If you knew then what you know now...

sybbie719 · 05-19-2005, 02:26 PM

Looking at some of the most recent thread topics ranging from Why is it inane to think that everyone should attend a reach? Is it possible my D will be rejected by all her schools to Which is better ? I can tell you first hand that I have learned so much since D applied to school.

If you knew then what you know now would you have done anything differently in the application process?

applesatyr · 05-19-2005, 02:32 PM

Is she a transfer? You have to be more specific, because it varies depending on if you are a prospective
freshman
transfer
or graduate applicant.

pattykk · 05-19-2005, 02:41 PM

We would not have applied to any schools that did not offer merit aid. My daughter was a good candidate for the elite need-blind schools, but we cannot afford them, so applying was a waste of time and tears.

cangel · 05-19-2005, 03:07 PM

1) Done some low key campus visits in the soph year, or soph summer. Maybe even to schools that we wouldn't think would be great possiblities, just to get a feel for size, locale, etc. That would have freed up time in junior spring to visit a few more strong possiblities.

2) Taken some standardized tests earlier (maybe the SATIIs) or at least paid more attention to the months when the tests are given - DD had a lot of conflicts junior year, and had to cram those tests together.

ohio_mom · 05-19-2005, 03:23 PM

I made some assumptions on money that turned out not to be true. I thought that my son's GPA would put him out of the running for merit aid. To my surprise, he received a very good merit offer at a school that offers both needs-based and merit aid (the merit offer was higher than the finaid would have been). Also, I did make a mistake on the finaid calculators by not adding the 401K contributions back in, so our contribution is higher than I thought it would be.

The other big error was my son's not taking the PSAT in sophomore year - but it was opposite a memorial service for my best friend so there was nothing to be done about that.

Faline2 · 05-19-2005, 04:04 PM

Take your SAT II exams seriously and do the prep book..those scores can strengthen the liklihood you will in the "considered" pile at schools that have too many equally qualified students. Self-study for APs if you think you can do well on one if your classroom instruction is weak--Assume personal responsibility for SATIIs and APs when possible--that really conveys readiness to "extract" an education on any campus. Admissions lessons for my S included learning that class rank is not as important at most schools as demonstrating that you have an interesting thing to contribute to the community of your future college. Take a couple of interests-- be they based in the arts, sports, writing, debate or employment and go in depth in your commitment to them. Show that you are a giver not just a taker. Not only will the adcoms recognize you for your "hook" but your guidance counselors can portray you clearly if you are associated with a program, talent, personal passion, sport or artistic focus.

Do not wait till the last minute on getting references..which is a problem for Early Decision kids. In the same vein, do not wait till October to set up visits to favorite colleges if you are Regular Decision...get there once for a glimpse junior year, and once for an overnight and classes if possible. Adcoms need to see that you are seriously considering attending. Go ahead this summer and put together a chart that mimics the Common Application Activity Sheet and fill it out. Make it appealing and its top three messages about you should pop off the page. Don't include annoyingly esoteric activities. Take it to an experienced adult and get feedback and revise. Have this Activity Sheet ready for your references and your alum interviews, but personalize a cover letter to each reference with a couple of things you hope they will include when writing about you...jolt their memories with details if you hope they can write a colorful letter about you. Help them out...they are already working full time and it is hard to write something fresh and new if you have written scores of references. If you are applying to more than one school, write a couple of sentences about why each school option could be a good match for your learning goals and personal style. How else is your reference supposed to visualize you there if you don't paint the picture for them? If you are a bit introverted, do your best to convey who you are to your teachers and references...now is the time!

speckledegg · 05-19-2005, 04:11 PM

Next time around, we will finish college visits before the start of senior year.

Islandmom · 05-19-2005, 05:03 PM

I would have been more insistent that we begin looking at colleges in the junior year and we should have had more campus visits before the senior year.

TheDad · 05-19-2005, 09:43 PM

Good responses here, all the way around.

I'd have to ask D what *she* would do differently...hard to say, because she's extremely happy with how things have turned out. She did say that she was stupid to apply to Yale EA before her SAT's bumped from 1480 to 1580...but I'm not sure that would have made a difference. In retrospect, her post-EA essays were stronger. She needed to get her test scores up on iteration earlier than they did. Fwiw, there are two issues with doing well on the SAT: be able to do the material and having one's mind aligned with how to take the test. D's shortcoming, such as it was on an admittedly high scale, was in the latter...just learning to work fast enough and confidently enough to leave no unanswered questions was the key.

