Parent Teacher Conferences (high school) Limited to 5 minutes

[toledo]

This was a true conference night. Meet the teachers/open house was at the beginning of the year. This is optional and I had to request certain teachers. Also, I wouldn't have requested a conference if I thought my student was doing just fine. Do people go to conferences to hear how wonderful their students are doing? Maybe you're the ones who say 5 minutes is enough.

[TheGFG]

The way our middle school and high school used to do things made sense, in my opinion. They'd have the open house night where you follow your child's schedule, meet the teachers, and get an overview of each class. Conferences were designed for parents of students who were struggling. Each child would bring home a letter and if any teacher checked off the square next to their name, then they were requesting a meeting with the parent at their convenience on a walk-in basis during the designated times. Otherwise, you didn't show up unless you were the fawning, schmoozing type of parent.

Now there's the speed dating style. All the teachers sit in a large room at tables and you wait in a row chairs a few feet back for your turn to approach the table. This style would have been fine with my older kids, but not my younger. For one thing, when the Child Study Team noticed your turn at a table approach, they'd come to the table to listen in. So everyone and their brother in the auditorium now would know your kid was a special education student. Ugh. Also, they began to place "like" teachers together, like the literature teacher with the language teacher (since they sometimes collaborate), and the math teacher with the science teacher. I also dislike this, because I see no reason why, when D is acing Mr. Smith's class, for Mr. Smith to hear about the geometry test D just failed in Mrs. Jones' class. And if I have an issue with Mr. Smith, I don't feel free to discuss it in front of Mrs. Jones. Also, the other parents are sitting within earshot, so everyone can hear most of what if being said if they want to listen. That is wrong.

And while theoretically parents are free to set up private appointments, in practice that is discouraged. Teacher make it clear that there was a time set aside for conferences and all but the super serious things should be taken care of then. Also, the teachers are paid for the organized conferences in their contract. They aren't paid for a random Thursday at 4 PM. and some resent having to do it then.

[QuantMech]

The local hs had the arrangement where the teachers had small tables, arranged alphabetically in the gymnasium and the cafeteria, which had a connecting door. There was no bell ringing, but the "conferences" tended to be pretty short. I would guess that they were 5 minutes on average. There were long lines for some of the teachers, but one could generally find one of the teachers whose line was not too long, and then circle back to the others. The hs conferences were offered on 3 different nights, within a 2-week period. Unexpectedly to me, as a lifelong member of the Guild of Procrastinators, most people came one of the first two nights, and the third night had little attendance.

I went for several reasons. For one, "parental involvement," as assessed by the % of parents showing up for the conferences, was one of the measures used in rating the schools in our state. It was pretty clearly important to the administrators to have the parents show up. For a second, some of the conferences were interesting, in terms of the discussion. For a third, one could gain a sense of the fit between the teacher's personality and the student's personality, as well as the teacher's view of the student. Fourth, in schools such as ours, where it is not possible to see any of the college recommendations, I think it is possible to form some opinions on good recommenders vs. weaker choices, by getting a sense of the level of enthusiasm for the student.

I don't fawn very effectively, and I keep confusing schmoozing with snoring.

[QuantMech]

One other difference or two, and a concurrence with TheGFG's post: No chairs were available at our conferences; everyone stood in line. Since the teachers were alphabetical, and there was no teaming at hs level, I never encountered the situation where teacher X was close enough to overhear the conference with teacher Y.

In agreement with TheGFG, there was no privacy at all. I think the conferences probably constituted a FERPA violation, due to this arrangement.

Personal guess: The lack of privacy was intentionally designed to keep the parents in line. Parents were never going to be critical of the instructional methods in a setting like that, nor would they express other complaints. [Cue the Gilbert & Sullivan chorus: "What, never?" "Well hardly ever."]

In most cases, I was very happy with the teaching, and QMP was doing fine. However, I would really have liked to have a greater level of privacy. And it was extremely awkward to pretend to be looking all around the auditorium while the work of a student who did have academic problems was being discussed about a yard in front of me. I think it would be quite hard for the parents of a special ed student.

[emeraldkity4]

Mostly older Ds school had social events for parents.Lots of parent/teacher potlucks - around the perimeter of the room the teachers would be situated with info from their classes ( books, posters, etc), & you could ask them questions while drinking wine!
( its a small private school)
But I don't remember actually going into all of her classrooms the way I did during the open houses at her sisters school. First, to the auditorium to hear the principal introduce staff, then we followed our Ds schedule to her classrooms, spending about 15 minutes in each with just a few minutes for passing. Senior year her classes were third floor- first floor- third floor- second floor- third floor

That was bad, but it didnt take me as long as when she was a freshman, and one of her classes was on the third floor that you only could get to from a certain stairway, but I wasn't the only one who was lost.
I miss that building. They've remodeled extensively, not most of the exterior, but the interior has lost its extensive charm IMO. ( my mother also attended the same high school)

Oh I just remembered- older D did have parents going around to their child's classrooms ( which is also a great way to meet other parents), I just had a vision of the father of one of her friends ( who is a local engineering/medical prof) come bursting in the room about 5 min late when the room was quiet as we were listening to the teachers explanation of what they were doing in class. He exclaimed " It's not my fault!", & from the look on the teachers face, I got the idea his son used that excuse a lot!

