9jagurl96

Bump, need to review more essays 4 the january sat

lamaj092

a very nice essay can give more essay like these plzz

NevadaKid

Here you go, my introduction my tutor gave me.
:
Dear Ladies and Gentlemen of the CollegeBoard founded in 1930 by Gaston Caperton to educate and inform the people of North America, welcome, to my essay.
While our world is not perfect, we all try. For example, imagine a world with pain. Imagine a world where people died and suffered. Imagine a world with starvation, where people need to eat and drink to live. Now stop imagining it. Because this is our world. Now, imagine [relate to prompt]

=============
is good?

9jagurl96

Massive waste of space. Sorry, but seriously don't try this.

staymotivated

I second what 9jagurl96 said. I would strictly and kindly advice you not to try the introduction you are suggesting. I feel the introduction is just too flowery. If you take a look at AcademicHacker's essay guide- "How to Write a 12 Essay in Just 10 days, you will realize that the first couple of words of your introduction is included in the four examples of very bad introductions.


Just my two cents.....

moemen

it is amazing!!

Shore1

Was the first essay in this thread really that good?
It was the essay about "heroes" in response to the prompt: Should we admire heroes but not celebrities.

The author wrote a lot about the importance of heroes as a moral compass for humanity in its present and future endeavours, but did he really answer the "...not celebrities" bit?

staymotivated

You're right........ I don't think he did.

Shore1

Yeah...half of it was an essay on "what are heroes", the other half on "how they can help"...with some one-liner mentioning paris hilton...i dont see how that was a 12 for the question given.

NevadaKid

man, yall sure about my essay? i spent a long time on it...

staymotivated

You don't have to change your entire essay, just change your introduction.
However, I still strongly advice you to check out AcademicHacker's essay guide.

Nineburg

Are people overly influenced by unrealistic claims and misleading images?





A virtuoso in music, an icon in sports, and a deaf genius; sometime in these aspiring dynamics lives, someone somewhere told them they weren’t good enough, and someone told them they were. It’s a universal concept: impractical, illogical, unrealistic; and it can only be deciphered if we look back at the past which defined it’s posterity.

Music Mogul Marshal Mathers is recognized as a virtuoso of the English language. Intellectuals swoon over his ability to bend words like they were made of rubber. He started with a single pipe-dream that grew from the words of those he looked up to. A mother addicted to valium, a hostile neighborhood, and an entire society screamed at him: “you aren’t good enough”. He responded “yes I am”, and became one of the most celebrated and influential hip-hop artists ever, all because he followed the rapper he looked up to.

Another quintessential figure that has become a household name was a boy who at the age of 14, locked himself in his room and cried after being cut from his sophomore basketball team. Michael Jordan won 6 NBA championships, and became known as one of the most iconic sports figure ever. The discouragement of his failure was overcome by the stars telling him he could do anything if he practiced enough, sweating blood for oil which would fuel his aspirations.

And Beethoven, a boy whose father told him he wasn’t good enough, bent down on his floor and listened to the vibrations of the piano he took apart. He was a deaf, but he was also an idealist. His father’s discouraging voice was just another vibration attempting to tell him what he couldn’t do.

Every great that has ever lived once faced discouraging rancor, but they also faced inspirational footsteps to follow. “Unrealistic claims” are what truly define our society.

Agrasin

Last day tips for essay????

EnyoBella

Hey ! i was just curious, the essay must be written in 25minutes, how do you manage to write all your paragraphs with planning and what not?

EnyoBella

How do you manage to write so much in 25minutessss?!?!?!