gypsyrose

I have a son who is entering 8th grade this fall and will applying to boarding schools for entry as a 9th grader fall 2013. We as a family know very little about boarding schools, but our son has always been a curious student and announced to us last year that he wanted to go to Exeter. Initially resistant, we researched and explored the idea and believe that this may be what he is meant to do- if he can get into a top-notch school (it would be too painful to part with him for anything less, sorry if that doesn't sound right, but we can only be that selfless if what is getting is something extraordinary!) anyway- we wanted him to look at other schools, besides Exeter, and have discovered there are SO MANY wonderful boarding schools where he could have an extraordinary experience. I have heard the 'fit' comment and couldn't agree more- but that is so hard to tell from websites and literature. We live 6+ hours from most of these NE schools, so visiting just to get a 'feel' is very hard. trying to keep this brief, also very hard, but I want to know, in trying to cast a 'wide net' due to very low acceptance rates- is our net too wide?? Exeter, Deerfield, Choate, Hotchkiss, Middlesex, Groton, Northfield Mount Hermon, Lawrenceville, Kent and Taft- (Student summary: He is an A student, scored well enough on practice SSATs to be competitive, a strong 2+ sport athlete, some interesting EC & CS... challenge: he is shy and can come across somewhat flat in interview- but he is sweet and beloved by his peers. has spent summers at sleep away camp for the last 5 years and is confident he will do well indepently at BS. Also he does not need financial aid, there are no private school options where we live, somewhat of a rural setting- decent public school, but he is hungry for more!) He is also a skier and a very down to earth, humble kind of kid. Any thoughts on which schools on our list sound NOT for him and likewise any that might be a better 'fit'? THis is my first post on CC- have been lurking for awhile and PM'd some parents whose advice I was seeking- thank you all for your thoughtful input and advice!

Periwinkle

I do not think your net is too wide. Most of the schools you list have very low acceptance rates. In addition to the schools you list, I recommend you look into St. Mark's, St. Paul's, Milton, Andover, and others, including at least visiting a single-sex boarding school... Many schools share the salient features of an academic boarding school, but each student body and campus has its own culture.

If you're 6+ hours away from New England, you should also consider boarding schools closer to home. The Culver Academies, in Indiana, and St. Andrew's School in Delaware, are mentioned at times by happy parents.

It is unfortunate that at most schools, if a student needs financial aid, winning acceptance and financial aid can be an uphill battle.

Momof7thgrader

I would consider hiring a consultant. They can get to know your family and son and make recommendations based on his personality/skills/grades etc.

ExieMITAlum

He's clearly "ready" especially if he has great academic prep, good scores and had experiences that let him live away from home (camps, etc.).

Still - a lot of us who have been through the trenches and survived (smile) advocate casting a wide net because schools don't just look at the credentials, they also look to shape their classes and fill specific needs so a student who might not get selected at one top school might find a home at another. And because there just isn't enough space at each school for each applicant that wants to go.

Also, the schools have different personalities and that will factor into the "fit" equation. We arranged to fly to NE over a long weekend and were able to fit in 5 school visits in three days (carefully mapped). It made a difference to see where my daughter felt comfortable, which staffs responded to her beyond standard interview protocol, and where there just didn't seem to be a "connection."

On the other hand - that wasn't a possibility when I was younger and I went to Exeter sight unseen. So don't despair. Just do your best. They're all good schools in the end.

ops

Welcome gypsyrose. The net is not too wide and as you stated there are many wonderful schools. Your net did fetch an interesting mix of large, medium and small schools. There are plenty of CC supporters for all the schools you mentioned plus some. I noticed your son is a skier but of course that does not mean the BS he attends must offer skiing as a sport? Making a list can be trying enough and probably the most difficult aspect in preparing the journey. Many of the schools websites can be a chock-full of information, once you've mastered navigating the sites. There will be attachments to school magazines and newspapers full of insights provided by students and teachers alike.

The comment by ExieMITAlum is correct. They are building their classes and as we say here on CC, if they are in need of an underwater tuba player then that's a good thing but they may not need two of them. Approaching this whole adventure from the right perspective can make it a really fun and exciting experience, enjoy the journey!

