symphonymom

I was a violinist...I know the scene Egos, you know....

I think I did advise Cosmos to be very, very, very tactful. A confrontation might be unavoidable, but the gist of my message was to perhaps put it off as long as possible (until she has found her new teacher) and to try to end the relationship, if it comes to that, on a very positive note, so to speak. People have long memories.

I doubt that this teacher is new to having students move on...but the fact that this new teacher wants her to ask permission before taking a trial lesson makes me advise utmost caution...no one wants to tick him off. And that's the kind of person one does not want to leave on poor terms.

violadad

symphonymom, as you say, tact is required. The occasional forelock tugging and slight deference can help as well. The old phrase "By your leave" comes to mind. Most of these scenarios end very positively for both parties. The pond is a bit too small to create large waves, unless you get backed into a corner.

jazzzmomm

Just speaking as a parent, I would advise my kid in this situation to see himself (herself) as a consumer, somewhat. Know that you are entitled to a comfortable fit that will enable you to grow as a musician. Be honest but tactful, as violadad says. A poor match between student and teacher does not have to impinge on anyone's ego, though a difficult conversation or two will probably have to take place.

Cosmos

Thank you all so much for the advice.

One other question, how is taking lessons with two teachers concurrently viewed?

BassDad

In my experience, that rarely works unless both teachers know about the other, agree with the arrangement, and you are either studying different things with each (e.g. classical with one and jazz with the other) or else you are working with one on a very specific and well-defined facet of your playing for a limited number of lessons.

Otherwise, there are a lot of potential pitfalls, including being overworked because both are conducting lessons as though you were only going to be practicing for them, being torn between different techniques if they take a different approach, and having one find out about the other (remember how small the bass world is at your level and above) with the result that neither will have you as a student. In a worst-case scenario, you could do physical harm to yourself either from overwork or by an inappropriate combination of incompatible techniques.

symphonymom

Both my kids have done this... It's tough to practice for two teachers, but both of my kids really have benefitted...particularly if the teachers compliment each other (it doesn't work if they have conflicting styles). Both teachers must absolutely be on board with this.

musicianmom

Bassdad and Symphonymom both point out the importance of both teachers being aware and supportive of the dual strategy. I'm aware of a few situations where the two teacher approach works well. Sorry, as often, my experience is violin related!

The Vamoses "team teach". Mr. Vamos generally takes the technical, etude end and Mrs. Vamos works repertoire. They currently teach at Northwestern and the Music Institute of Chicago for younger students.

Cleveland Institute of Music (CIM) has several teachers that "share" students. Many CIM violin students benefit from the practice. The student generally alternates weeks between the two teachers. I understand that sometimes the same literature is studied with both, sometimes different repertiore or studies. It seems to vary with the student and teacher combo. These are not teacher-assistant relationships, but two "known" teachers.

Several schools have teachers who have teaching assistants. Often the assistant will hear etudes that the main teacher doesn't listen to. Or, the assistant will hear repertoire in preparation for the lesson with the major teacher. Sometimes the assistant is a grad student, but sometimes, as at Juilliard, the assistant is quite a fine teacher in their own right.

In all the above, the teachers all support each other with a great deal of cooperation.

Cosmos, to specifically respond to your scenario, I don't think I'd advise trying two teachers unless they both know and are supportive of the situation and your personal development and playing. Although, it might work if you had very different purposes for studying with 2 at the same time. (For instance, orchestral rep with one and bass etude/solo literature with another.) I would be concerned about them discovering the shared student if you think they wouldn't like that. Good luck!

Cosmos

Thanks for the responses.

Looks like the best move would be to get something set up with another teacher and then have the dreaded talk with my current teacher about switching.

A friend of mine recently switched teachers... and the way he did it was he basically just stopped contacting his former teacher about setting up lessons and things just ended. I don't think this is the best way to do things; a talk would probably be better.

I definitely don't want to lie to my teacher and tell him that I'm too busy in school to do lessons on top of homework/exams, because it wouldn't be hard for him to figure out that I'd switched teachers. I guess I'll have to give this conversation a lot of thought before doing it.

musicianmom

Good for you, Cosmos! I really admire the attitude - and if things go well, there's the possiblity of learning something in the conversation that will be helpful.

I had wondered if you could finish out this school year, be gone for the summer (as I assume you are returning to your parents' home), and then start up in the fall with someone new. It sounds like you've considered that.

In the face of your courage, I have to provide full disclosure. Years ago, D was given a coveted spot in a popular teacher's piano studio after we moved to a new city. It was clear within weeks that this wasn't going to be a fully positive situation. D was playing at an early advanced level and had had lessons successfully for years with a fairly demanding teacher before we moved. I knew the problem wasn't D alone - it was just a clear mismatch. I "wimped out" - I couldn't bring myself to have "the discussion" with the new teacher who had jumped D to the top of her waitlist and accepted her in the middle of the teaching year. I used the teacher's summer absence to locate a new teacher - and did take D for trial lessons with full disclosure about the situation we were leaving before she began lessons with this replacement teacher. The piano world at D's level was not as tight as the bass world you seem to be immersed in. Since we were not involved at the "tippy top" of the piano teacher pyramid, I assumed - correctly it turned out - that the two piano teachers wouldn't encounter each other and that there would be no awkward situations. I even have to admit to calling the teacher we left and leaving a voice mail with some semi-truths about family emergencies, etc,etc and that we wouldn't be resuming fall lessons. You are a better woman than I am!

nycm

Hello Cosmos, just wondering if you won't perhaps get some good advice from your upcoming summer-program teacher? or maybe your former teacher? (didn't you do a pre-college program?)

Cosmos

I'll likely discuss this with the teacher I want to switch to as well as with my former teacher by the end of this month... If things aren't ironed out by the time I get to my summer program, I'll ask my teacher there what he thinks, too.