very sad mom - Page 5

CollectivSynergy · 05-11-2008, 03:10 PM

Puddly - Maybe you should read the thread on the prevalence of entitlement mentalities in our generation.

GroovyGeek · 05-11-2008, 04:49 PM

I echo the opinions of other for choosing UW over everything else on the table. Certainly a better school than Pepperdine, and the in-state tuition should make it an easy choice. If UW was our instate school, we would have had to think very, very hard before turning down the $18k/year cost of an EXCELLENT education.

mini · 05-11-2008, 04:49 PM

I'd choose either PLU or UW over Pepperdine if the money were the same! The extra money would just be a bonus.

Is there something I'm missing, or is it simply the lure of the beach and lots of three-quarter-naked women?

(I half apologize, only because I fail to see what your son thinks makes Pepperdine so attractive? Are there programs there not available at the other schools? Is the quality of teaching in his field of study so superior? Are the documented outcomes markedly better?)

(The sibling thing: the college for my younger one is going to cost between 4X-5X that of my older one, and she will end up with some loans - though not overwhelming ones. She requires a different education than my older one, and brings different things to the table. She offered to go to a place where it would cost us less, and we wouldn't hear of it. But if the financial aid had been much less, we would have gone that route, and with no regrets.)

dmd77 · 05-11-2008, 06:08 PM

Has anyone said this? PLU is a really good school. The former students of mine who went there loved it, did well, learned a ton, and graduated to good jobs.

toneranger · 05-11-2008, 07:10 PM

Just wanted to pipe in that my son decided on a cheaper state U with lots of scholarships over some expensive privates (where we would have asked him to contribute some $ - nothing huge though). Thankfully, he was on the same page with us when trying to evaluate "value." Always been a very practical type... just can't look at things without considering price. No surprise that he chose business as his major.
Anyway, like the OP, we are saving a good chunk of money for him for grad school (looks like law maybe) AND we're funding a great study abroad trip this summer (never would have happened if he went to a a pricey private).
To the OP, I think you did the right things here...and your son made his choice. He's showing some childish behavior by pouting about not going to Pepperdine - but I'm sure he's probably picking up on your guilt. Hopefully, this will fade if you start shedding your angst and taking on a more positive, matter-of-fact attitude about this. You've done nothing wrong here...and you're being very generous to put out 120K for your son. Hopefully, he'll come around to see this.
And yeah, Pepperdine is no great shakes. Most people here on the East coast have never heard of it. I'm sure it's a quality school, but there are PLENTY of quality schools out there and they don't all cost 200K.
I have a feeling all will be well this time next year. All the best.

churning · 05-13-2008, 02:50 AM

We had a similar "dilemma" over here. After applying and being accepted by several schools, we realized that we could not afford my S number one choice school. The financial aid was just not there. Which was on the eastcoast. We kind of made a deal with him: If he chose a cheaper school, we would fund him a certain amount of money each summer to go where he wants to and obtain a job there for the summer. He ended up choosing an OOS state school, which is by no means cheap, but works out to about 20k per year less than his #1 private school choice. I just could not see going deeper in debt than we had to. And now he is extremely excited to go to that school, as he picked the major and it's in the same state as the expensive private school. In fact with the small scholarship he recieved, it works out to almost exactly the cost of our in state school to which he was accepted to, but never really showed any interest in attending. Well I say give it a year and see how things turn out. Your son has to realize that in reality the money used to pay for his college is YOURS, not his and you can choose to spend it any way you choose, regardless of what you did for your daughter. Goodluck to you and your family.