I don't want to go to college anymore.

[ddwyer]

Good for you for thinking about if now is the time.

I know a couple students that have taken a GAP and work with an Americorp type program. It was great for them. Both think that it made them more "ready" for college and gave them some educational dollars -that come at the end of some programs. In one case the experience got them an additional scholarship.

We are all very different so listen to yourself and those around you, who's opinions you value and that have earned your trust over your lifetime.

[weetbixmum]

Congratulations, revoltxo, on your admission to BU. Kudos, as well, for now considering a gap year and for so appropriately articulating your thoughts and concerns.

Having been raised and educated in the U.S. at a time (the 1970's) and place (the Midwest) where a gap year would have been considered - and was - unthinkable, and now having lived the whole of my post-BA/JD life in Australia where gap years are common, I hope I might offer an additional perspective for you to consider. The short, anecdotal version is this: for monetary reasons, I compressed my two degrees from 7 years to 5 and a-half. While I truly enjoyed my education, it was rushed. I knew it then; I continue to consider it to have been so, now. The one thing I didn't do - didn't have time to do - was to truly consider my academic subjects either in the depth or with the respect they deserved. So, of course, that's what I needed to do in subsequent years!

Partly because of my experience, our D is taking a much-needed gap year to re-charge, reflect, work, travel, read books at her leisure and, frankly, from her parents' vantage, mature a bit more, etc., prior to commencing at Columbia late next month. Another young woman from her year in her school has done the same thing in her lead-up to Oxford, although a third, who will be attending University College London, elected to start university coursework here prior to her departure. In our family's experience, regardless of university location, about 25-30% of the young people we know elect to take a gap year.

In just a quick scan of more authoritative Australian perspectives, you might care to have a look at the following:

- from the University of Sydney 'Gap year can prepare students for uni life': News | The University of Sydney

- a discussion paper with regard to the University of Canberra's for-credit 'Gap Year Plus' program which contains an interesting history of the 'gap year phenomenon' entitled 'Gap Year Plus: Preparing Professionals, Professionally': http://www.waceinc.org/papers/vancou...dy,%20Ward.pdf

- and, for those who worry that taking time off might mean one is tempted never to start their university studies (and, of course, some do not), a comparison of tertiary education rates among OECD countries, including both the U.S. and Australia: Tertiary Graduates - NSW Department of Trade and Investment: Business in NSW.

While it always depends upon the individual, I think the reasons you outlined for deferring the start of your college education are imminently supportable. I do hope that you will be able to persuade your parents to condone travelling as part of a gap year. We know kids who have traversed the gamut of gap year travel options, from travelling solo in remote Mongolia for several months to small groups of friends meeting in various European and Asian venues to 'packaged' gap year travel groups to kids working their way across Europe or the States (and two of these are working overseas to earn enough to support their university costs once they return).

Good luck with your decision(s). And if you are taking a gap year, you ought to get the BU deferral organized asap.

[revoltxo]

Thanks for the replies. It helps to see varying opinions on the subject. I'm giving myself tonight and possibly tomorrow to decide and if I decide to go with the gap year, I will do overnight delivery to Boston to make sure it gets there by August 1st. It's such a big decision, and I have so little time to make it. It's like my heart is telling me to take the gap year, explore my interests-take up photography, further my guitar playing skills, learn the piano, take time to just read really great book for the fun of it and than ultimately travel. But my head tells me to go to Boston-it's the right thing to do. Also, I am 17, I started kindergarten when I was 4 and a lot of people that I met at the BU orientation turn 19 before I turn 18, so me taking a year off wouldn't really put me behind so much. I would graduate when I'm 22. I love that Australia and the UK encourages the gap year, it's just not as popular here in the US.

OH and yes, BU will cost me 25000 per year, but like I said, my parents are helping. They're taking out the parent loan, I'm taking out the student loan. I feel like I should only go to BU next year if I really feel like it's right. I don't want to throw 25,000 down the drain.

I'm off to make my pros and cons list and just relax and think. I appreciate all of the responses, it truly does help.

[collegegal54321]

I think that you are very mature for your age, and that might be part of why you are feeling this way. I'm the same way.

