colmomto2

I was really worried about my DS starting college in the fall. Well, he went to orientation for three days last week, made several new friends(!), and can't wait to start college for real. Somehow, when I found out he made friends at orientation I KNEW he was going to be okay at college. My worries have all (okay, mostly) disappeared. I realized my biggest worry was that he was going to be lonely or overwhelmed. Not a problem. He's going to be fine. Whew!

ghostfire13

Mitzy--I have an only daughter as well. The anticipation was worse than the actuality. The worst part was leaving her dorm room after we got her all moved in. The walk down the hall and the elevator ride was one of the hardest things I've ever done.

It got easier from then on. She loved her school, got along with her roommates, not to say there were no bumps along the road. I got adjusted to her being away, found a part-time job.

However, I've gotten used to having a newly mature, nice, pretty thoughtful daughter at home since early May. I'm scared that saying good-bye might be even harder this time.

lkf725

mitzy, remember the feeling when you dropped your kid off at nursery school for the first time? Yeah, it's like that...except that now they are smiling and waving goodbye instead of crying and clinging to your leg.

TNMom2Three

wow, when I started this thread I had no idea there were so many parents like me. Great ideas from some, but 9 more days is all I have left til we move our last one into that dorm. I am feeling the dread in every ounce of my body. The fact that is he tells me he's bored and "Ready to go" doesn't make it much better.

These songs keep playing in my head....sweet songs but they will make you cry.

Mark Harris - Find Your Wings (see youtube)

Michael W. Smith-How To Say Goodbye (see youtube)

missypie

We have 9 more days, too, until we take Son to school. I refuse to click on links to any songs because I feel weepy and anxious as it is. (But I still have two more at home.)

timely

Missypie, here's something to remember.... he isn't really gone. If he's like most kids, he'll be home for a month at Christmas and 3 months in the summer. That's 1/3 of the year!

GoBlueAlumMom

Sorry for this Debbie-Downer post..... When my 1st child left 3 years ago, the anticipation leading up to his departure was worse than the reality. This morning, my 2nd and last child left (she's a fall athlete so reports to school earlier than the other freshmen). I've held it together fairly well all summer but, as I sit here typing, I'm literally in a state of shock. This time, it's the reverse...the reality is gut-wrenching and the loss feels so much worse with no kids left at home. The emotions are so deep and overwhelming, it's almost indescribable.

lkf725

Sigh... I was afraid of that ^.

wbow

my heart breaks for everyone of you that is adjusting to the empty nest. i wish i could offer lots of advice and encouragement, but to be honest, it's just a hard thing to get through...and each person seems to needs to find their own way through the process. my son is a rising senior, and honestly, i think that this summer's farewell may be harder than his freshman year. at least his freshman year, i knew he would be around quite a bit for the next few years---but it was still pretty tough for me! now, i know that this is probably his last, long, summer vacation that he will be able to spend at home.

i am trying so hard not to think about that. it is a bit overwhelming to think that he will soon have a job with limited vacations--and i'm sure he'll want to do something more fun than visit ole' mom and dad.

it's hard for me because i so enjoy my boys, and i so enjoy their company. i have a pretty active social life, but nothing is as great as time with my family. i am a bit fearful of the new changes coming my way.

mitzy

ghostfire13


Thank you for the kind words. :-)


lkf725

yes, I remember that feeling very well, she cried for one whole week :-)

TNMom2Three

Two more days
Three empty bedrooms
Four years of being alone....maybe more

Somehow I have to laugh at God's sense of humor to coincide the exit of my last child with the change of life. Probably is for my son's best interest to leave now while I ride this rollercoaster of crying at the drop of a hat alone. I guess for both of us, it's "sink or swim". ;/

I watched my 5 year old granddaughter as my daughter dropped her off at our house this morning to spend the day. My daughter has been home with her all summer for maternity leave and just returned to work. My granddaughter held on for dear life to her Mommy's neck. I choked back a lump because I could see my little boy doing the same as I left him in daycare. Now it's hard to get that same 18 year old to slow down long enough to hug my neck as he runs out the door. In two days he will be up and out of my arms, out of our house. He is running towards it and no matter how I try to slow the time down it's coming. My husband returns to his offshore job in a few days and I will be totally alone. I pray that I CAN get through this. It's tough...

jptmom

OMG I am so glad someone else is also experiencing the irony of having a "change of life" at the same time our lives our changing as our only children are leaving home! I am telling people that explains the excessive weepiness. I hope that's true, anyway.

lilcath

The older of my two boys left a week ago for college (and yes, I'm another mother on the cusp of menopause - the timing really isn't fair). My younger son is a sophomore and still at home, but he needs very little from me and isn't at home nearly as much as Older Son used to be.

In mid-July, my husband and both boys were away various places for two full weeks. I LOVED the time on my own, and felt like EN wasn't going to be nearly as hard as thought.

What a difference two weeks makes! By the end of July, I had had my hours cut at one of my two part-time jobs from 3 1/2 days every week to four to six days, at most, per month. Then the replacement position I thought I'd found fell through. What I'm left with is one very unstructured freelance position, many fewer work hours, no office away from home, and a huge drop in income. Now my nest feels empty, I feel useless, and I miss my son more than I could ever have dreamed.

For me, the lesson in all this is that the more productive activity I have to do outside the house where I spent so many hours with my boys, the better I feel. Unfortunately, we couldn't ask for a worse time to be seeking fuller employment, but I think when I can finally find it all of this will be easier (except for the menopause part!)

TNMom2Three

Last son's been gone a week today, and I've only cried one time. Yay. Hubby left to return offshore yesterday, and with additonal security put on my house yesterday, I slept like a rock. Haven't had one moment of ESPN, video game sounds, or dirty dishes in the sink in the last 24 hours. I saw a review on a movie a little bit ago and thought "hey...I'm FREE to go see that if I want". Not a bad feeling. I guess the thing that will help is that I've always been pretty much a loner, even from a young age. Peace and quiet, tranquil things such as flowing streams, rocking chairs looking at the mountains are things I love. I think they will get boring to have alone after a while, but during 28 years of children underfoot, I sought those things. This peace and quiet may only be a novelty right now, but I have enjoyed the last 24 hours. We'll check again in 24 days.

lkf725

Good for you TNMom! Although a little too quiet and lonely for my taste, having the house to yourself does have some benefits. I remember always wishing that I had some time to do a couple of things of interest to me (besides catching up on my sleep). Maybe I will try some of those.