Say it here cause yo can't say it directly- the get it off your chest thread

[cameliasinensis]

Here's one for my university counselor: No, I'm not going to Dartmouth because it's the most prestigious school I was accepted to. I'm going because it made the most financial sense, because they have the academic programs I'm interested in, because of the undergrad research opportunities, because I've realized that I do want a coed school, because of the calendar system, because it's just the right size for me, because the skiing's better, because I want to get out of the Mid-Atlantic after six years in DC, because (again!) it made the most financial sense, and because I really, genuinely do believe that I'll be happy there. I didn't even apply to Harvard, Yale, or Stanford, and I don't understand why you still think I'm such a prestige whore. Can't you give me a little more credit than that?

[somemom]

teachers, advisors, school administrators: Why are some of you so darned immature that you choose favourites and even buy into the "popular" thing. IF you do have to pick a fav, why can't it be giving extra time to a kid who just needs some attention to blossom? Why do you have to choose the supposedly "cool" kid? Are you still regretting your crowd in HS. I have seen some truly pathetic and obvious favourites and the adults are well-known in the community for this flaw. From the private school admins who suck up to the money and the one genius kid and neglect others to the cheer coach or the English teacher who neglects non favourites.

Even worse than lavishing praise on favs is the obvious neglect or latent hostility to kids you dislike. Maybe that family has made your life more difficult, maybe you don't click with that kid, but don't you realise your power to affect the dignity and (I hate the cliche, but here goes) self-esteem of teens who can tell you don't like them. Couldn't you be a bit less obvious?? You are the adult you know!!

This applies to publics and privates and all grades from K to high school. I don't care if a teacher has a natural inclination to prefer one child over another, I care that they make that preference known to all!!

[somemom]

To my Ds elementary teacher who told me, with such snide sweetness, that D would NEVER be any kind of leader- I'd like you to know she was not only multi-sport captain with "leadership awards", but also won a "leadership" scholarship, so I guess not every one sees her the same way you did, thank God!

[lspf72]

Good for you, camelia!!!

[cameliasinensis]

Thanks!

[red_dragone]

Dear Principal

Thank you for telling me that according to your mastery of statistics that I was never going to make better grades so I should stop trying to take hard classes. I'm sure this was confirmed when I was your FIRST National Merit/National Achievement double scholar in school history.

Dear Prof

Thank you for saying that I 'appeared smart' but that it didn't show in your hs object oriented programming class. You made me decide never to take another cs course again. I must have been really dumb cause I was waitlisted at the no. 1 CS program in the country.

Forget it, engineering is teh awesomeness anyway

[lspf72]

Dear Person X-
Thank you for showing me, on many occasions, how NOT to act if any of my children should ever marry someone from another religion or culture.

[justanotherCCer]

Okay, I'm not exactly a parent, but since my mom is gallivanting around on the other boards I'll venture here and do a rant myself:

Dear Nosy Parents of Juniors,

I don't care about your SAT scores. Or your rank, or your gpa. Stop bothering my mom with this crap, because frankly we could care less about your stupid numbers. This has no influence on us in any way except to annoy us to no end. We are not going to help you get into college, because BELIEVE IT OR NOT every kid is different and unique in their own ways. If you can't, just get out of my face.

--me

[cheers]

Dear Mr Career Counselor; Thank you for waylaying me, DH and S2 at a graduation party just to tell us that Plumbing is a wonderful profession and not all boys need to go to univeristy. Thanks too for suggesting to my son that he go to his university for one year and then transfer back to the state school. What a clever man you are! The headmaster must be so pleased to have you advising bright boys.

Oh, and I was shocked to my knickers to hear that my son avoided your invitations to discuss his career plans this year. I don't know WHAT he was thinking.....so sorry.

[doubleplay]

justanother,
Geez, pretty upset about people asking your mom for help?

[bethievt]

I don't have time now to read the whole thread, so sorry if someone else has said this already, but my worst favorite thing people say is, "My son's (or daughter's) college doesn't GIVE merit aid. They don't NEED to."

[tanyanubin]

What a great thread! First, to the director of the school plays: You came into this school with an attitude of superiority, and proceeded to make mistake after mistake. Your sets have been horrific. You held the kids at rehearsals til 11pm, and not only during tech week, leading to a drop in grades for many. You blew the deadline for the state hs play awards, so those kids who could've been considered were not. You cast out of favoritism, and I think, a sense of power. The biggest suck-ups got the biggest roles, regardless of talent. You had many kids devastated and crying this year because of your casting. I'm glad my child stopped associating with the play before this year and concentrated on other ECs. She has worked with much, much better directors, and doesn't want to learn bad habits from you. And I will never ever forgive you for taking away one of her numbers in a play when she missed several rehearsals for my mother's wake and funeral. What a buffoon. Next, to the smug parents of the above suck-ups: Don't count on your children having careers in the arts. Being a powerful parent at the hs does not translate to your child's success in the theater world. To another parent, in a different vein: Your child is one of the brightest kids I've ever met. You are unfailingly modest and sweet in speaking of her. You must be very proud of her accomplishments, but you never display it obnoxiously. we could all take a lesson from you. I wish the very best for her and for your other D.

[zoosermom]

Great thread!

Dear Stalker Parent: Your child isn't smart, isn't insightful, isn't kind, isn't anything special at all. She could have been, if not for you. You are twisted, envious and sick and should get help. You have made my daughter's life a living hell and I'm not at all sure that you won't someday cause her harm. Seeing as how you attacked my husband who is twice your size. Did you know that your daughter cheats constantly? Posts inappropriate pictures on her MySpace? Did you also know that she is so desperate for attention that she will do anything with any boy just to get noticed? Do you know why that is? Because she knows she's not good enough for you. People would sell their souls for a healthy, smart daughter like yours but you can't see that. What she can see is that you are obsessed with my daughter who is much "smarter" and a totally unique character -- the hairstyle and handbag thing are just bizarre and everyone knows it. Yes my daughter is "gifted" but she isn't better or more worthy of her mother's love than your daughter is. It is not a coincidence that your daughter doesn't haev a friend in the world. You have made her every interaction into a competition and she has no social skills. The girls they went to school with were nice girls and it was your fault, not theirs, that they excluded your daughter. You see, it was better for them to leave her out than to have to deal with you. The other parents, heavy heartedly, understood. Your daughter could have been successful and happy, but instead she is stunted and consumed with envy. That is ALL YOUR FAULT. Now stay away from my kid and eat her dust!

[snoopyiscool]

Doubleplay: I understand what justanother is saying. She (or he) is upset at the parents of other juniors constantly bothering her (or his) mom.

To my 8th grade science teacher:
Thank you, so much, for contributing to my near nervous breakdown last year. No really, I'm touched. All those lectures about how we would amount to nothing, those sighs of disappointment at our midterm grades (the lowest of which was a 90/100), really, those took the cake. How could you complain about our stupidity if we were the only ones who stuck out your class?

To my geography teacher:
I don't care that your (9 yr old) son will go to art school. I don't care that you took a tour of the Soviet Union. I don't care that you have a prize-winning garden. I dont care.

[Tuition Dad]

What we don't say to the (High school) administrators and counselors: Why must everything that passes through you require so much follow-up on my part? You have messed up graduation programs, lost an application, not finished up recommendations and you never return phone calls. We meet all of your deadlines and requests, can't you do the same?

And what we don't say enough to the teachers: Thanks for all the excitement you show in your classes, and the interest in learning you have passed on to my kids. They are good students and fine young people in part because of your efforts.