I totally understand your "burned out" feeling-I've dealt with the same thing. I worked so hard in high school, especially the last couple of years. My junior year was difficult-I was taking a lot of IB classes, was in clubs, and then to top it off I had mono most of the year. I had no study halls either. I took a couple of weeks off the summer before senior year, and then I got a job. I worked at my job my entire senior year-some weeks I was working 30 hours. I still had all of those IB classes, I had to apply to college, and for the beginning of the year I still had to deal with the lingering effects of being sick. I thought once I got done with applying to schools it would get easier, but it didn't. My application for my top choice school basically got messed up (and no it was not my fault, it was the school's). On top of dealing with that stress, my job was super stressful. Let's just say I was barely hanging on through most of the year.

I ended up deciding to apply to a community college. I know everybody just hates the idea of that, I was one of those people at first. I thought that I had worked so hard, NO WAY was I going to a school for "bad students" and "slackers" (now I see how ignorant I was). But I just had to suck it up, look at the negatives and positives of my situation, and make the best decision for me that I thought I could make. At first a lot of people looked down on me for my decision, but now I feel that I made a good choice. I'll be saving money, and I can live at home (I wasn't too keen on the whole dorm and partying idea). I ended up getting scholarships to pay for my entire first year, and I'm hoping to get some for next year as well. I even was able to take this summer off (I quit my crappy job) and relax a little bit before college since I got the scholarships.

I guess what I'm trying to say here, is you need to decide what you think is the best decision for you. Don't do what everyone else tells you to do, just because they tell you to. Like I said, everyone told me "don't go to the community college" but now that I'll have really low student debts when I'm done, and they'll have $150k+, they tell me I was smart. Even the doctors I know are telling me I made a really smart move. You have to do what you think is the best for you, and it will all work out.

You seem really set on going to BU, but is there any way you would consider going to even a local state school? (I'm not going to push the community college thing on you, because 99% of the people on here seem against those). You could go part time, work a little, travel some. Maybe even do some internships and figure out what you want to do? No offense or anything, but I thought I read you didn't know what you wanted to do yet, and that's ok, even a lot of adults don't. If you still aren't sure, is it worth it to shell out all of that money a year? I've known kids who think they want to be engineers, but figure out their passion is music their last semester of college. They're waitressing in NYC, with an almost complete engineering degree under their belt, with a bunch of school debt.

I'm sorry for the super long post, I got rambling there. Basically, just go with what your gut is telling you. From what you've said, I would take a gap semester and think about things a little. I hope I helped at least somewhat.

Btw, just saw this post is from about a week ago, so I might be too late with my response. Did you end up deciding?

[polarscribe]

Originally Posted by pacheight

I can't think of a state school, including cal, that will provide as good an education as bu

Then you're just not thinking very clearly.

[momofthreeboys]

Also, I am 17

That is young. Two of my boys headed off to college at 18+ and the youngest will be 19 when he leaves. I'm with the parent(s) who say to call the school tomorrow and as you can see there are very much varied opinions. Ask if you can defer for a year and maintain any scholarships. There is absolutely nothing wrong with taking a breather for year, entering next year with an entire class of kids most of whom will be your age and a whole new attitude. It will also give you a breather to contemplate more what it is you want from the college experience, never a bad thing. Too often kids get caught up in the frenzy or their parents get caught up in the frenzy of high school boom then college. Parents worry that the kids will never go to college if they don't go right after high school. My feeling is that kids will go when they are committed and feel the need to go. There is no law that says you must head out 3 months after you graduate from high school and life is a long haul not a short sprint.

The most successful college students aren't always the ones that did the best in high school...successful students are the students that understand why they are there and have their heads wrapped around that particular experience and can savor and appreciate the experience. For a few it's 17, for many it's 18 and many more are 19 or 20 or 21 or older.

[revoltxo]

Thanks everyone. For anyone who cares to know, I've decided on taking the gap year. Most people think I've gone completely crazy, but deep now I feel like I made the right choice. I have a job lined up for the first semester and I have some goals I plan on completing by the end of the year. I am trying to decide the best way to travel next semester but I will figure it out. Once everything is all planned and organized, I think I will feel even better with my decision. Obviously there are doubts, especially when I hear how happy my friends are to be going off to college in the next few weeks, but I'm sure I'll get through it all. Again, I appreciate all of the insight, it made my decision easier.