Charger78

I think you might want to get an official SSAT score in early on (October?) so that there is time to react to it if there are differences from the "practice tests". If the score is less than you'd like, you will have a few months to practice more intentionally before a retest, the latest date being January 2013. An actual score might influence your list. Another consideration is whether the persons writing recommendations have experience doing this. If not, you might be overburdening them unless you can use a common application form to cover several of the schools. (Presumably, they do not have too many other students to write for, but you should probably stay sensitive to who is writing, and to how much.) If you cannot whittle down the list by the end of July, maybe you should drive to see "bubble" schools in August to help eliminate some before fall visits that include an interview and students on campus whom you would hope to speak with. Ten seems a bit high to me; many kids can do fine with five to eight, but they often have a day school back-up, so . . . Not needing FA and not living in NE may mean that from your original list your son has a "good" shot at at least three of the schools, with the credentials as described, imho. (We went through the process last fall.) Three more good but not as ridiculously selective schools would be the Hill, Mercersburg and Peddie, but if skiing and college matriculation lists are critical, then your first list is spot on (with St. Paul's and Andover?). Some of your attention might be focused on determining how the size of the school will matter, and maybe rural/suburban/urban will be a factor as you get on campuses. SevenDad's thread on the process for his older daughter is a valuable reference.

ops

On second thought C78 is right, 10 maybe stretching it a bit. As for the letter writing part, just don't hand them to his teachers so God forbid they have homework over the breaks. Provide them with ample time.

2prepMom

We started in about the same place, having to fly in, and carefully scheduled "grouped" visits (groton Friday AM, Deerfield Friday PM, St Pauls Saturday, Andover Monday AM, Middlesex Monday PM). Several schools quickly came off the list once visited, but you will not know until you go and see. In the end, we were down to a "top 3" that she put a lot of effort into. Oh, and schedule the first admission interview go-around at possibly lower interest schools. It takes practice to get smooth in interviewing.

Weatherby

Casting a wide net to me means applying to a few of the very top schools, a few of the very good schools, and also a few that a child would be happy to attend and would very likely gain acceptance. Applying to ten of the most competitive schools might not necessarily enhance the chances given the low acceptance rates of the schools listed in the OP. Then again, there is the legitimate point of view of going big or go home. If your child absolutely wants to attend a BS, you may want to consider a few slightly lower ranked schools provided they are close to ski areas like Holderness in the White Mountains.

Periwinkle

Here's the page for NEPSAC Alpine Skiing: The Official Website NEPSAC Alpine Skiing.

Exeter doesn't field a ski team. St. Paul's will discontinue its alpine ski team after 2013.

If you orient yourselves to skiing in high school, you could build a list of: Northfield-Mount Hermon, Deerfield, Concord Academy, Middlesex, Loomis Chaffee, Taft. I'd recommend you also check out Berkshire, Gould, Holderness, and Avon Old Farms. (There are other good schools on the list of schools which offer ski teams.)

Skiing is funny, though. I don't know if any prep school skiers ski in college as well. If your son is a serious skier, there are also the Ski Academies. Burke, Stratton Mountain, Carrabassett Academy, (and others.) Here's a NYT article about ski academies: SKIING; Groomed for Success at Ski Academies - New York Times.

Looking at their college acceptance lists, Middlebury, Williams, and Dartmouth like ski academy kids.

ops

Some of my ski buddies raced for Hotchkiss then on to Dartmouth and Middlebury back in the '70s. They don't know why Hotchkiss stopped their ski team. Why is St. Paul's discontinuing their ski team? Heard they had a decent season. Salisbury (all boys) has an excellent ski team too.

mhmm

As periwinkle said - skiing is funny. You can't be a competitor on a junior national level (the type that get recruited for top colleges, and obviously Olympics) and attend a regular BS. If you have that kind of talent, the only way to go is one of the Ski Academies. Preferably out West.

mauiluver

In my opinion your net isn't cast wide enough. One of the things we learned this past year is that although a school looks great on paper, in the end you can walk in and not like the place after a 2 or 3 hour interview. This happened with most of the schools our daughter interviewed at. She walked out or I walked out and one or both said "no way", and sometimes that was for an intangible feeling we couldn't put our finger on. We found that with schools that were in the same general area we could do 3 in a day, but that was a 12 hour day, I wouldn't recommend it, but if you have to, then you have to. You really do want the school that feels best to your child and with whom you have confidence.

MA2012

10 schools is not too many to consider at this point. There are some good suggestions by others on different schools to consider as well. It was suggested to us that kids should consider applying to 5-8 private schools, fewer is fine if you have public school you would be happy to attend. But you might want to look at more to consider your options and then narrow down for applications.

One thing I learned is that many schools interview first, and then the kids submit their application after. So not everyone who interviews ends up applying. Sometimes the fit isn't right. The interview can be considered part of the process in finding the right school. We have not gone on any formal visits yet, but have walked around several campuses.

Good luck - we are in the process of narrowing schools and lining up fall interviews too.

SevenDad

@MA2012: My daughter interviewed at 4.5 (one interview was very informal) schools to which she did not end up applying. We definitely used the tour/interview to help determine fit.