OpiefromMayberry

I'm not going to tell you that you'll die from drinking, chances are you won't.

However, because of the legal system we live under, death might be easier. As I advised, maybe bag it for a year or so to clean up your record. The thing you're not getting from this isn't the death from alcohol, it's the getting caught and then making a life for yourself with strikes against you. Mess up often enough and everything, and I do mean everything will get hard to come by...

Want a decent job? a decent house? credit cards? Everything you do that is written down on paper..someone can access for information. You might have blown it already with your couple of screw ups. You're too young to understand what your doing is building a wall of "NO's" in your life.

Want something? "NO" "you don't qualify anymore, our background checks found something." Something can be a job, house, insurance, a new car, credit card and so on.

That's what you're not getting here. You're too young to do the math and figure things out. Think ahead, beyond a few weeks or years.

citygirlsmom

why feel sorry for me....he asked for advice and ignores it...its not petty when the police get you

I feel sorry for joev cause his parents don't show much concern....eh..
but as a I said, please don't drive after drinking, at least do the world that favor, whatever you deside to do for yourself, that is your choice, so why ask> Oh yeah, so you won't be afraid cause you messed up on purpose

got it...

sjmom2329

Here's how this works. One day it's illegal and the next day it's legal. If you don't understand that, you don't belong in college. It's a fairly simple statement of law. You've screwed up at least twice. You probably won't get a third chance, and I honestly don't think you deserve one. There are thousands of kids in this country trying to get into college. It's a tough competition and any more problems like this mean that you may not be successful in your quest for a college you like. People get what they deserve in life, and you should be able to accept the consequences of the choices you are making. Don't expect any sympathy from me.

JHS

Doofus:

You want some accurate, nonjudgmental legal advice about the effect of your citation on your college applications. That's a rational, reasonable thing to want. Here's what you do: You find a competent criminal lawyer where you live, you pay his or her retainer, and you make certain to bring the citation, the records of your prior case, and the college applications with you to the meeting. (Even then, though, you're probably going to get something of a lecture with the advice.)

You have a technical question and, while there are patterns across states, the precise answers are likely to be specific to your jurisdiction and the colleges to which you plan to apply. I am a lawyer, but I don't specialize in stuff like that, and it sure as hell isn't anything I ever had to know to pass a bar exam. With a question like this, and your pretty complex situation, any advice you get on a message board is not likely to be worth more than you paid for it.

Since you posted this on a "Parents' Forum" message board, of course you are going to get some free personal advice, too, of the parental variety. You deserve it. You need it. Your parents apparently need it, too. I hope this will be a wake-up call, and all of you will have a chance to address the behaviors and attitudes that underlie your "bad luck" before they have permanent consequences on your life . . . and I'm not just talking about problems with your college applications.

The saddest thing about this thread is that you -- and your parents; they aren't doing you any favors -- are providing a great argument for why this type of citation SHOULD affect your college applications. It looks like the citation alone doesn't work well enough without that. I wish, for your sake, it was clear that you had to disclose the citation, and explain what you had done to make certain you never got another one.

Chillin86

Actually CGM, I said I felt sorry for your daughter. Have fun in your sad little life of ratting on kids, lecturing children, and spending copious amounts of time on this site.

sjmom2329

It's called "Parenting" -- or, if you prefer, adulthood.

Chillin86

Ahhh I didn't know that spending time on collegeconfidential was a prerequisite for being an adult. I actually don't think CGM is a bad person, or even a bad parent; I simply take issue with the fact that she is intolerant of any style of parenting which does not advocate her tough love/ ratting on other children's kids approach. Believe it or not, there are many parents with very loose standards of conduct that end up with fantastic children.

citygirlsmom

gee, chillin86, its not intolerence, its seeing a kid messing uo and then making excuses and coming here hoping that all well be well

as for my D, she has fun, be she is smart enough not to do anything that would risk her future, unlike the OP, who probably isn't being totally honest with us here, anyway....bet there have more instances of breakng the law, just has been 'lucky' to not get arrested

it is interesting, he asks for advice, we give it and are attacked....nice guy

and yes, my D is a happy camper and has big plans and doesn't do dumb stuff to jeoprodize them by taking stupid risks...but hey, the OP, he knows all doesnt so why did he ask us

latetoschool

Golian, OpiefromMayberry's post is critically important. As recently as five years ago, you could break some minor law, and, a few years out, it wouldn't really impact you anymore and in many cases it would never be discovered at all, especially if you moved out of the local jurisdiction where the infraction happened.

