Summer After Freshman Year--Back In the Nest? Yes or No

[Bromfield]

My youngest, who will be completing her first year of college, is going back to the Y camp where she was a counselor for the last two years and, before that, a camper. It's about 2 hours from home and she gets one day and one night off each week. We probably see her three to four times during the 9 weeks she'll be at camp. This year, unlike other years, she'll have time at home before camp starts. Our family is renting a beach house for a month in May/June and she's welcome to come. It's a great spot and I know she's planning on going and inviting college friends.

[yayverily]

This is a sore point with W and I. DS, our only child, is a soph at MIT but hasn't spent a full summer at home since 2003. Little did we know that the summer after 9th grade would be our last full summer together as a family.

2004: 6-week summer session away at college
2005: 6-week summer program
2006: 10-week summer internship, company #1 (NYC)
2007: 10-week summer internship, company #2 (Boston close by!)
2008: 10-week summer internship, company #3 (Boston, close by!)

On the positive side, at least he's close to home (an hour drive) so we can see him (albeit briefly) fairly often. But, alas, extended time together is rare and treasured. When he does come home, it is brief and ends with "gotta get back--don't want to miss anything."

[bicoastalmom]

DS, a freshman and our youngest, is coming home for the summer and will be commuting by train into the city to work in a lab. Last summer he barely worked, and spent a lot of time lounging around wondering why his friends (who had to get up early to work) could not go out on a Tuesday night. I think this year will be different. He is looking forward to being home and we are looking forward to having him! We will all go fishing in PA as many weekends as we can.

DD graduated from college in 2007 and is now living and working on the "left" coast in San Francisco. I think she will come back to NY for Thanksgiving.

We spend a week or two every summer on the beach in Carlsbad, CA - HUGE family tradition. D is saving up her vacation to be able to join us, S will be done with work by then. This year at least, we are lucky!

[citygirlsmom]

My D will be in NYC and we are in SF...so...at least if I want to splruge and visit her, its a nifty place to go!!!

[bicoastalmom]

citygirlsmom - I feel the same way, in reverse!

[maysixxmom]

DD was home last summer (after freshman year) but worked so much and such crazy hours we didn't see her all that much. She's landed research position this summer with a very decent stipend (some housing & travel $ also) so she'll be in Houston. We'll get her for a few days at the beginning and the end. Her days of living here for long stretches appear to be over.

Now this house is too big for us (and 4 cats), but it needs too much work, that we can't afford, to sell and several houses on this street have been for sale for over a year!

[Neonzeus]

I'll have 2 home from college, both working and volunteering.

When the oldest got home after freshman year, he started sleeping in and staying out late. Gas in the cars mysteriously disappeared and the house started looking like a bombshell hit. The other two watched and I could tell they thought that being a college kid was going to be sweeeeeeet. I decided I didn't want to spend the next 12 years of my life dealing with college-aged children, so I sat all of them down and made a deal with them.

I pay their tuition bills and give them food and a place to sleep. I'll also pay the electric bills for their computers and IPOD chargers. I'll pay for their summer classes if they want to earn extra credits, and will be paying for their LSAT and PCAT exams this year.

In return, they wake up by 8:00 every day even if they aren't going to work in the morning (otherwise, we get up at 5:00 -- we're early risers) to help with family chores. They will not be out after midnight (they know I won't sleep until they get home) out of thoughtfulness since I'm old and cranky. They clean their rooms and assist with cleaning the rest of the house, cook and wash dishes, cut the grass, do the grocery shopping, help with their Dad's care since he's ill, drive their sibling to summer classes and clean/maintain the cars until I graciously agree to take them back to school.

I've told them that I won't be offended if they want to get jobs as summer camp counselors or if they want to go somewhere else during summers, but so far they still come home and follow the rules. It's not boot camp, it's a family working together. Life is good.

[bcparent]

Your daughter might be able to find a summer job and get a short term rental.
My daughter and 5 friends have found jobs and are renting a small cottage for the summer in Cape Cod.