What would you tell my daughter?

[optimisticdad]

I am familiar with Vandy.

Yes, there are a lot of kids who are from wealthy families and into the status and name brand name thing. However, there are a whole bunch of kids who have a different set of priorities. Your daughter will have no problem finding like-minded peers.

Having said this, if you want a more unassuming environment, UVA would be a much more safe bet - and would provide an excellent education. My son is also an Echols Scholar and is more than likely to end up there.

The funny thing is that among some kids in Virginia who are contemplating college, UVA is considered to have a lot of arrogant kids from wealthy families!

[DSMOM]

I haven't posted yet- I usually just read. I am from the state of Virginia, and UVA is also perceived very much as a rich kid's school here. Many kids don't apply there because they feel they won't fit in. Your description of Vanderbilt students matches exactly the type of many of the students here that attend UVA. I also know a few going who do NOT fit this mold.

I think you can meet many different types at any of these schools. I never had an interest in attending UVA (and either did my child) largely due to their image and our visits there. It's a beautiful, excellent school that some people are not comfortable at.That said, I do believe my daughter, a well rounded student, would have met others like herself and been happy there- as your child will wherever she goes! I think the main thing is to pick the school where she feels the biggest pull.

[ohio_mom]

Welcome, DSMOM!

[ohio_mom]

frazzled,
thank-you for the fashion update. My last experience with Coach was *decades* ago, selling them in the downtown Cleveland Halle's (a well-heeled old school department store, gone the way of most such). My child is a boy. Ahem.

[oldman]

Read with interest all the comments.....funny how varied the opinions are. In the late 70's UVA a very preppy place....white, Christian, conservative, southern......Izods and khakis only please!

I've been back 3 times this year. Jeans and tee-shirts, Asians and blacks....my son and his buddies are shlumps and fit in. I am sure however that there are pockets of the elite. Nevertheless the perception as a rich kid haven may be based on what was rather than what is.

[caseyatbat]

Frazzled1- Thank you for the thread. We are in the exact same boat as your family--and can only hope that circumstances push us one way or another. D is a Ca. kid from a relatively affluent area and also not "untouched by the pleasures of material goods" (well put!). But she is also a well rounded, grounded, and focused girl--naturally influenced by peers and surroundings. I have your same concerns, and she has the same postive feelings about both schools. Our dilemna is complicated additionally by UNC (how long does it take to see and get another good feel for all 3 schools??) and the draw of great in-state UCs. D is not Echols and her Vandy $$ are not quite as generous--but substantial. We are planning a whirlwind trip for next weekend and hope to attend the last of the Admit Days. All I can say is that I hope something becomes clearer to her then. Our consolation is that it is truly a WIN-WIN. Let's count our blessings. Good luck. I'll keep up with these comments....

[optimisticdad]

Here you go - a thread that actually asks if UVA students are snobbish!!

You can check out the responses.

Is it true that UVa students are snobbish?

I believe that you will find Vandy to be pretty much the same way ie a mixed bag. The one thing that I would add is that Vanderbilt is probably a much more Southern school than is UVA.

[parentstwo]

I posted earlier about some of my own negative impressions of Vandy as a student in the early 80's. I would suggest one way to quantify the issues that might be most pertinent to FRAZZLED1.

You list your location as NY.

On my Freshman hall there was a fair amount of geographic diversity. However, after the first year, kids fom MI, OH, IN and three from South FL all transferred out. I don't think it was a problem with academics. I just don't think they liked the social scene. On the other hand, almost all of the guys from the South, particularly the deep South where I am from, ended up graduating. I know that most colleges publish their retention rate. However, in the case of Vanderbilt, an interesting question might be, "of the kids who do not graduate, what is the percentage of those not from the South?"

If you can get an answer to that question, you might have a better idea whether the non-Southern kids are happy there.

[optimisticdad]

If you can get an answer to that question, you might have a better idea whether the non-Southern kids are happy there

I don't know if that would provide a meaningful answer. I am sure that one would find more kids who leave from geographical areas other than the South. It would be more revealing to find out, assuming the information is available, what percentage of the student population is from the South today versus when you were there in the early 80s'. In other words, is there a greater degree of diversity?