Post 9/11, and with new legislation, increasingly advanced technology and especially with a very competitive job market and overall lower appetite for risk in private industry, you CAN'T make minor errors and get away with it any more.

More information is being collected, stored, and shared about people than ever before. Law enforcement in all jurisdictions have advanced technology and information sharing mandates that didn't exist, or were not a priority just a few years ago. Employers run extensive criminal background, credit, and drug tests before they will allow you to begin work - and it's cheap, fast and easy for them do to.

You can and will lose job opportunities, credit, even reputation and in some cases college admission (grad and undergrad) if you have infractions of any kind on your record. Potential employers will pass right over you because there are simply too many qualified applicants available who DO NOT have blemishes on their records.

And even if some employer decides to gamble on you and you do get hired? And do a great job, get comfortable, and a few years go by? If some other company acquires your company, then, THAT human resource department is going to do a new background check on all the employees in the newly acquired company, and, they are going to be looking for places to cut, and guess who will be terminated first?

But it doesn't stop there. In some cases for free, and in all cases for under $20, anyone who wants to, and who can spell your name correctly, can find out just about anything they want to about you. Could be your neighbor, perhaps the parents of someone you want to date - doesn't matter.

Bottom line - don't do anything wrong. Don't break any laws, don't mess up your credit, etc. It isn't difficult to obey the law and the price is far too high to do otherwise.

golani89

There are two types of posters here one who chastizies me for drinking because its alcohol and the other who chastizes me for drinking because of the risk of getting caught. The first one is stupid and the second one is very sensical and understandable. In life there are moral absolutes, rite and wrong. Stealing, doing drugs, murder, DUI is wrong...drinking isnt. People here attack my parents when they do not know the full extent of the story. If there is anyone blameless here it is my parents. Howdare you people personally attack them. My parents have accomplished more in the face of adversity than any of you here including citygirlsmom( despite what she will say). My parents know what is right and what is wrong. They have strict morals. When I was caught shoplifting they let me have hell. I was not allowed to meet up with friends for months. I recieved lecture after lecture. Tight restrictions were placed on me and since then i havent engaged in anything outwardly wrong like shoplifting. My parents have taught me to drink responsibly. They have shown me the dangerous of drinking, pointed me to family members, and instilled in me a fear of what drinking can do if done incorrectly. They did not ever tell me NOT to drink. They told me how to drink. Notice how in the rest of the world alcohol is not as big of a problem as it is in america despite the lower drinking ages. When i got a curfew violation for driving a minivan with 6 teenagers in it they were livid because that can be dangerous to drive at nite with alot of kids at the time when accidents are more prone to happen, however, when i got caught drinking they werent upset that i drank they were upset that i got myself caught. Drinking isnt wrong and none of you could prove otherwise. Just because some idiot drinks himself to a deathly stupor does not mean it is wrong. Someof you peopole need to learn a send of absolutism in morality and not some preachy self-righteous crap.

hayden

You have a driving violation in addition to the shoplifting and the drinking?

sjmom2329

Golani - It's nice to hear you defend your parents. Maybe you should think about how they'd feel if you had another problem with the law or with alcohol. When you find yourself in a risky situation, just think about how much it would hurt them if you were hurt, and make a good choice.

jmmom

A 17-year old who has a violation for driving teenagers in violation of curfew/restricted driver's license, plus a citation for underage drinking, plus a record of shoplifting is emphatically not the type of person that your reach, match or even safety schools wish to accept. It is exactly the type of applicant they do NOT want.

Whether they will know of these issues is not within my area of expertise. If your "voice" comes through in your applications in the same way it comes through here; if your guidance and teacher recs reflect the person we see here, I don't expect stellar results for your application season.

We constantly advise students who come here to let themselves shine through in their applications. It appears to me that you will have to hide your true self. Not a winning strategy.

If you wish to succeed in applications to the type of schools you've listed, you have a bit of time to focus on cleaning up your act. Which would be a more worthwhile activity than focusing on how to hide your act.

Just my opinion.

citygirlsmom

remember, golani, you were the one who told us your parents were more concerned with the getting caught then the activity that led to, what, yur 3rd run in with the law....

so obviouslly, they are trying, but still, this time, just said, well, do what you want, don't get caught? cause that is what you led us to believe

ps- i knew we weren't told the whole story

citygirlsmom

and please don't try and tell us these are just the three times you have participated in stupid activities,,,you just haven't gotten caught...so when yu tell us you have it under control....do you really?

I would think after the shoplifting thing, you would have been concerned about not breaking the law, but your priorities are all messed up

your loss