bulletandpima

As graduation approaches, I find myself looking at DS and wondering where did the time go? It was only a yr ago that we started the whole process and hoping in the back of mind he would somewhere during the yr change his mind and say the military isn't for me! Of course that did not happen, so now as I enter his room and see his cap and gown, I realize that as a military wife/mom I should have made it look harder () I wanted him to change for selfish reasons, just so I knew that after 20 yrs of roaming this earth, I wouldn't have to roam it for the next 20 to visit him it is nothing more or less than that! We are so very proud of him to personally know all the sacrifices we have made for the AF, but yet he says it is my duty, for someone so young to feel that way is just amazing. All of these kids get that the war may still be going on when they are commissioned and yet they have come to terms with this knowledge and have no fear of signing!

I know he will love this life as much as we have, but his hs yrs flew by and now I just feel like by the next time I blink he will be taking the oath and if he follows our footsteps it will be a decade before he is living close enough for us to spend holidays together again.

I think about when Bullet's cousin went to USNA and as the kids were leaving they played I'll be home for xmas!

I know this is a depressing post, but I just need to know if any other parents feel the same.

fencersmother

OH Pima, my cup is filled with tears of pride, but also because I know I will miss my twins so much. They, too, feel an incredible sense of duty, and know that this is their first best destiny. My selfish mom side wants to scream NO NO NO NO! My caring mom side says... what if they get sick, injured, lonely? How will I help them? My thinking side (wow, who knew I had so many sides) says they are doing what they SHOULD be doing, striving to be the best they can be... sigh. I want the last 18 years again.

momoftwins

fencersmother and bandp,

When my twin girls left almost 3 years ago it was so bittersweet. I was proud of them and so happy for them because they would each be doing what they wanted. As hard as it was, I knew it was great for them. I still miss them terribly. In my mind's eye I still see them crawling around, eating Cheerios to stop crying after falling, putting jigsaw puzzles together, reading Dr. Seuss by themselves, dancing to Disney tunes. I hear their voices and giggles. I see them so excited to have their own baby brother.

Now I'm getting ready for the baby (yeah, the tall one with the muscles and 5:00 shadow) to leave. It's not going to be any easier. Nope, you're not the only one crying.

flymom

Nope Pima, you're not alone.

The tears come when I least expect it. Good thing it's allergy season, I just say it's that darn pollen again.

Happy Mother's Day to all. It will probably be my last with all my babies in tow.

fencersmother

momoftwins: your inbox is full so you can't receive my pm.

momoftwins

fencersmother,

I cleaned it out. Now I'm going to go get teary-eyed again. I just had a flashback to the day we took the training wheels off.

wpmom2011

Ditto to everything you all said.

My cadet is my youngest (of 3) and I'm getting used to living by myself. Of course, on my teary days I can't tell if it's just missing the kids or hormones kicking up. lol

bulletandpima

Thanks everyone...I was beginning to believe that I was in a late onset of post partum depression!

Now my question is how did we become so fortunate to raise these amazing kids? Bullet and I must have done something really good in our last life! Don't you feel great to know that the US is safe in their hands?

usafamom

I find myself asking "Has it been 4 years already?" as I am putting the final touches on plans for our son's 2008 graduation from USAFA! I am asking the same questions as you all are--where did the time go? Welcome to the roller coaster of having a child at a SA. I can say that it does get easier each year as you watch your son/daughter adjust and thrive in their new environment. You will be amazed at what they achieve and shake your head at some of the crazy things that they do! They are after all still teenagers.

I still make sure that I have tissues and sunglasses whenever we are at the Academy for any functions. I am including tissues in our goodie bags for our friends and family members who are attending the graduation ceremony.

My advice is enjoy them while they are home--start looking for cartoons etc you can send them in the daily letters that you will send to them during basic training. Hand out pre-adressed and stamped envelopes to friends and relatives so that they can send letters. One comment we received from our "Doolie" was "You can write more than one time a day if you want". The letters they receive are their only contact with the "Outside world" while they are at BCT.