& I just remembered another teacher at the same school( who also has taught at the War College) verifying my daughters report that he " bowls" kittens!

[Minnymom]

Our high school does not offer structured conferences. I am very happy with electronic grade book/ course communication- School Loop. The high school has a Back To School Night about a week after the term starts to meet the teachers and form an impression of them.

I am an elementary school teacher and our district has eliminated conference time. If I choose to schedule conferences with parents, I must carve out my own time to get them done. E-mail has become my primary communication tool as both a teacher and a parent.

[Agentninetynine]

DH and I have had to advocate for our children from day one so attending conferences has always been high on our list.

Just had conferences a few weeks ago at DD's school. I like to meet the teachers and get a feel for the interaction between student and teacher (the school encourages the student to attend with parents).

This has been very instructive. Last year I discovered that DD's french teacher didn't know my daughter's name (despite she is the only one in her class of 25 with a french name) and thought DD was in her spanish class! And DD is one of the top students in her class.
Shortly after the conference, the teacher learned DD's name and their interactions became far more frequent.

I also like to chat with the teachers about their syllabus' and plans for future classes. Most are happy to talk and are glad a parent is interested.

[cromette]

This DOES sound more like a meet the teacher. You can't really have a meaningful conference where resolutions are reached in 5 minutes. I would email the teacher, and if need be, set an appointment to come in privately. Our teachers have conference hours every day for meeting with parents privately. And that's a public school.

[MaineLonghorn]

I'd already had a long 504 meeting with my son's teachers in September. I figured this set of conferences was just to get a quick read on how he's doing. Surprisingly well! One teacher said, "He is the politest person I've ever met." I refrained from saying, "Are you KIDDING ME????"

[oldfort]

Half an hour to meet with the advisor. We got a copy of every subject teachers' write up of our kid. If we wanted to we could set up a meeting with those suject teachers.

[Gottagoworkout]

What do parents expect to get from these general teacher conferences? What is privacy needed for? Yu don't think the teachers talk? They have to.

Our teacher nights were follow the students schedule. Some parents were real pain the behinds. Hogging teachers attention, asking the most inane questions, and generally just being annoying.

And they thought their kids were gods gift to earth. I enjoyed it but did not expect personal attention on these nights. Didn't need to have one on one ohnhow wonderful do you think my kid is conversation.

To those that want more time, what exactly are you looking for? And what do you expect your kids todo for the,selves?

[QuantMech]

The teachers probably do talk to each other, but they probably don't talk as much about the students as you'd think. I wouldn't expect a teacher to talk to a different parent about my student, in any case. However, the other parents can easily overhear the conversations at the "warehouse" conferences in the gym.

We also have the follow-the-student's-schedule evening. No one I know expects individual attention at those.

With regard to having more time at the 5-minute conferences, there were a few cases where I would have liked to have more time. For example, if a teacher observed that a girl was quite during class discussions, it would have been nice to explain that permitting vulgar comments by boys during the discussions tended to make some of the girls quieter. In a university setting, remarks of the type made by the boys would be construed as creating an inappropriate, hostile environment. In a 5-minute hs conference, I found it hard to say this, especially when the remark came up at 4 min 45 sec. Since the teacher was inexperienced, I didn't want to seem to be making excuses, or to be confrontational, though I could have offered the specifics. If I had had the chance to bracket this comment with remarks about things I liked, I would have done it, but that would have taken appreciably longer.

Yes, there are a lot of things that students should do for themselves. However, to take an extreme example, several years before QMP was in high school, a boy in an algebra class poured gasoline on another boy, during class. I don't think it's within the normal bounds of what students should be expected to do for themselves, to compel another student not to pour gasoline on them.

I mention this extreme example, because I think that some parents would think that the girls should stand up for themselves, when vulgar comments are being made. However, I really consider that to be the responsibility of the teacher--similarly to it being the teacher's responsibility to prevent one student from pouring gasoline on another during class.

[TheGFG]

D just brought home this year's conference info. A new feature for 2012-2013 is the principal will now announce the measly 5 minute intervals we're allowed. Do these labor-saving ideas get published in the educational journals or something, seeing as so many schools are adopting the same practices? In my opinion, our district schools are already too dismissive of parents and their input and this just adds to the rudeness. They love to remind the middle school parents especially that they're the professionals and we should trust them. The kids need to be responsible as well for their own education they say. Yet how quick they are to blame the parents if the child doesn't learn! Must be the home life, must be the parents lack of education or low socio-economic status, must be the lack of parental involvement, etc.

I am not feeling too charitable toward our teachers at the moment because of the unprofessional way in which they attempt to lobby the children regarding contract negotiations. They all wear black to school, or they all wear ribbons. When my eldest was this age, one of his teachers told the kids that their fight for fair treatment is akin to what MLK did in civil rights movement! Can't stand it. You would think that in a contract renewal year they'd want to go above and beyond to show the parents they deserve more money. But they do less.

[QuantMech]

I think it is not so much labor-saving as it is controlling the parents.

[TheGFG]

Well, 5 minute conferences take less time than 20 minute conferences. Also, I love how we have early dismissal all week ostensibly for conferences, yet they're cramming them all into two hours on two afternoons, and one evening for 4 hours.

I did hear that one reason behind putting everyone in the gym or cafeteria instead of letting parents go to the individual classrooms, is there will be less work for the custodians.