Alumother · 05-19-2005, 10:01 PM

I think about this a lot, especially since son&only will be coming down the pike.

1. Focus on SATs. Do the Xiggi SAT prep methodology starting junior or even sophomore year.
2. Set a list of colleges where at least one safety fits the profile of the best-beloved schools. If the kid likes 5000 people schools don't have safety be the 30,000 kid state school, no matter how good said state school is.
3. Start working on essays summer before senior year.
4. Make sure essay comes from kid's heart and has that feel of authentic teenagerhood.
5. Find out what college policy is on extra stuff, CDs, artwork, etc. That stuff will frequently have an earlier deadline for submission. Submit it!
6. Repeat of #2.

Islandmom · 05-19-2005, 10:40 PM

Alumother, I really like #4 in your last post but #3 would have been very tough to get my d to do. (I tried.)

Whitneylm · 05-20-2005, 09:26 AM

Oh man, would I ever. XP

Let's see...

1. Do not get Mono in the January of your Junior year. I was very sick, especially once I finally realized I had it in May. All summer was spent resting and visits were out of the question. :P I guess this is out of one's control though.

2. Do not underestimate ones abilities. I really limited myself by convincing myself that my low SAT/ACT would keep me out of schools I might have really been intrested in if I had let myself. So, thus, I applied to a lot of match schools I didn't even really like and, had I not gotten into Reed (which I applied to on a whim, with the "knowing" I'd be rejected), I would have been mildly devestated with my options.

3. Figure out what you want BEFORE you begin applying.

4. Follow every gut instinct when it comes to schools you want to apply to!

5. Don't get caught up in college-craze. No matter how much people look down on it, your SAT/ACT score is probably just fine and there are tons of schools that fit you out there if only I would have ever looked. XP

fundingfather · 05-20-2005, 09:48 AM

Would have changed: Would have applied to fewer schools to minimize the stress factor. Fall of senior year was not a pleasant time in his life.

Would not have changed: Son took the SAT once with little prep, got a good score but with some upside potential. Rather than obsess over prepping and taking it a second time, he accepted the first result. He still got into his first choice school.

Faline2 · 05-20-2005, 10:24 AM

Fundingfather...accepting your first test score as valid and "good enough" is a healthy way to go and it is great that he got his first choice school! Congrats. However, summer before senior year can be a time some students get realistic..and we observed maturing and focusing skills in our rising senior as college application season arrived. Our student took initiative re taking SATIIs and prepping for them junior spring when his peers put them off, and he totally altered his standing just from some quiet review of Real SATs over summer months. He basically learned how to pace himself and absorbed simple test strategy. He was rewarded for this initiative with a new college list and with admission to two out of three reach schools. So if you have a kid who is approaching senior year..they may surprise you. We were surprised. We did have to visit a tier of schools not formally on "the list" a bit late but it was fun.
Oh yeah...don't recommend Eagle Scout projects for senior years. Cudos to scouts who can see the future Senior Year crunch enough to do them in 9th, 10th or 11th grades...

epiphany · 05-20-2005, 10:49 AM

worry less, trust more (esp. student's & parents' own instincts); listen less to fear-mongers & hysterical people. Sometimes I feel as if I've just completed some Extreme Sport.

Seriously, our first hunches turned out to be true -- with regard to choices, with regard to acceptances, with regard to which colleges would & would not come through with aid. (Luckily, D did not apply to the colleges that others later found out did not come through with aid -- despite hints, promises from those colleges.) A little self-protection is a good thing, but we engaged in way too much of it, due to listening too much to others.

It seems so easy to get caught up in the hype & hysteria surrounding this whole process, including -- perhaps mostly fueled by -- the media (USNWR, Newsweek, etc.) Yes, definitely get plenty of information, but then take a few deep breaths, everyone. Calm promotes decision-making, anyway.

I do think that starting early (minus terror) promotes that calm. It seems to be esp. imp. for those families whose students are quite independent & are "take-charge." Frankly, the chief reason I got involved in the research process (providing info to D) was that high-achievers like herself lack the time, unless they get a very early start. She also very much welcomed & sought the research from me, but many students want to be driving the engine. They won't have time to reach their destination if they begin the trip in Sr. Yr. with 5 AP's & 3 major e.c.'s in the back of the van. That's just the math of it all.