The other thing to keep in mind is that Nashville is a city that has a fairly significant influx of people from other parts of the US - it is unlike other cities in TN.

The governor of TN is originally from the North East - a Democratic governor in a red state. If I recall correctly, he went to school at Harvard.

We actually worked together in years gone by. Today, he is governing the state - and I am posting on a college forum

[pamvanw]

My daughter graduated from UVA. We are middle class, out of state, & she fit right in. She loved her 4 years there & says they were the best 4 years of her life so far. I was discussing this subject with her the other day because my son's friend wants to go to a school that is much more costly than his second choice where he is being offered a 3/4 tuition scholarship. The parents can afford both, but one would be financially less draining. My daughter's response to me was priceless & made me feel that our money, & her loans, were money well spent. She said that at the end of the day, if you can afford a school, it's not the money - it's if you're where you want to be.

[momofthree]

frazzled,

I admit that my experience is dated, but I do have a sense that Vandy kids have a certain sense of entitlement. While in college at Sewanee, I was a kid blessed to go (because of a scholarship) to a summer program at Oxford that involved kids from Sewanee, Rhodes, and Vanderbilt. The kids from Vandy were aloof and distant from the rest of us in a way that left a lasting impression on me. Then a year later, I went to George Peabody College for a Masters degree; Vandy absorbed Peabody the next year, and for $1500 I could have had my degree from Vandy instead of Peabody. It was not just because I didn't have the spare change than I decided not to go that route. Just didn't want to get the degree from Vanderbilt. I might have been stubborn, (yes, it is likely) but I was struck again and again that the students at Vandy seemed cool and aloof. Sounds like perhaps not a lot has changed. My niece went to UVa, though, and she, a very down to earth person, absolutely loved it!

[mamacita]

Here are some other things to consider for a possible classics/Latin major. Rhodes (Memphis) has a great classics department and a classics scholarship only available to students who major or minor in Latin or Greek. There aren't many students seeking it. Sewanee has a great classics department. Georgia has a great honors college, and its Foundation Scholarship is so attractive that students accepted at Ivies go to Georgia. I believe there is a strong classics department.

[mamacita]

Sorry. I lost track of your D's timeline. I thought she was a junior. However, my daughter had the same reaction to Vandy. While we were there, she was counting designer garments and accessories. She found the fashion frenzy overwhelming. After one visit, she was definitely headed elsewhere. She isn't interested at all; however, if your D is fashion and brand conscious, I'm sure her reaction isn't one of visceral distaste. She should choose the program that fits the best and not the fashion profile.

[thumper1]

I only started reading this thread because I was bored....but I am finding it very helpful. We are New Englanders of modest means (unless you ask the FAFSA folks who say we are wealthy). Our daughter is looking at southern schools. While she is not looking at either Vandy or UVA, she has found the same "rich kids" issues at schools she is interested in. She recently scratched Southern Methodist University from her list because "all the kids seem like they got BMWs for their 16th birthdays". She loved Davidson, but the Lili Pulitzer dress on our tour guide was a red flag as was the "brag book" that listed where the current students attended high school (more than 50% come from private high schools, and the publics are from very wealthy towns). She wants a nice climate, but is concerned about the southern "belle" image she perceived at some schools too. This thread is giving us both some more food for thought.

[lorelei2702]

My daughter went to SMU some years ago, and it was the running joke that she referred to fellows she dated by the car they drove, slumming was a Jeep. She had very generous merit money, though R & B fees were ridiculously high. She wound up hating the place, partly because of political attitudes of others, cultural attitudes discussed in core classes, and internal departmental problems. The school was quite accommodating about many things, though, as mid-tier private schools tend to be, much different experience than with state schools.

Since she came from pretty funky high school, we enjoyed seeing the pearls and loafers appear! No blue hair in sight (not her, she had been warned to expect to wake up bald).