I got caught cheating. What should I do?

[MomofWildChild]

Not only is there a lot of cheating going on in high school, it continues into college. There have been a couple major incidents involving large numbers of Wharton students in the last couple of years.

You will have to write an "Explanation of Suspension". Since this offense involves academic dishonesty, it could impact your admission to colleges more than a drinking or "prank" offense. It will not affect your admission to state schools quite as much. They are simply much more numbers driven and many don't even ask the question about suspensions. Your explanation needs to be concise and free of justification and excuses. If you really remediate yourself in the teacher's eyes, that could go a long way towards helping you.

[jjcddg]

While I'm sure that all schools would take a situation about honesty seriously, the OP is right in terms of it affecting his chances at "top" schools". With the exception of UVA, my son applied to schools that are ranked between 50-100, and none of them had the "suspension" question on it. UVA did.

The reason I was totally aware of this, was because my son was suspended in 9th grade for a prank, so when application time came around we were very nervous.

At the begining of senior year I asked the guidance department how the schools would view this. Their answer was to ask me if it had been an "out of school suspension"- it wasn't. Basically they told me that they do not report "in school suspensions" to the schools, so they told my son that because he did not have time off from school, he was NOT technically suspended and he should not report it to the school.

While I think cheating is far more serious than building a snowman on the roof of a school (yep that's what he did) I can't help but be curious as to whether or not your suspension was "in" or "out" of school.

[franglish]

It is entirely possible that colleges will be able to understand that you accept responsibility for having done this. They know that kids sometimes do stupid things. Heck, college students also do stupid things. Heck, ADULTS DO STUPID THINGS!! The important thing is for you to own up to it. It really was not a mistake, but it was wrong. A student from the school where I teach brought a lot of alcohol on a school trip a few years ago, and one student got alcohol poisoning and had to got to the hospital. She was fine, but the "bringer's" discipline was a three week suspension. Of course, he was very worried about college (he was a junior at the time, so yeah, good thing to worry about). He wrote his essay about the importance of owning his life, and he was accepted at most of his schools. He was up front and very remorseful about the whole thing. I think things would have turned out very differently had he not accepted responsibility. I suggest you do the same thing. One of the good things about being a young person is that we know you may do things that might not be using the best judgment. You are pretty lucky that you "got off easy." Try to relax, move on, but I don't really think you should put the whole thing behind you. Learn from this incident and become a more mature person.

[hornet]

Unfortunately some top schools do take cheats with disciplinary actions for cheating. At least 8 kids from D's HS with cheating disciplines were admitted to several schools listed in USNWR (one is in the top 10).

[Northstarmom]

"g. At least 8 kids from D's HS with cheating disciplines were admitted to several schools listed in USNWR (one is in the top 10)."

I suspect that your D's h.s. is not including the info about cheating on cheaters' transcripts and in the GC reports.

[DHRBC07]

In denial...this is the making of a great college essay. you can use your essay to talk about temptation and personal growth and what you learned about yourself. A lot of college admissions officers whom I have talked to love the essay that follows the trajectory of "I f***ed up big time. Here's what I did. Here's what I learned." You can't sugar coat it and because you are starting with the premise of honesty they have no reason the mistrust the rest of your essay.

[originaloog]

Id, chalk this up to a bad decision(not uncommon for a teenager or adult) and a lesson learned.

I can assure you that even though it may have an adverse inpact on your college applications, it will not have any longterm impacts on your life. In fact if it makes you more cognizant of the importance of personal integrity, the positives will far outweigh the negatives.

Be assured that there is no magic bullet impact associated with attending a highly selective or ranked college either. There are hundreds of great colleges that you can attend and in the end it is really your intelligence, diligence and other personal attributes that will determine your success in life.

[soozievt]

I agree with the advice of paying3tuitions in post 27. Yes, it may make your admissions file more chancy that you have a suspension for cheating and build a more varied list and not just top ten schools....BUT.....a lot will depend on how you approach it and as she wrote, these schools ask if you were suspended and to explain the suspension....and they don't say, if you were suspended, don't bother applying. And so they do read the "explanations" and this statement on your end will be very very important in your demonstrating what you learned and how you have changed since this incident of poor judgment. And having a GC or teacher also write about changes you have made will bode in your favor even though this suspension is a mark on your fine record.

[anitaw]

I would immediately suspend your focus on making things look right on college applications...and immediately focus all your efforts on making restitution for a serious mistake which you have made. Yes, we all make mistakes and the most important thing now is not that you somehow erase the issue,, but that you do what mistakes help us do best- learn.

