Wow, Caveat Emptor. Not only most of your opinions cast a incorrect Jacobs image, but the facts that you give to back up your arguments are mostly false (except the AMCAS thingy, where you might be right, you seemed to start losing control towards the end of your post).
Corruption in staff? Do you have spies on the inside? Or are you just making this up? Probably, its the latter. I have never heard of any such thing. Atmosphere "high school" like. Its a small campus, so maybe that's why you got that impression. I never felt like that. Either way, its just your opinion. And no one is "forced" to live on-campus. There is always an option of living off-campus. People just prefer to live on-campus as its more convenient and more fun. I don't understand what your problem with that. You can say Jacobs has its own "style". Which brings us to next point. The article that was heavily criticized, but is "actually true". Have you ever read that article? It was poorly research. It wasn't just about Jacobs students not going downtown, but a lot of other stuff that turned out to be factually wrong. And when, there are dozens of people criticizing the article (not just from Jacobs), you seem to be the only one who is defending it. Clearly shows that there is something wrong with YOU. I am sorry about your "bullying" experience. I sympathize with you on that. But honestly, it sounds like you exaggerated a lot there. Or are hiding something. Just sayin'. It doesn't sound Jacobian at all.
Academics are tough. Definitely. You working your a$$ off and still getting mediocre grades only shows how competitive the university is. I am in somewhat better situation. Most of my grades were above 2.0 (out of 5). But, I never pulled an all-nighter. It just how you manage time. And a professor blaming your nationality for your grades. I am calling bluff on that. Sounds like another misinterpreted dialogue. And ranking? Its not properly ranked yet. Some websites still like to put up some ranks. QS World Ranking doesn't have any university less than 50 years of age in its list. And Jacobs is only 10! In my opinion, teaching is fairly good (it has its ups and downs). Huge room for improvement definitely. But people who have won international olympiads are here. And there people are going to Harvard, Yale, MIT and Facebook, Microsoft and loads of other decent places. But, not all students are good though. Like you. Sorry I had to say that. Unfortunately, you just weren't good enough for Jacobs. I am being blatant. This is actually a problem in Jacobs. They accept too many people and then the students start complaining. Have you ever given this a thought: a student who was average in his high school is sitting in the same Math class as a student who represented his country in an olympiad. Of course, there'll be differences. So much more to say, so less time. :/
Some of your quotes.
"Just please, PLEASE think twice. If you have any other options, exhaust them before trying Jacobs." (Why don't you just say: Don't go to Jacobs. Please.)
"I know that some Jacobians on here are going to bash what I posted, but I won't be able to see it because I won't check responses to this post." (Like a crazy b1tch who hangs up her phone after falsely accusing her boyfriend for cheating or whatever.)
"And God forbid if you're not one of the wealthy Germans on on the rowing team, you're really just one of the more inferiors here socially. Want to know what boarding school is like? Come to Jacobs." (This ones my favorite. Makes no sense whatsoever)