| | |  | | 
07-08-2008, 09:57 PM
|
#31 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 2,316
| H & I met when I was a freshman & he was a junior in college. We knew by the end of my freshman year that we would marry. We had a very mature relationship, giving each other plenty of room for other friends & interests. We didn't get married until I graduated, but at 23 I was more than ready to be married to him. It's been 25 wonderful years.
If the couple is mature enough to handle themselves in life, they are mature enough to make the decision to marry. If they aren't financially set ... or down with higher ed ... they can make it work, anyway. It's always a gamble, no matter when a couple gets married. If they are up for the challenge, wish them well. | 
| | |
07-08-2008, 10:05 PM
|
#32 | | Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Houston, Texas
Posts: 2,142
| Quote: |
aibarr, were you in a long distance relationship in that seven years or in the same place?
| Four years in the same city, two with me in Champaign and him in Baton Rouge, one with me in Los Angeles and him in Baton Rouge. We were typically able to spend summers and academic breaks in the same city, though, which helped a lot. We now live happily together in the same city! Quote: |
Admittedly, if you get married at 23, you should be prepared to defend your relationship choices to random people
| No clerks clucked at me! I guess 25 is old...? Maybe 31 is old; he's 31. I'll blame him!  | |
| | |
07-08-2008, 10:14 PM
|
#33 | | Super Moderator
Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Cambridge, MA
Posts: 5,657
| Quote: |
Originally Posted by beck86nj I'm a little concerned about getting through my first year of grad school while planning a wedding. So I'm glad you survived the experience :-) | Actually, it wasn't half-bad -- in my program, first year is spent doing rotations and taking classes, so I wasn't as tied to the lab bench as I am now. Plus, as a grad student, you can meet with caterers and florists and such in the middle of the day and just work super-late or come in early. Flexible hours for the win! Quote: |
No clerks clucked at me! I guess 25 is old...?
| Well, I think it doesn't help that I look about 18 or 19. (I went to the DMV another time when I was 22, and the clerk informed me that, "honey," I needed to bring my parent to do what I wanted to do, since I was under 18. I have bad luck with DMV clerks, I think.) | |
| | |
07-08-2008, 10:25 PM
|
#34 | | Member
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 879
| S's g/f is doing an internship this summer. It's a travel-intensive department of the company, and most of her co-workers are under 30 and single. They recently had a discussion about marriage and the co-workers' consensus was that it would have been better to marry when they were young and in love rather than choosing to put their careers first. I guess the grass is always greener, but I thought it was interesting. Quote: |
Many marriages are with the "kids" in their 30's.
| Do young people have a realistic understanding that they may be forgoing the possibility of having children when they do that? It concerns me that young adults are so focused on their educations and careers that they don't think through the ramifications to their future family lives. Having children will be very important to most of them at some point, and it would be terribly sad to one day realize that they will never know that joy.
I found these statistics online. The first study is on the Hutterite population because they don't use birth control. Age And Infertility: The Biological Clock: Fact Or Fiction? Quote:
From these studies a noticeable decline in fertility begins between age 30 and 33 and a much steeper decline begins at 35-38 years of age for the female partner. The decline in male fertility are much less dramatic and only become significant in the late forties and early fifties. In these studies, when age at first marriage for nulliparous women was specifically evaluated, the risk of never conceiving for the 35-40 year age group was 30 % and for the 40-44 year age group, 64%. Infertility, on the other hand, in longitudinal studies is less common. For the Hutterite population, 11% demonstrated infertility from age 35-39, 33% at age 40 and 87% by age 45. This population had an overall sterility rate of 2.4% which is exceptionally low. This could be explained by the low tubal disease in such a closely knit religious community. Other studies looking at age and IVF pregnancy rate show an extremely low per cycle pregnancy rate (1% or less) in women 44 and older. In summary, on average women go from a near normal pregnancy rate at age 35 to nearly zero at age 43, a short 8 years...
A second way to "control" or isolate maternal age is to look at donor sperm cycles in couples where the woman has no identifiable infertility factor or risks. A multicenter French study involving 2,193 patients with azoospermic husbands demonstrated a significant decline in pregnancy rates for women aged 30 and older. The cumulative success rates after 12 cycles of insemination were 73% for women under age 25, 74% in women aged 26-30, 61% for ages 31-35, and 54% in the over 35 age group. This was the first time a significant reduction in fertility between the ages of 31 and 35 was clearly demonstrated.
| | |
| | |
07-09-2008, 02:00 AM
|
#35 | | Junior Member
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 197
| I know my story is uncommon, but I got married at 34. Yes, my first marriage. The 10 or 12 yrs before that I was owner of Dj service and typical of most Dj's my primary income was in bars and providing light/sound and dj's to bars. In one sense it was difficult to go on a "traditional date". After all, my free time for such a date was usually Monday or Tuesday morning. "I'll pick you up Monday morning and we'll do it up big" rarely worked as most of the world works Monday morning, yet as a dj, I was always working evenings especially Fridays and Saturdays. Most of my free time began at 3 a.m.
Such a life did open up many other opportunities, dating and otherwise, for a young single fellow however that I'll not detail. I wasn't crying myself to sleep at night wishing I had a wife. I enjoyed a good life, a very good life. I knew me well enough to know I didn't want to settle down with one unless I felt that one could make my very good life even better. I met her at 32, we married when I was 34, and I've had a great life since.
I soon got out of the dj business- at least performing personally, and not long after that a former dj of mine bought out my business. | |
| | All times are GMT -5. The time now is 05:16 PM. |
College Confidential is dedicated to providing the best free college admissions information available on the Web, through our many articles and this discussion forum.
