Should we let S take computer games to college?

[bethievt]

I wouldn't say DS was addicted to games at all, but he could play for long stretches at a time. He always got his work done and I figured he would in college too, so we put no restrictions. He says he plays a lot less in college because there are so many more interesting things to do.

[3bm103]

If I am still trying to control their video game playing by the time they are adults, I did not do the job raising them that I had wanted to.

[cptofthehouse]

Sheesh. You think not letting him bring those chattels are going to cut down on games? Any college student with a gaming bug will be able t download games upon games on his computer. My kid came home with three hard drive supplements loaded with movies and games from college. They get stuff that isn't even out yet, don't ask me how. It's just more junk they can lose or break if they bring it so you may not have it for home any more.

3bm103, I am one of the many parents who did not do the job raising them that we wanted to do.

[carolyn]

3bm103, I am one of the many parents who did not do the job raising them that we wanted to do.>>

It's a big club, cptofthehouse, and I'm a charter member.

[archiemom]

"...If I am still trying to control their video game playing by the time they are adults..." then I need to get a life. Or do more shopping.

[JHS]

Should you let your S take video games to college?

Not if you can help it.

(You probably can't help it.)

[mathmom]

My son went off to college with a Wii, but no TV. We figured he might play with others on the dorm TV, but it seems he mostly doesn't play at all. He does play other video games with other kids. He also plays plenty of games by himself, and reads a couple dozen web comics and who knows how many message boards. He's also bought at least a couple of games for the computer that we know of.

I often thought he spent too much time on computer games in high school and would probably think the same if I were a fly on the wall at college - however his grades have always been excellent. It's really not my choice how he chooses to relax. As far as I know he hasn't stayed up the entire night on multiplayer role playing games like his roommate.

[thericwu]

Unless the problem is egregious, you have to let him grow up.

[jazzzmomm]

I recently read an article (sorry cannot remember where) that cited playing of video games as a main reason why boys blow off steam better and handle stress better in college. Though we would all LOVE to be able to keep on managing them after they leave home, they have to go out and risk a few mistakes in judgment.

[mom0809]

My DS graduates this May. At 21 he still plays video games. As a matter of fact, he has no finals, and all his papers are due before final exams. He plans to buy the latest, hottest video game (a specific one I don't remember the name of) after he turns in his last paper. He will pack in between playing and preparing for graduation.
He more or less messed up his first year because of War Crack (he didn't take any of his game systems off to school with him because I insisted that he didn't). At the beginning of Sophomore year he gave up War Craft cold turkey and hasn't played since. His grades improved and he even made the Dean's List. However, he bought a Ninetendo Wii and maybe with Rapmom's son (just kidding) bought another game system.
He's taking a year off to prepare for LSAT, GMAT &/or GRE, to work and to apply to grad school. I can't help but wonder if he hadn't spent all his spare time playing video games if he wouldn't be heading off to grad school in September.
All I can give to other parents is my best wishes because I have no advice, just past experience.

[bethievt]

jazzzmommm

My son did tell me often in HS that the games helped him deal with stress. Since he was getting good grades, doing EC's, sleeping (sort of) and taking showers, I went with the trust factor--we can't really control them in college anyway.

But, of course, no matter how well you raise them, things can go off the tracks for anyone at anytime. I'm thankful for every good day.

[midwesterner]

Some types of game-playing are more controlled than others. I'm sure we all played lots of time-wasting games in college, but I would be deeply worried about the kid as described, with weak social skills and a tendency to play too much.

My son's sophomore roommate showed up with the 25 inch TV and the mega-gaming system, which dominated their room and the roommate's life. Said kid also tended to stay up late playing games and then sleep in, missing class and almost flunking out. This is an addictive pattern that really needs to be addressed.

Freshman year is the time for changing behaviors, so why not insist that the game system stays home? You will kick yourself endlessly if the games contribute to school failure. Have a serious talk with your son about school and organizing his time effectively. In no way is this treating him like a child. It is showing him his path and how to travel it successfully.

[natmicstef]

S will not be taking his x-box for freshman year though he is trying to change that to first semester. It would be too easy for him to stay in his room and play/socialise on line and barely remember to eat let alone study. We are spending a lot of money to send him to college and worked hard to make that money.

We also did not apparently do the job raising him that we wanted to..so we are still trying.

[1of42]

Unless your son has a very addictive personality, I strongly recommend allowing him to take the games. Speaking from personal experience, people with game systems (and big TVs ) become very popular very quickly, and the game systems can be quite the social focal point.

[anxiousmom]

I developed a "compact" or agreement with DS before he chose his college. Amongst other things, it said that he would avail himself fully of the opportunities at his college, and that included severely limiting computer game playing. He signed willingly, and has done a splendid job balancing all the aspects of his freshman year at college. (Yeah!!!!)