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Hey y'all. Quick update. Counseling has worked very well for me, and I quite frankly don't really care very much what people think of me anymore. Especially not about that dumb social media stuff (dear goodness, flipping through the previous pages is SO cringeworthy now lol). Grades weren't exactly what I wanted, and I unfortunately failed to make the Dean's list yet again, but my lowest was a B minus. I kept my 3.1 average, which I guess is a positive considering my struggles with staying healthy (mentally and physically) this semester. The good news is that I'll be entering my major next semester - International Business + French minor was officially declared last month - so I will be taking courses that are more suited to my interests and and career aspirations, so I definitely expect much more of myself next semester. Currently back home hunting for a full-time summer job. Trying to learn how to be somewhat comfortable up here given my history...I'm not sure if I can ever achieve that really. Hoping to at least be able to return to campus a day or two earlier in August if I'm unable to visit my friends down there during the summer. I've gotten to the point where I'm a lot closer to my college friends than my HS friends. And an update on the living situation that I will still be living ON-campus next semester before studying abroad.
Thankfully, it looks like I'll be staying at UNCW to complete my degree. I never applied for transfer to Rutgers, and the best in-state public with a deadline that hasn't yet passed is Rowan...so I'm confident that I'll be staying put. And I'm very happy now that I never put in any transfer apps, and after the whole Penn State tragedy, especially happy that the fraternity aspirations didn't work out. My social life has been on a nice uptick since, and despite a few inevitable hiccups here and there, things are now very much falling into place. Especially with what had been my chief social worry. Happy to say that none of the previous BS matters a lick anymore :)
I'd like to thank you all for your help throughout this thread in the last five months. What a rollercoaster ride it has been indeed. It hasn't been easy, but sure as hell has been worth it.
@twoinanddone well, the on-campus housing contract website says we could move in on the 12th of August (the Saturday before, which is when the freshmen move in), so we technically could move in earlier. But I remember last year my RA said that we could move in on the Thursday or Friday before classes started as well. I'm assuming it's the same for this year...
@Coloradomama actually, it is less about my family and more about the people I met here. My former schoolmates honestly represented why NJ is the most-disliked state in the country; very snobby, ALWAYS bragged about their material things, thought they were better than everyone else in the state and the country, extremely judgmental and insufferably arrogant elitists (look at it this way: they had a "Rich-Out" against their main rival HS a while back. Notice how I use "they" and not "we"). REALLY not the place to be if you weren't rich or white (I was neither). I honestly don't know how I had enough self-control to go without slugging anyone in the face, because there were a LOT of people who deserved it, quite frankly. I was treated horribly in addition to the adversity I was experiencing behind the scenes. WAY too many painfully awkward memories growing up. I felt like I had everyone judging every single thing I did. Teachers in my first two years always talked down to me and made me feel bad about myself. One certain kid who always tried to intimidate me and aggravate me with his petulance. Other issues I won't mention. Worst experience of my life. And to anyone who sees this, don't bother replying if you're going to trivialize this by saying "most kids hated high school". NO. What I had to endure was wholly different than anyone else. And it's because of all this that I find myself sorta subconsciously growing apart from many of my HS friends. Not as eager to really hit them up, in part, because of the fact that they had to tolerate me through all my stupid awkward phases and that crap (though I am planning on visiting my HS best friend at Rowan, he's taking a summer class there). I have some other good HS friends that I hang out with from time-to-time, but the only friend I really hang out with up here on a reliably consistent basis is my friend that I made from my CC summer class last year who is ~5-7 mins away in a different town. I MUCH prefer being at UNCW to home because my college friends never had to see me growing up. And yes, I have a few people I dislike in Wilmington, but at least I can be comfortable with myself and not have to walk around with everyone having a preset perception or judgment or expectation of me.
The beaches here are overrated. Not that beautiful, always overcrowded with loud and annoying tourists, the water is murky, and they charge admission. NC has far, far better beaches that are free admission. The diversity aspect is highly overrated; it's not like blacks and whites live amongst one another in the same neighborhoods. Proximity is also overblown. What does it say about a state when its best aspect is its proximity to cities in other states? Northern NJ (where my family lives) is also home to many of NJ's worst aspects: huge overcrowding which leads to congestion, traffic, and very angry, unfriendly people who don't take at all kindly to strangers and have huge temper problems and awful accents. In fact, walking up to someone to say hello is highly discouraged. They don't even smile back like they do in NC at all! There's absolutely zero chill up here.
Is it everyone? No, obviously not. I cannot stress that enough, and yet I know that people will probably STILL criticize me for saying this regardless. Is it representative of my own personal experience? Sadly, yes. And THAT'S why I don't want to come back to live here, besides the fact that the COL would suffocate any freshly-minted college grad. It's not my fault that my attempts to get my family to maybe consider a move OOS were met with acceptance from one parent (who actually started the discussion) but lukewarm feelings from the other.
I do definitely miss the pizza and bagels up here when I'm away, as well as the public transportation. But the fast food, BBQ, and beaches in NC absolutely obliterates the offerings in NJ. Put all that together with much nicer, friendlier, more genuine people and a much more manageable COL, and NC just fits me better as a person. MUCH better. I love being with my family, especially watching soccer and basketball with my dad and brother. But I can't ignore everything else that made/makes it so unbearable for me. I'm sorry if you weren't expecting this response, just know that in no way was my rant directed specifically at you or anyone else on here.
Adding on from that, it feels like every semester just HAS to have some certain level of frustration, doesn't it? Each college semester seemingly would be incomplete without at least some weeks of total aggravation, whether it's academic, interpersonal, or some combo of the two.