Non-responsive roommate

Moxymom · 08-06-2009, 04:06 PM

My daughter just found out who her roommate will be. She's approached her on Facebook, but this girl hasn't responded, and now my daughter is freaking out. She's been waiting with so much excitement to find out who she's rooming with, and now this girl hasn't even answered her greeting, even though my daughter has seen that she's been online. It's been a day and a half. Any suggestions?

Brosen14 · 08-06-2009, 04:35 PM

Relax. It's a day and a half... If your daughter has never gone more than a day and a half without checking facebook, she has a problem.

rchhay · 08-06-2009, 04:39 PM

She might be checking it on a mobile device and can't see some of the things. In addition to that, I know some people only go on FB to accept friend requests.

Pea · 08-06-2009, 04:45 PM

This is going to sound strange but I think this is a good sign. We would all like to have ended up being best friends with our freshman college roommates, in most cases it didn't work out like that. Your daughter and her new roommate are strangers and the relationship between them will be better if it develops naturally. It sounds to me like the new roommate might know this. If your daughter's expectations for the relationship are too high she is likely to end up disappointed.

The relationship between me and the person who ended up being my best friend in college started off coolly but neither of us pushed it and over time it warmed. Today I consider her one of the best friends I've ever had.

Brosen14 -- I can't even go and hour and a half without checking Facebook. :-)

TwistedxKiss · 08-06-2009, 04:48 PM

I'm on vacation and by total accident I have internet access. If I hadn't, as expected, my roommate wouldn't have heard from me for another week. There's no need for her to freak out yet. (But I do understand, my roommate took 12 hours or so to respond to my message to her and I was eagerly waiting for it. :P)

Moxymom · 08-06-2009, 07:40 PM

This girl did accept my daughter's request to "friend" her on FB. Then my daughter wrote on her wall something like "So, looks like we're going to be roommates" just to get the ball rolling. She knows this girl has accessed FB, as she can see on the FB page. Maybe it is a mobile situation, or something with a simple explanation. I hope so!

-Moxymom

kmccrindle · 08-17-2009, 01:34 PM

Moxymom, I will share with you the advice I shared with my son. Facebook is no way to start a relationship. Contextual fragments are misleading. "So, we're going to be roommates" is not a conversation starter. Facebook works for folks who know each other better.
A good post would be: There are some things I'd like to discuss with you. PM me your phone number and best time to reach you."

Now, that said, s. has not yet taken my advice, but has swapped email correspondence after an equally awkward facebook start.
Cheers,
K
PS She may also be on vaca or working long hours or not know exactly what to say : )

Ibleedblue · 08-17-2009, 01:44 PM

lol you gotta be kidding me. a day and a half? you shouldn't freak out if she never responds. They'll inevitably meet lol. Just relax. Gosh, I wonder what people did before facebook?

kp24 · 08-17-2009, 03:04 PM

tell your daughter to email her. having an awkward facebook wall-to-wall chat that literally ALL their friends can see is NOT the way you want to go.

Moxymom · 08-18-2009, 09:18 AM

Thanks for sharing all of your perspectives on this. My daughter and her roommate are now in contact, and all seems to be going well. You were all right!

EL_TACO_GRANDE · 09-08-2009, 04:24 AM

this was the stupidest thread ever.... sorry i had to say it

yosup · 09-08-2009, 12:51 PM

^ Lol, agreed. With the technology these days, I guess people expect a response from a FB post within an hour. Calm down, a day and a half isn't that much...

bearcats · 09-18-2009, 05:54 PM

funny thing is...this is the way i always feel after sending in my resume....

speaking of which omfg I didnt get an acknowledgment from blackrock. I need to freak out now