice. drinking and driving, however, is not--it affects other ppl too. but i think a small house party with alcohol is ok as long as kids realize they could get caught and don't get too out of hand.

mflevity

I think there's a bit of confusion over the meaning of the word "judge".

Merriam-Webster: "To form an opinion about through careful weighing of evidence and testing of premises; to determine or pronounce after inquiry and deliberation; to form an estimate or evaluation of; to hold as an opinion."

Essentially, judgment can be viewed as a thoughtful opinion or an ignorant one. Most of the posters on this thread seem to have taken the former definition, describing their views and reasoning.

What is "judging" (in the negative sense) is calling them all closed-minded for it.

Anon_Person_1

haven't read responses, but, basically, I don't judge whether they are nice people or not...however, I judge whether I want to hang out with them when they are drunk/high, etc...