If you do this, then perhaps those whose trust you have exploited will someday be able to rally to your side.

[MomofWildChild]

I disagree with DHRB (above). Do NOT make this your main college essay. Just handle it well on the Explanation of Suspension. I, too, am quite well-educated about suspensions etc.

[paying3tuitions]

^^agreeing with MOWC above.

Here, let me try an example. (One thing I don't hear loud and clear is that your school has talked to you meaningfully about any of this, other than to suspend you. That is why I'm jumping in to fill what I sense is a gap. Your parents might be stunned speechless, or not, because this was so uncharacteristic of you.)

The comparison: in academics, the currency or reward is grades. If you were in a storekeeper's shop and he excused himself momentarily, and you suddenly reached into the cash register to remove some bills, you stole. You didn't earn that money, you just tried to grab it. Others may have (should have) earned the money. And usually, you are a hardworking, honest worker; but you didn't deal well with a large temptation suddenly put in your path.

Can you figure out from whom you took the unearned goods? If you do, you can identify to whom you now owe restitution. (hint: you stole from several places, not just one...so it's an all-of-the-above kind of answer; think HARD...)

If you can use this awful week to challenge yourself to become an honest person within academic circles forever, you still belong in any college that will take you, tops or middling. The reason is that even a thief (which you were last week) can turn it around, by reflecting and making restitution, so he doesn't stay a permanent thief.

As well, you diminished your reputation. A person's good name is his reputation, and it too can be robbed from (by gossip, by others) or by onesself (as happened this past week)

But reputations can also be restored.

Are you capable of this kind of self-reflection and self-correction? Perhaps your school punished you lightly because they know you well enough to be hard on yourself. If you really tangle and wrestle with this now, I believe you will have the ability to recover your reputation and honesty following this incident. Some, not all, colleges/universities may recognize this, but that's for a future time to determine. Deal with NOW this week, and stop worrying so much about your college prospects. College admissions is really a smokescreen for what you need to come to understand this week or in the months ahead. If you figure it out, you might be a better candidate than some who arrive at college untested.

BTW, without blaming your teacher, as a teacher I did have a question about leavingt a computer open and exiting the room; to me, that's like putting a stumbling block before the blind, or leaving a cash register open while a customer is alone in a store. That doesn't excuse your bad decision, but I think it put you under considerable pressure somehow. As a teacher, I also didn't leave my purse sitting out on my desk when I taught poor students. It's currency, it's temptation. It's true and you recognized that you broke your teacher's trust, but I think the teacher made a bad judgment call then, too. JMHO.

[Northstarmom]

"As a teacher, I also didn't leave my purse sitting out on my desk when I taught poor students."

Maybe you only taught poor kids, so used only them as examples. However, just in case -- the same applies to rich students. Anyone can be tempted to steal. After all, most shoplifters are middle class women with enough $ in their purses to pay for what they stole.

[soozievt]

paying3tuitions....you never cease to amaze me with the fantastic guidance you offer! I hope this student heeds it. These are things he should do for now and for the reasons you stated. Worry about college apps later. At that time, after he has made these attempts to change and turn things around and make amends and make a difference, he will at the same time be better posed to apply to college and to write an effective statement on how he has dealt with this incident. Others will also be able to comment more favorably depending on what he does in the coming weeks.

[paying3tuitions]

point taken, NSM. I did only teach poor students; younger ones in a public school, and older ones in a max security prison. There I learned that, rich or poor, money left out is a temptation to avoid.

And I was constantly stunned at the high standards of honesty of many poor families.
Plus, generosity. Am still remembering how when we ran a drive for a food bank, the people without two nickles to rub together brought in cans from their pantries, while the owner of a restaurant wrote in to say they "always" give to the poor so won't be having their child bring in any cans. What a missed opportunity for someone in a position to give to teach their kid some generosity! So yes, middle class people can be stingier than poor people. It's all about people, I guess, tho that sounds sophomoric.

I was tryiing, hamfistedly, to cause the student to think about "changing a grade" just like "stealing cash" as a violation of community trust. It was an attempt to make an abstraction more concrete, not to blast poor people, who need no more blasting than they take every day. Thanks, tho, for picking that up and correcting it.

[oldfort]

I think in this case the teacher should also be held responsible. She should have locked the computer before she left her office. As an employee at a bank, we are required to lock our computer and "clean desk" wheneven we are not at our desk. The teacher has responsibility to safeguard her employer's proprietory information, even if the school has honor system.