Lafalum84

I love stories with happy endings! :-)

missypie

Well, the story hasn't quite ended yet, but hopefully it will end happily. I've already been on the phone with a friend whose daughter went to prom a few times, to make sure we know all the "rules." One thing that she mentioned, that I remember from my own prom, is that the actual school event can be pretty lame. I'll have to make sure they both realize that (Aspies can get quite upset if things don't turn out as they'd imagined them) and are prepared to just have fun in each other's company.

citygirlsmom

yes the build up seldom matches the actual event

also, does he dance? is he comfortable dancing, even just the "unfortable guy" dance is fine- you the sort of swaying and lifting of feet once in awhile

remind him that lots of guys don't dance really well, but just dance anyway

and remind him that even if he feels "weird" its okay, but if his date wants to dance, just go for it!!!

also, remind his date may get asked by someone else to dance, she may dance with other gfs and its oay if he asks another girl to dance if his date is busy dancing

this part of dances is awkward even for the smoothest of guys

and let him know that if he asks someone and she says no, don't worry about it, it is no big deal

when my D started going to dances, i gave them the general ettiquette rules....the big one being don't do anything to make someone else feel bad, if they ask you and you go egad, be nice about it, and try and say yes most of the time and if you do say no, don't dance with anyone until that song is over.

And yeah, let him know that sitting and talking with each other and others is fine and lots of fun.

One of those rights of passage us mom types dream about!!!

And you don't have to buy into the big limo stuff. And if she wants to drive them, that is just fine if he doesn't yet drive.

mafool

Yes: usually the getting ready (for the girls), the photo ops, the dinner, ans some after prom activity are far more important than the prom itself!

So happy for you and yours, missypie!

Grande Antilles

Will you tell us how it went? excuse what is Asperge syndrome? I am not a mom but you know

paying3tuitions

Aspergers Syndrome is a communication disorder which makes it hard for the person to notice social cues among a group of other people. Perhaps they do not read a person's facial expression accurately or notice body language that tells him, "oh that person wants to keep talking with me..." versus "the person is packing up and about to leave, so I should be ending this conversation.." Sometimes they have difficulty making eye contact, or feel uncomfortable to shake hands, so the usual social niceties are hard to achieve and they get mistaken for unfriendly. It's only a social cueing problem, and might be found in someone with normal or brilliant intellect or artistic talent. It is sometimes called "Autism Spectrum Disorder" because it is somewhere along a line which, at its worst, is Autism, a very extreme shutdown of communication with others.

Aspergers kids and adults also have a very hard time perceiving another
person's point-of-view, motivation, or infer things from someone's words or actions. If they ask me to take a walk, and I respond, "Yikes, it's the coldest day of the winter!" they might not understand that I just declined their invitation to take a walk together. It's confusing. Maybe they're supposed to start talking with me about the weather? Shades of gray and subtle social messages get misinterpreted, so it's hard to gain social confidence. The family learns to say exactly what they mean and give clear directions and verbal messages. Unfortunately, that's not how the larger world works, so it takes lots of coaching to learn how to interpret words especially from new people or strangers.

When you bump into new terms such as these, we say "Google is your friend." Also See what Wikipedia has to say about it. I'm not an expert, just an aunt and teacher who's come into contact with a half dozen Aspergers Syndrome kids. With a lot of training and coaching, many kids can learn the skills they need, but it's hard for them because it doesn't come as naturally as to others. Therefore, any social invitations are highly appreciated by parents, and to be asked for a prom date is mighty exciting!

Grande Antilles, I hope I explained that okay, as a non-expert.

Missypie, Congrats and thanks for sharing the happy news

momofnewP

Thanks paying 3 for the explanation. I learn a lot here.

What is the treatment, if any, for Apsbergers?

Missy I hope your son has a great time.

Grande Antilles

Thanks for the explanation paying3tuitions . I am going to ask my dear friend , google for more information