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alright
i keep writing these essays
and don have any clue what im supposed to be getting
someone judge my essay so that i will change my writing method if it's crap
ill pm u both prompt and the essay
i'd probably give it an 8-9...
reasons for this are
a) the examples you provided, although extremely solid and relevant, werent detailed enough..it doesnt provide enough insight, i think
b) as you mentioned it yourself, the conclusion was really shaky..it seemed like you were waffling alot...avoid it!
other than that, it was a good read..with a few little tweaks you can reach double figures....
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