OH, and BU accepted this deferment and I am getting in touch with financial aid to discuss everything.

[DeskPotato]

Good for you.

Have a great year.

[OhioMom3000]

You have very valid points and I totally understand your position. Trust your instincts. Best of luck to you!

[momofthreeboys]

Have a great year, take a breather and see where you are early next summer. I'm betting you'll be ready to head off to college then! At the very least a year off from academics will be liberating and will only add to your perspective regarding college.

[GeekMom63]

Congratulations. Now move on, do your best, and no regrets!

[glido]

The economy is in the dumpster right now. There are not a lot of jpbs for h.s. kids. It is a good time to be in school, so you can hit the ground running when the economy heats up. Suck it up. Go to school. There are a lof of kids that wish they had your opportunities. Snap out of it.

[bopambo]

Have a great year! You've made a big decision in a mature way. Don't listen to the nay sayers, it's your life to live.

[weetbixmum]

Hi revoltxo, thanks for giving us an update. It sounds like you have some great plans to kick off your gap year and, hopefully, it will pan out just the way you want.

It's entirely natural to have some second thoughts, especially when the path you've chosen is outside the 'cultural norm'. Again, everyone is different and everyone has their own circumstances to consider, nevertheless, for what it's worth, my observations of my daughter and her extended circle of first-year university aged friends are these:

(1) of the young people who commenced college straight away, a percentage assuredly should have taken a gap year. I think now that the second semester of the Australian university academic year is underway that even their parents would agree with this (again, mine is a single anecdotal perspective, but the parents of a lot of these young people seemed to be concerned that if their children didn't commence university straight away that they'd never go or that they'd have too much time on their hands or somesuch). Unfortunately, whether in rebelling against these (distrusting?) attitudes or for a multitude of other reasons, this group - which isn't a large percentage, but isn't a negligible number either - has been battling academically with the lack of structure and reduced number of scholastic contact hours and/or is having difficulty handling the transition to a more adult social life (in Australia, the legal drinking age is 18 and some are mesmerised by the effects, although most aren't so enamoured after the first 4-5 university weeks) - and often both;

(2) of the young people who commenced college straight away, a more significant percentage may be battling the academic and social issues (and, frankly, everyone does to a greater or lesser degree - it would be surprising if various issues didn't arise, actually), but are really concerned about their majors (in Australia, one commences one's major immediately from secondary school). This group is now needing to recalibrate and go through the hard work of considering and locating new academic directions, all while trying to keep up with their studies in areas they have discovered they aren't very fond. Everyone is sympathetic, but it is difficult and it effectively means adding another semester or two to one's degree time. It's hard to say, but maybe if they'd had more time earlier, these young people might have made different decisions at the outset of their university careers;

(3) unquestionably though, the majority of young people who commenced college straight away are extremely pleased with their academic directions and are making their academic and social transitions reasonably comfortably.

Of the 25-30% of my daughter's friends (as well as my daughter) who are in the midst of their gap years, one of the many purposes for taking this time does seem to be being filled: it seems to me that about four or five months after starting the gap (and they've all been working - some while travelling and some in anticipation of travelling, which is starting about now), they all seem to be volunteering some variant of 'I'm ready to start uni now' or 'I've been thinking about x and I can't wait to get stuck in'. In other words, it seems - like you - they needed some time to truly consider their choices. Hopefully when they actually commence their studies the depth and breadth of their gap year experiences will be of assistance. If nothing else, they'll have made some fascinating memories.

I wish you the best of luck in your year's endeavours. If one can't take this kind of time now, when can you? I hope you have a ball.

[HImom]

I too hope you have a wonderful time & congratulate you on getting a job with this challenging economy! Gap years (like everything else) are what you make of them. It sounds like you have made some good plans and have some ideas that you will work out.

I would really urge you & your family to go & talk with the bank and/or other financial advisors you know and trust about taking on $25K/year for 4 years or $100,000 for your undergraduate education--whether you & your family would even qualify for it and alternatives. That is a LOT of money and as you noted previously will weigh down many of the options open to you upon graduation.