Save pictures and information as time goes by--you will want them for that graduation scrap book. Better yet, start that scrap book now --I'm trying to put it all together at one time! Where has the time gone?

bulletandpima

WOW

That was beautiful!

Believe it or not 20 yrs go by too fast also!

Where will your child be going? Have you booked the tickets to visit already!

I get the sunglasses since I have already told Bullet I will be wearing them so DS doesn't see me cry!

As a wife who has spent most of her adult life in the AF, every squadron, every base has made me feel so welcomed and loved. I know how hard it will be for your family to part, but I can tell you from experience that my house was always filled with laughter on holidays and I have friends that would get on a plane in a heartbeat if we called The old adage we don't get to choose our family, but we can choose our friends to be family is so true!

usafamom

Our son is scheduled for UPT in Columbus MS, however ,he is waiting to hear regarding a waiver for an eye condition (he has better than 20-20 vision) but the shape of his cornea is an issue. So we still don't know where he will be after his 60 day leave.

We too have felt very welcome at all of the AFA academy functions that we have attended. Our son is on the Wings of Blue Parachute Team and they have always made us feel welcomed when we have come out to see the team perform.

We live in Las Vegas so we have had the opportunity to host many of our son's friends over the course of the last four years and I am always impressed with all of them. Our son found a place where he felt that he belonged from his first day at the academy, what more can a parent ask for their child?

markerr

Senior year banquets, receptions, ceremonies......soon baccalaureate, graduation, preparing to leave for a SA - we're crying, laughing and beaming with pride all at the same time. This is emotional overload at its finest. I loved the "delayed post partum depression" suggestion, but age and my body tell me I'm further down the timeline. Not sure if 20 years as a military wife is more of a blessing or a curse as I wait for my second of three sons to leave in June. He fills the house with music practically every moment he is here and there will be a deafening silence when he goes - I wonder how will I survive without the sound of his voice and instruments. I am certain he is ready for all the SA "offers" and know that his time there will help smooth any rough edges that may have been overlooked here. I will give the postal service a workout soon and will be grateful for e-mail and cell phones as soon as they can be used. While the letting go is painful, I bet we all feel that its been a privilege to parent our kids and now share them with the country that we love. I really enjoyed this thread - thanks to bandp for starting it.

jashbela

i've been crying too.i dont want him gone.i cried a lot with post partum depression and i've been doing same.i cant believe he is going to be gone in 3 months.i want to hold him again.without him this home want be a home.i love him too much.another thing is that since i can't believe he is grown man , i worry too much.tonite is graduation and i dont want to go.

jashbela

btw i am not service academy mom and i am feeling bad.sorry

bulletandpima

Jashbela

Congrats on your sons graduation. We all understand your feelings. I hope this will make it easier for you...don't cry he will be home for the holidays and vacations (if he chooses ) I hope you pop your head in here every now and then to cheer yourself up. SA and ROTC parents have an additional burden that they know this truly is their goodbye. SA parents will be given a limited amount of seconds to hug and kiss their child. I recall Bullets Aunt telling the story of when her son walked away for USNA they blared over the loudspeakers I'll be home for Christmas.

I am with you on the tears and so are many parents, but I prefer to give you a positive thought. Here it is: When your DS graduates he may decide to get a job within your area or close to it. Next summer he'll either come home or stay to do summer classes, but you will not have to re-arrange your schedule for the limited amount of time you can get with him.

As I sit here I just realized that a cadet that we have become close to will give up some of his time to be with us.

The worst part of internet forums is that you are not seeing the other person. I mean everything I say with heartfelt warmth, and I am jealous of you, since I know for a fact that after 20 yrs of wandering the world with my DH, I now have a child who will wander it for another 20 (he has the personality that he is in it for the long run)

TO EVERYONE ELSE
Many yrs ago I bought a wandering jew and I joked b/c I could relate I have never had a home without one b/c it reminds and grounds me about this life. Thus, I am sending y'all one. The beauty of the plant is that tendrils will fall into the ground and plant themselves..just like our children!