Class of 2012 Results: Celebrate, discuss, support here

[vicariousparent]

mamma11: Congratulations!!! I remembered you from some provocative statements you had made about E.C's:

>>>Who on earth would be proud of their kid being programmed to the hilt with only enough time to "get the A" and not enough time to go deep with the material, take risks on the assignments, put the learning first instead of just an item on the daily list to be efficiently marked off? My kids aren't terribly busy - they don't do sports or performing arts. They do a few things that interest them but mostly they enjoy their classes, read a lot, talk to friends, enjoy life. Sheesh>>

I am happy for you and of course your kid. Good to know that some kids can get in without doing sports or performing arts. Good decision, to let your kids be unabashed scholars (nerds) if that is their passion.

[mammall]

^ It isn't easy being a parent of an "unabashed nerd" but we do feel happy with the outcome - just sheepish about her applying so widely - honestly thought her chances were slim everywhere, as did her GC so she applied just about everywhere to increase her odds. Now this. A good problem to have. I'll be back for more advice from the wise and wonderful parents on CC.

P.S. DD1 says this was the year to have the perfect scores - made it easier for the schools swamped with so many applications to pluck you out and give you a good look. Maybe won't be the same type of hook in coming years.

[binx]

Soozie - thanks. I didn't really post about either S in the admissions process because the absolutely wonderful part about applying to grad schools is that I had nothing to do with it! Both kids sent personal statements to me for editing, but other than that, nada.

S1 withdrew his other aps (or didn't finish; I'm not sure) once he got the Georgetown acceptance, since that is what he wanted. Being an economist, he knows exactly what his budget will be for the next 3 years.

S2 has a tougher decision. I talked at length with him yesterday, helping him weigh options, but making it clear that it's his nickel (and then some) so it will be his decision. His scholarship is a few thousand short of tuition, and he still has to cover living expenses. We hate to see him take too much in loans, so he needs to figure out how cheaply he can live, and how many gigs he can expect. He still is waiting for word from another school, and may choose to appeal for more aid, or take a year off. Ideally, he'd just get a job, but that's much easier said than done.

We're just hoping that whatever he needs to do will become very clear to him.

[Dad II]

We have heard from all 8 schools DD applied. We are going to visit 3 ~ 4 of them and let her make a decision with $$ as a big factor.

There are two strategic mistakes we made in this process – underestimated our EFC and overestimated the probability of getting merit aids. We should have applied to several schools that offer merit aids.

This has been a long journey that has been full of ups and downs. I would like to take this opportunity to express my sincerest appreciation to the CC family. You guys helped me past the most difficult times and gain invaluable experiences.

I would also like to apologize to those I inadvertently offended during these past months. With a limited vocabulary, I many a times could not articulate my thoughts clearly. You should see that I never use fault languages nor do I lie. I was just writing down what was on my mind and wanted to have an open discussion. I did not ever mean to be offensive to anyone and I did not trash any great Universities.

If there is one advice I would leave for other CCers, it is the importance of selected disclosure of information. Don’t give out exact test scores nor any thing that could be used to identify your child. I strongly believe that people from many universities are reading these forums. They could and would retaliate against your child because what you said here.

At then end, I do see it is the drive and ability within a student that makes the ultimate difference.

Thank you and wish you all of best of luck.

[mom2three]

We made exactly the same mistakes when DS#1 was applying 3 years ago - underestimating EFC (which was my ENTIRE teacher's salary - gulp!) and overestimating merit aid.

With #2 son we probably didn't reach as far as we should have - still stinging from the experience of great schools we couldn't afford with DS#1...

With #3 son, I'll try to follow the advice of the full-ride mom, and find a few schools that might offer a full ride to kids with my son's stats, apply to the FL schools, and then compare the total package (fit, finances, etc.) of the schools to which he is accepted. I'm glad we only do this one more time.

[patient]

Dad II, I think that was a lovely post. I wish you all the best with your daughter's decisions. You will love watching her, wherever she goes, as she transforms from a wonderful teenager into a delightful adult over the next 4 years. Let her spread her wings and fly and you will be completely captivated by what she will accomplish.

Let me tell you, as the parent of a college senior (and high schoolers), the years will absolutely FLY by and you'll be planning the trip to graduation sooner than you can imagine.....(getting nostalgic already here!)

[Chedva]

So DadII, what were the outcomes? Please update here or on the Master List!

[dbwes]

Dad II, thank you for sharing your experiences and perspectives with all of us on CC.

[taxguy]

Nice post Dad. Actually vastly too many folks underestimate their EFC and way overestimate their merit aid possibility. This is because colleges encourage applications as much as possible.Most colleges give very unrealistic expectations regarding aid.

You should check out the thread:Should you incur substantial debt for dream school or even pay the "dream" tuition?

I have been warning people about this problem for years to little avail. CC keeps taking this thread off of their featured list. Frankly, the thread that I have cited should be made into a permenant sticky thread,but they don't feel that way.

[prefect]

I like the title of your post. It seems like your D has some good options, especially in a year that was so tough for admissions.

[midmo]

Good luck with the visits, Dad II. I sincerely hope she is able to find something exciting about a couple of the schools when she is on the campus. Wherever she ends up, she will do great; she is smart, energetic, independent (as you know) and she will stand out.

You are certainly not alone in having underestimated what you will be expected to pay, and in not fully understanding what that meant for the type of college search you undertook. Do your friends, relatives, co-workers and neighbors a favor and pass your newfound knowledge on to them.

I believe you are correct that we parents need to be more circumspect with the information we give out. I am seeing a lot of stories about admissions staffers following conversations on these boards. Maybe they ignore parental indiscretion, maybe not. It is better not to take the chance.

[Youdon'tsay]

Good luck with your choices, DadII. While I haven't always agreed with your methods, I know that you have your daughter's best interest at heart.

[tokenadult]

There are two strategic mistakes we made in this process – underestimated our EFC and overestimated the probability of getting merit aids.

Thanks for letting people know to watch out for these common planning mistakes. Congratulations to your daughter.

[BunsenBurner]

Congratulations, DadII to you and your daughter, and thanks for sticking around and keeping us posted even after you'd been called a troll and badmouthed (guilty as charged, I know ). I think we all learned valuable lessons because of your shared experiences, and you deserve huge credit for that. I wish you all the best, and I'm absolutely sure that your determined young lady will be fine wherever she decides to spend her next 4 years. Have fun visiting, and try to let her make her choice.

[xiggi]

Actually vastly too many folks underestimate their EFC and way overestimate their merit aid possibility. This is because colleges encourage applications as much as possible.Most colleges give very unrealistic expectations regarding aid.

Actually, there is absolutely NO reason why people should underestimate their EFC. The FAFSA formulas are neither a secret or hard to compute. All it takes is to follow the instructions. Except for EXTREMELY complex situations, anyone can figure out the FAFSA EFC well before the application process starts and obtain an official number during the senior year.

Also, the information regarding the financial aid IS available, and so are the statistics that describe how schools interpret the definition of meeting 100% of need or not.

The reality is that wishful thinking compete with an objective analysis of what is available. People prefer to ignore the warning signs about the GREAT difficulty of earning merit aid and are rarely helped by clueless GC. Issues such as minimum STUDENT contributions are often ignored and simple rules such as the Federal EFC being the minimum contribution as well.

Year after year, we go through the same patterns on CC. The correct information is posted as warnings to the families of sophomores and juniors, but is not always understood nor ... accepted. The epiphany only appears between April 1 and the summer.